I tore out my heart

As I sat at my desk.

The teacher’s words

fell to the floor.

And the students

all turned to wax

and sank away.

One desk

At the back of the class

Was empty.

And my nightmares

Whispered in my head

‘He is dead!’

‘He is dead!’

The bell rang

But I didn’t hear

Sound was

Muffled by my fear.

I went through the day

In a dreaming daze.

I scribbled on paper,

Page after page

Broken but beautiful.

Drowned

Broken but beautiful.

That is what he was.

In my mind

I had watched him drown.

And not done a thing

Just watched him sink.

For days

He had been drowning

For years

I had known.

I could see

His darkening heart

Being torn apart

Wave after wave.

But I did not say

A word to him

Just passed him

Like a stranger

Day after day.

I was supposed to save him!

I was the only one who knew!

The only one who noticed

what he was going through!

Some days

He reached for my hand

And I pulled away

I wanted to hold him,

to let him hold me

But, cowards are cowards

And love scared me.

‘ Broken but beautiful’

Was all I could see.

Shattered glass

On a crystal sea.

I came home

Like always

I lay in my room alone.

I wanted to cry

But the mirror was mocking

My reflection shouting

“You let him Die!”

“No.”

“It is all over.”

“No… he lives.”

‘Your heart is broken

just like his

but yours is ugly.”

‘Broken but beautiful”

I wrote it out

And smashed it down.

Silver reality fell all around

The fragments cut my palms

But no tears would come.

I lay on the remains

Trying to silence

The voices.

I played a C.D.

And my Music Box.

But the Shouts in my head

Would not come out.

In came Mom

She looked on the ground

Silver shards

Surrounded her daughter.

She shouted

Over the music

“What have you Done?!”

“What have you Done!?”

That was how

it all begun.

My dreams are louder

And my parents whisper

About my condition.

And they cry

Calling me crazy

Calling me evil.

They ask me,

‘Why?’

But I cannot explain.

So they say

“She must be insane.”

Maybe they are right

May be there is a demon.

That is the only reason

I wander out at night

And burn away my sins.

But no matter how much

I cut away

The demon still breathes

In my skin.

He still lives.