As I Sit Here

As I sit here, lost and lonely,

Dark and death flow through my mind,

Thoughts of suicide consume me,

And leave all happiness behind.

I seek a place where I can find

A refuge from myself,

And weep in my deepening depression,

But there is nothing of me left.

My soul has fled, a hollow shell

Is what I have become,

I hate myself, I don't know

And don't care where these feelings have come from.

I don't know who I am anymore,

I've lost myself I fear.

The rest of me is drained away

Along with all my tears.

Death seems like my only deliverance,

And so I clutch my knife,

But I cannot bring myself to do it,

I cannot end my life.

So I lie inside myself and scream,

For I cannot escape the signs,

I've driven myself to hell on earth,

I've left happiness behind.