Gaming Stereotypes

All gamers have seen them. Everyone else has heard about them. Yes, they're GAMING STEREOTYPES. Found in all games, they have caused me to provide you with information about them for pretty much no reason. Let's start off with classic platformers.

Deadly Water: In almost every platformer game, the one obstacle we must all avoid is water. Yes, common H2O. Is it too hot? Too cold? Is your character like the Wicked Witch of the West and melts when coming in contact with any liquids? Either way, AVOID THE WATER! Water is death! Touch the water, and you shall suffer a merciful, painless death at the hands of the fluid!

Moving Platforms: Are they controlled by magic? Are they technologically advanced machines with an anti-gravity device? Is a telekinetic behind the scenes moving them with his mind? Are they simple illusions that cause our brain to activate a mental levitation of sorts when we believe in them? No matter the cause, moving platforms are always the bane of the platform gamer's existence, floating just out of reach miliseconds before we land on them. They are the ultimate torture!

Deadly Puzzles: Even worse than platforms, the deadly puzzles are put in for no reason in the darndest of places. Are they planted by your enemies at night? Are they a series of coincidences that always occur at the same time? Are they just there so the machine can force you to feed more coins into it's maw? Who knows? Spinning blades, flamethrowers and other emplaced weapons activating at timed intervals, gigantic presses, and trap doors are there to take your money!

Repetitive Jumping: How come the Average Joe is always the greatest high jumper alive? Mario, Luigi, all of them! I can see it now: Mario and Luigi at the Olympics, winning gold medals in high jumping 10 times over!

"Deadly" Enemies: The enemies are some of the hardest elements in the gaming world. They kill on contact, as if their bodies are covered with poison. And yet, despite their ability to kill without even trying, most can be disintegrated with a single attack. Why? And why is your attack so powerful that they disappear when killed? Does your attack have such power that the atoms themselves are destroyed?

And finally...

Lives: Why does the character have a set number of "lives", tries that can be used to accomplish his or her objective? Whenever they die, no matter how horrible or painful, they always come back in perfect shape not far from where they died. I prefer games that have one life, as you are given one try to win, and you have WAY more bragging rights when you beat the level on one try, rather than 7.

Join me next time as I dive into the world of RPGs! Later!