crying is the only answer it seems

everything’s hitting so fast

frustration, pain, anxiety, shame,

sadness, fear, exuberance,

desperation, serenity,

it all makes no sense

the quiet stability I built has been broken

one bottle, one kiss, one boy, one camp

morphed everything

a simple, black-and-white world I created for refuge

has become a technicolor emotional whirlpool

I lost

and he’s my only certain.