STAGE FRIGHT!!

-

Everyone has a Very Worst Fear –

Heights, bugs, dandelions, its there.

But mine's a tad more unusual, I fear

Something that I'm terribly ashamed to share.

-

You see the thing that gets me

Most in the knees

Is the wee little weevil

Called Public Speaking.

-

The horror begins

When my name is called,

My insides are jellied

And Oh Dear! Cries the Lord!

-

My heart leaps out

And commits suicide

While my lungs protest

And go on strike.

-

My knees start a-shaking

With wild, NEW life,

And my ankles join in

In gleefully fervent strife.

-

So wobble wobble wobble

As I quiver to the front

And NO! NO! NO!

I'm not doing this, I can't!

-

Then I'm standing there, trembling,

The local nutcase

My brain having vanished

And Mr. Weevil in its place.

-

And I'm stared at, scrutinized,

Examined and x-rayed

As I hold my paper just right

An inch from my face.

-

So with that poor excuse

For a strong, sturdy cover

I plaster on a frantic smile

Cursing my knees, those lousy traitors!

-

Then I creak open my mouth

And begin to croak and quaver–

Going on for an eternity

Going on forever–

-

–It's over before I know it

And I stand stock still

Before zooming back to my seat

And shrinking until

-

I'm no more than a

Mere bitty speck

An ostrich with its head

Buried up to its neck

-

And there, I stay, frozen

Until another age has passed

And I realize – wait a moment,

That was a blast!

-

But really, don't worry

When the next chance arrives

- I'm an astoundingly good ostrich -

I'll be blissfully sick with hives.

-

Hey all you guys!!:o)

Erm, is anyone even reading this? Well, if you are, THANK YOU SO MUCH!!:):) Oh, I'd really LOVE if you would review -cough--ahem- ... so if you've read till here and haven't yet done so, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR??!??!!

Yes.:-) -coughs delicately- So anyway, that was a poem I'd written as a Literature assignment ... last year.. I was trying my hand at humour, and I thought it wasn't too shabby. Hope you enjoyed it!:) LOL thanks.

BlueJay