I guess you really never forget the firsts. The first kiss, the first time someone tells you they love you, the first time you’re proposed to. You never forget the first time he/she tells you that they never want to love anyone else. The first time they whisper, “Will you marry me?”

You never forget that. You never forget the closeness, the attraction, or how beautiful he/she is in your eyes. How time apart ripped you to pieces and how you called every five minutes just to make sure that they still knew you loved them. How you learned how to survive off of a phone call from across the country.

But you also never forget the heartache. You never forget being dumped by that person that swore they’d love you until they died, or seeing them with someone else. You never forget what that sear of pain through your heart feels like when someone whispers his or her name and it still hurts. There are some things you can never forget no matter how hard you try.

And you will try. You’ll beg and plead with your heart to let them go. To hate them. To wish them happiness with someone else. But sometimes, that little school-girl-crush is more than you ever imagined. Sometimes it’s love.