Struggling

No, I just don’t feel like it.
I’ll probably see you later.

I don’t know what’s wrong.
Why do I feel this way?

It’s never been this bad.
I’ve always moved on.

What was a simple itch is
Now a severe scratch.

I wanted pain.
I wanted blood.

You say I worry you, but
It’s not the way I worry me.

I had a headstart,
But you're still winning.

I should be more giving.
No that’s not the word.

I should not feel this way.
Do you? I can’t tell.

Maybe a hot shower will
Wash this mood away.