"I want to go back to conveyor belt school" yelled the cheese to the lunchmeat on a lower shelf, hoping he could hear. "I'm sick of waiting for God to give us our chance to be together again"
"We are all just a heirarchy of god" Yelled the Lettuce.
Then a pale, creepy, thin girl with black hair grabbed the lettuce and tore it into peices and put them in a colorful striped bowl and then poured a little-just a little- bit of dressing onto it. then she took her fork in her pale, thin hand and stirred the lettuce, and slowly chewed each bite of salad in between sips of water. that was dinner, her last meal of the day. she tossed and turned all night.

and the scale laughed and made fun of her the next day. she had only lost 2 pounds.

really the scale was just feeling cynical because he was sick of being expected to know all the answers and being stepped all over and disrespected and really it was a very lonely life, and it had left him feeling bitter. he remembered one day when a rubber ducky had been left sitting right next to him on the floor in the corner of the bathroom and him and R. Duck, as he liked to be called, had sat and had a philosophical conversation for hours, and told eachother their life stories and all their secrets, and bonded, and the duck had promised he would return when the little girl grabbed him for bath time. But the scale had never seen again.

He didn't trust anyone anymore.

The pale girl had her boyfriend over and she lay face down with her ass in the air while the clock watched and laughed. the clock was rather old and getting senile and it thought everything was funny now. Even when the pale girl's boyfriend hesitated and scratched his head and then turned away with a sad expression on his face and then the pale girl got up and held a knife to his neck and then pulled him down on top of her with the knife still pressed and a look of unholy pleasure on her face. The clock continued to laugh.

"What's so fucking funny?" asked the painting of naked ladies. She was sick of being stared at. She was sick of everything she knew, she was sick of just hanging on this wall all the time, she wanted to travel. But she knew she couldn't travel and so she wanted to kill herself but she didn't know how.

"Everything is funny when you've been alive long enough. I've been with this girl since she was shitting in her diapers. And she was evil back then too. Her mother was evil, and her mother's mother was evil..." then he couldn't finish his sentence because he weazed out a huge belly laugh in between each tick and tock for several tick tocks.

That night, as pale girl, and hesitant boy lay curled together in the bed, girl tossed and turned, and boy muttered his unhappiness to himself in his sleep; and the old clock quietly giggled as it died.

Suddenly, the girl and boy were woken with a start by a loud crash. They looked around to see that her favorite painting had fallen off the wall. "How the hell did that happen?" pale girl said. "I don't fuckin' know" pale boy said. The painting winced at all the curse words as their faces hovered over her and she cringed. "please just get me the fuck out of here! I'm so sick of this place!!!" she screamed in terror. The pale girl hung her back on the wall, and they went back to sleep.

"Everything is as it should be. Everything is ok." The lamp told the painting, because she was crying.
"Oh, shut up." she said.