|Interview With Hades
Author: Luthiena o Lorien PM
A wacky adventure with Hades in his DARK ABODE! Written when I was eleven...may create a series...PLEASE REVIEW!Rated: Fiction K - English - Humor/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,440 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 06-14-05 - Published: 06-12-05 - id: 1937926
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Interviewer: ((Looks around, unsure where she is supposed to go. Jumps when a figure appears out of thin air.))
Hades: Hi there! My name is Hades, but you can call me...((pauses dramatically)) Hades. ((Shoots interviewer the cool sign, you know, put your thumb up, and stick out your index finger, with all the other fingers curled in...))
Interviewer: Um...okay then. how do we get to your place?
Hades: Place? Place?! What in MY NAME is a PLACE?!
Interviewer: Oh, you know...It is where you live, in other words, your home...
Hades: Ah, you mean my DOMAIN...my DARK ABODE! ((evil laughter))
Interviewer: Ah, yeah...sure..whatever you want to call it.
Hades: Okey-dokey then. Here we go! ((snaps fingers and a black tornado appears and sucks them in))
Interviewer: ((screams like Hades is out to get her...oh, wait, he is!))
Narrator: Five seconds later, they appear in a shadowy room...((ominous music))
Hades: Here, have a seat. ((snaps his fingers and a sinister looking chair with legs and a gaping mouth filled with sharp teeth scuttles up to them))
Interviewer: Is...is it safe?
Hades: ((sounding exasperated)) Of course it is safe.
Interviewer: ((looking nervous)) Are you sure?
Hades: ((sounding slightly, only SLIGHTLY, annoyed)) Of course I'm sure!
Interviewer: Are you absolutely, positively, completely su-
Hades: I AM ABSOLUTELY SURE, NOW PLEASE TAKE A SEAT!!!!! ((Picks up the poor interviewer, who is now shaking with fear and uncapable of movement, and slams her down into the chair))
(Note: No interviewers were hurt in the making of this...interview. At least, I don't think so.)
Hades: ((stops screaming nonsensically in ancient Greek, pants, and wipes imaginary sweat off of his forehead, and returns to his normal voice)) Sorry about that! Now, did you want to ask me some questions? Please, feel free to ask me anything!
Interviewer: ((In squeaky voice- think 'mouse')) Um...Do you have any pets?
Hades: I sure do! ((whistles)) Cerberus! Here boy!
Interviewer: ((gasps and turnseven more pale than before as a three-headed dog runs into the room)) What IS that thing?
Hades: I know! Isn't he just the most precious thing you have ever set eyes on? He's the prettiest three-headed dog in the world, isn't he?!
Interviewer: ((unsure)) Um...((coughs uncormfortably)) Yeah, I guess so...
Hades: ((Seems not to notice Interviewer's response for he is too busy rubbing Cerberus's tummy, as he starts cooing in a sickly sweet voice)) Who's a pretty boy? Who's a pretty BOY?! ((Cerberus wags his tail madly))You are, Cerberus! OH, YES YOU ARE!!!! ((Cerbie wags his tail even harder than before, if that is possible))
Interviewer: Um...can we please get on with the interview?
Hades: Oh, um, of course! ((coughs)) Sorry!
Interviewer: No, it is okay.
Hades: So, what did you want to ask me?
Interviewer: Let us see here...((checks notepad)) Hmm...What do you like to do in your freetime?
Hades: Play with Cerbie.
Interviewer: Are there any other things you like to do?
Hades: Play with Cerbie.
Interviewer: Is there anything besides playing with Cerberus that you enjoy?
Hades: Hmm...that is a tough question...I know! Count my money!
Interviewer: ARGH! That is IT! I'm leaving this madhouse! ((gets up)) Where is the exit? ((stomps randomly around the room))
Hades: Stop! Wait! That is the- ((is cut off by a blood curdling scream)) The hydra's room... ((finishes unenthusiastically)) I tried to warn you.
Interviewer: Yes, I know, but you do not have to rub it in.
Hades: Yes I do to have to rub it in!
Interviewer: ((groans loudly and dramatically))
Hades: Wow! You are good! Lemme try! ((imitates Interviewer's pitiful groan))
Interviewer: Stop it!
Hades: My turn! Stop it!
Interviewer: I mean it!
Hades: I mean it!
Interviewer: You better stop!
Hades: You better stop!
Interviewer: That's it! I'm leaving!
Hades: That's it! I'm leaving!
Interviewer: ((Storms around the room once again trying to find the exit))
Hades: ((Copies Interviewer's movements))
Interviewer: ((Jumps up and down in frustration))
Hades: ((Does the same))
Interviewer: ((Stops dead in her tracks and stands absolutely still))
Hades: ((does the same as Interviewer. All is silent for awhile, until-)) Is the game over?
Interviewer: Yes! The game is over!
Hades: Okay! What do you want to play now?!
Interviewer: Nothing! Nothing at all! Now, please, show me the exit!
Hades: ((whining)) I wanna play another game!
Interviewer:((angry)) Fine! What do you want to play?!
Hades: Duck duck goose...
Interviewer: ((reluctantly)) Well, okay...
Hades: For three hours!
Interviewer: ((splutters)) Wha-what?!! THREE HOURS?! But that is-
Hades: Do you wanna leave or not?!
Interviewer: ((sighs, resigned)) Fine...
THREE HOURS LATER
Interviewer: Okay! It has been three hours! ((pants))
Hades: Oh, all right...I guess a deal's a deal. ((Snaps fingers and Interviewer disappears)) Good-bye! I'll miss you!!!!!
Interviewer: ((Appears in a sunny field. Looks around)) WHO-HOO! FREE AT LAST! ((Runs off into the sunset))
Well, there ya go...some poetic liscense was used. I may create a series...I dunno...PLEASE REVIEW!!! glares I finally fixed the action/ speech problem...Stupid site would not let me post stars for some reason....