Train

Three days ago, my breathing hitched --
Sunlight's erupted out of pitch!
My heart, so tired out and lean,
Remembered it was seventeen.

Enamored and entranced by voice,
By hair and eyes, I had no choice.
And very little to my name;
No more defense from where it came.

With roaring words and quiet thoughts,
Restlessly I wove the knots,
Forgetting warnings I myself
Constructed for my mental health.

Two times before, I'd tried to catch
A boy I thought could be my match,
And every time, my fingers broke
Against the tugging of his yoke.

And now it seems this one, the third,
Will also fly, as would a bird,
On wings of haste, to arms of love,
A sharp releif with the clouds above,

Leave me, with bitter throat, on earth,
And forkéd tongue and shriveled mirth,
My preparations all in vain,
Knowing again -- I've missed the train.

August 9, 2005.