I don't cut myself to feel the pain;
I do it for the blood.
It's not so much as if I am watching the pain leave my body;
At that point, what drove me to it has slipped away.
I just know that I don't get relief until the blood comes;
Once I see it, I can finally relax.
That satisfactionalso carries on-
Looking back on the fresh cuts, the scabs and even the scars Reminds me of the relief I was granted when things were too much to take.