“Adulthood”—Imitation of Nikki Giovanni’s “Adulthood”

ooo

I always wondered who I’d become

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When I was a little kid on a swing set

Playing spaceship on swing—how far up can we go

(I’d marry the pilot neighbor boy someday)

it didn’t mean anything

and I thought about

everything seeming straight up and down

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then everything changed in a single day—grade school

myself gone topsy turvy

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when I was somewhat older I always played

up to my knees in creek water

with new girl in braces

making fantastic fairytales about us

(each with dreamed boy)

and I didn’t even know what it meant

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but then I headed to high school fast paced and nuts

I slowed down and couldn’t tell left from diagonal right

So I could go diagonal left—or was it supposed to be diagonal right?

Screwed up from SAT, ACT, AP madness brain gone to mush senseless letters

But that’s all right since I saw diagonal right

And I could go to college

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So spinning diagonals and 2x3 ln(3x2) cacophony

Got straightened out and stood still so I could stop fluttering after

Sending out foreign pieces of paper that I didn’t understand

And everything was dates and things—what was which was when

And time burned itself a hole in

Trying to make diagonals spin until they made no sense

Just me

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Began just eventually realizing who everone else was

Were just like me with me

Forever

D--- was mean

And C--- was cruel

And CH--- was gone

And K--- was lost

And G--- was crazy

And no one was there

And M--- was forgetful

And I--- was bitter

And CH--- was a bastard

And LA--- was awkward

And S--- was ignoring

And L--- was pissed

And MO--- was close by

And I--- was spinning

And no one was there

Spinning through time and places and life wondering

Where did I—diagonals—fit in

Plotting a course on imaginary maps

Instead of dealing with reality but life

And diagonals

Spin