Chapter 1

“So, Felicity, dear, what is your answer? Shall we wed?”

Felicity smiled thinly at her suitor, Sir Richard. He was a broad man with thick blonde hair and piercing blue eyes. Compassion and brilliance filled every aspect of his wealthy life. He had gone to scribe school for five years before taking up archery, which ultimately lead to his career. Military. Richard would have been the perfect husband for a wealthy noble girl like Felicity. True she was but 17, barely a woman. Felicity’s father, Sir Fredrick, a famously rich man was deathly ill. His large estate was to go to Felicity, but law implied that a woman could not be head of such a large manor. Felicity needed a husband or the family property would go to the governor of her colony and she would be forced to become a nun. Felicity had waited too long to become the mother of a brave soldier or beautiful maiden to give up her dreams now. She couldn’t become a nun. She wouldn’t. Even if it meant marrying Richard who was 39, more than twice her age, Felicity would cling to that dream.

But of course there were complications that Felicity’s mild schizophrenia, unknown at the time, found very troublesome. For one thing, Richard was very old. Before long, she would need to wed again and perhaps at that point she would not have so many dashing, young suitors. Another point she failed to miss was that he was never home. While some wives found that attractive because it put them in legal control of the estate, she found it lonesome. Her mother had died when she was very young. Because of this, she was Fredrick’s only child. The two were extremely close, but Fredrick was a noble and he was often called away on important trips. Felicity hated being the only one, besides the slaves. She would have hated to be left alone while Richard was fighting.

Richard was very kind to Felicity, but his eyes were known to wander. The last thing Felicity needed was her beloved husband eyeing some 14 year old girl. Men like him were known to go to the dungeon for rape. Felicity would then have to manage a lonely house based on income from the government if they were feeling generous. Their fickle generosity was not something Felicity wanted to rely on. Of course there was the farm for Felicity to tend so she would still make some what of a profit.

Felicity was also very temperamental. Her anger was long lasting and difficult to endure. Richard’s little annoying traits got the best of her. She hated when he would smack the female slaves in the streets on the rump. He also neglected to change his clothes for days. The stench was enough to drive her up the wall. He also ate only certain foods. He wouldn’t go near green beans, imported rice, turkey, squash, apple pie, certain cheeses, milk that was more than three hours old, salad with more than 50 lettuce, tomatoes, olives, corn or walnuts. And those were only the foods Felicity knew of that Richard refused. She was sure the list went on.

But then, of all her suitors, he was the only one that would accept her land. All the others wished to simply whisk her off and cage her in a strange manor. They couldn’t manage two farms and the price they’d fetch for hers was more than the profit it could bring in. Felicity knew that Richard was her best bet at a fairy tale ending, though most happy endings bored her senseless. He was her shot at realizing her dream. A cozy castle, several children, comfortable living. Richard was her chance to do the best for her future self. And perhaps he would die in battle and her fabulous dream son could take over and care for his mother. Felicity reminded herself that Richard was watching her with greedy eyes. She readjusted her fake smile and looked him over.

He was handsome, she’d give him that. He hardly looked a day over 20. But he was 39. Old enough to be her father. Well actually Fredrick was 48. Felicity shook her head and tried to concentrate. She pictured herself next to him.

Her lovely long locks of brown hair, tied up in an elegant bun would be covered by a dainty bonnet. She envisioned a beautiful gown made from the same rosy print as her bonnet. She’d have elbow length sleeves and a plunging neckline. The neckline would be filled with gathered ivory silk, giving her a look of intimate wealth. She could picture her gloved hands holding properly to Richard’s muscular forearm. His hair would be combed back and he would be wearing nice slacks with a long sleeved white shirt. Around her neck would hang a silver locket, the gift she would receive from her father. On her hand would be a large diamond ring, showing her bond to gorgeous man next to her.

Felicity sighed. She’d forgotten to envision Fredrick. She was determined that her first born son be named Fredrick, just like her father. She hadn’t spoken to Richard about this. But of course, there wasn’t a need to yet. She hadn’t even accepted or refused his offer to wed. Oh! His offer. She needed to answer that before he grew impatient.

“Richard,” she began, choosing her words carefully, “do watch out for that small goose, darling. We wouldn’t want to row into it, would we?” She had danced around the subject nicely. Richard pouted and turned his attention to rowing the boat they sat in. It was a nice little wooden boat. Felicity knew that if she married Richard, owning this boat would be a plus. She could take it out and row it in the large lake on her estate. Though he owned a small estate where he kept the boat, he was eager, just as she was, to live in Fredrick’s home. Right then, they were drifting on a lazy river that was quite popular for couples to boat on. They had chosen to come at midnight so that they could have the river to themselves. Richard was unfortunately a hopeless romantic.

“Fel,” he started,

“I don’t approve of pet names Richard,” Felicity interjected.

“Felicity, you’re the most beautiful woman I have ever met. I love you dearly and I could take care of you. Please say that you’ll be mine,” he was almost begging. Felicity found that unattractive as well as funny.

“Oh Richard, I need time to consider your blatant offer. It’s such a marvelous idea, the two of us,” okay, she was lying. Sort of. It could have been a marvelous idea if he wasn’t so annoying.

“Consider what? You said so yourself it was a marvelous idea. I love you. What more do you need than love?” Oh Richard, she thought, if only you knew. If only you knew.

“Richard, I’m so sorry but it really is more complicated than that. In 10 years, love will not matter as much to me. I will be 27, probably caring for your children and you will be off at war. The love of my life will be my children, not you. Even if you were still the love of my life, how would love pay for food? How will love support all my needs? If you a brother I could rely on, then perhaps it would be so chancy. But you haven’t a brother and there still needs to be something solid between us, not something loose and unpredictable like love,” she finished her speech feeling slightly guilty. That was a lie. In ten years he would be dead, hopefully. Lost love would have nothing to do with her moving on and forgetting about him.

“But Felicity, you can’t mean that. Just weeks ago you told me that love was the driving force for life. You told me true love was everything.”

“Yes but I was drunk that night. If I remember correctly, that was the night of Elizabeth’s engagement party. We were all drunk. You cannot hold someone to something they said as a drunken fool.”

“Some say that the words said while drunk come from deepest in the heart,” Richard whispered, defeated.

“No one says that, you fool,” Felicity snapped. Richard began to blink back tears.

“Oh dearest, I didn’t mean that. I’m just so forlorn about my poor father. He is so ill, you know,” Felicity was used to making up excuses so this one came naturally. She patted Richard’s check. He brightened at the touch of her hand. Felicity shuddered. Moments ago he had been eyeing her hungrily. What kind of hell would she endure while living with him? The disgusting job of being his sex slave? She shuddered again. This man was a monster, she knew it. Many of his friends were the same way. Felicity had seen them dragging fragile 14 year old girls around after them. The girls were already pregnant. Felicity would not suffer that fate.

Thunder suddenly boomed about them. Seconds later lightning light up the sky and thunder followed again. Felicity leaned back. She loved storms. They were so calming. They made her problems seem minuscule compared to the imaginary troubles of the sky. The thin mist that had been hanging around them was torn to shreds as heavy rain pounded down on the couple.

“Richard,” she bellowed over the noise, “there is a small cove, just beyond the river bend. Let’s try to take cover there.”

Richard didn’t answer, he simply began rowing furiously. Felicity held her breath for a moment, wait for more lightning. She didn’t have to wait long. Another graceful fork of lightning spilt the stormy sky. Thunder boomed after it. The seconds seemed to pass like decades. With each crack of the lightning and each blast of thunder, Richard turned a bit paler and his rowing became clumsier. Frustrated, Felicity snatched the ores from him. She started rowing as best she could towards the cove. Suddenly Richard screeched. A huge rock was looming dead ahead. Felicity must have mistaken it for fog. Felicity barely had time to yell “jump,” before there was a sickening crack and the boat crashed into the rock.

She hit the cool, stormy water silently. In her panicked state of mind, she stripped of her long, cotton dress so that she was swimming in her under clothes. The dress, which was torn off, was quickly sinking. Richard, meanwhile, was trying to swim in his full outfit. “Strip,” Felicity bellowed at him. His eyes light up for a second before he realized the seriousness of the situation. He did as he was advised and swam towards her. They were swimming tirelessly to shore, hopeful, though the odds were against them.

“Felicity,” he shouted over the crashing waves, “kiss me in case we both die.” She looked at him like he was crazy. Richard grabbed her arms and pulled her towards him. “Stop, Richard. We’ll both drown!” Richard didn’t seem to mind. He was kissing her forcibly, and had wrapped his legs around her thighs as she thrashed her legs, trying to keep their weight from drowning them. They began to sink quickly. Richard let up on her for a second, shaking his head bewildered under the dark waters. “No!” Felicity cried, choking on the water. Her vision was going. Her ears had popped. She struggled to swim to the surface, but the waves kept crashing down on her, propelling her down, down.

By the time the waves spat her out on the shore, she was almost dead. Richard was barely alive, too. Their crash onto the rocky shore tore their bodies apart. Felicity and Richard died. They were buried under sand and stones. Fredrick never knew what became of his only daughter. He survived his illness, inspired to live for his daughter. He remarried and had 5 children, three of whom survived to adulthood. The other two, his only girls, both died at the strangely coincidental age of 17. Of course, by then, Fredrick was well into his 60’s. He died weeks before the death of his twin daughters. Only their heart broken mother heard them screaming the night they died. She was slightly alarmed that both screamed “Felicity” as they died, but unaware of Fredrick’s late daughter, Felicity, she thought nothing of it.

Felicity would probably have said ‘no’ to Richard, for the record. No one ever knew that, though. And it was a shame. Had she lived, she would have made a terrific head of the house while Richard was away.