Author: maddheather PM
They were once known through GrecoRoman times as the three vengeful spirits that punished the horrible transgressions of humanity. Now, in modern times, the Three Furies have mellowed out and traded their ruthlessness for modern conveniences.Rated: Fiction M - English - Parody/Supernatural - Words: 3,416 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Published: 10-07-05 - Status: Complete - id: 2022609
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Tisiphone wrinkled her nose at the tone-challenged musician grinding away at his bass guitar on stage. She twirled a slick black tendril of her hair around her finger, rolling her eyes as the musician yowled painfully, causing the crowd of drunks at the bar to cringe.
Next to her, Megaera sighed heavily, biting away at the chipping paint on her fingernails and trying unsuccessfully to run her fingers through her bright orange dreads. When Tisiphone noticed her beginning to pick her nose, she turned her head away quickly in disgust.
On Tisiphone's right she saw Alecto groan as she looked impatiently around the dark smoky bar, scoping out for their target. As she turned her head to look behind her for the umpteenth time, Tisiphone watched at a strand of her short blonde hair fall out of place, causing her friend to quickly push it back behind her ears, smoothing it over compulsively.
"Man, this sucks," Megaera whined, protruding her bottom lip into a pout. She idly stirred the remains of her watered down margarita and started at the drooping lime, curled up at the bottom. "When is this bum going to get here? This place really blows. And the margaritas are really shitty."
Tisiphone crossed her arms and looked at Alecto sternly. "I concur. The music is horrible. It smells like Medusa's butt hole, and worst of all, they don't have my beer. What kind of place that brags about having 156 different kinds of beer doesn't have Killian's? It's a fucking crime."
"Bah!" Alecto scoffed, waving her hand at her. "Be quiet, will you? I'm tired of your strange tastes for Irish beers." She turned to Megaera and wagged a finger. "And you, stop biting your nails! The noises are driving me crazy. How can I plan our next strategy when I can't hear myself think?"
"You know, Tissi," Megaera said in a squeaky voice no doubt influenced by the booze. "You can't expect these jokers to hide out at the Ritz, now do you?" She sighed, scrunching her nose as she looked around at all the bar flies slumping over their drinks. "It sure beats that last hole we were in going after that cult leader."
Tisiphone grunted in agreement and exhaled in exasperation. She looked around and studied all the people enjoying themselves at the bar, grinding to the bad music, getting drunk on the cheap booze and swaying their bodies in drug-induced trances. She sniffed, cursing her finer senses as the scent of sex lingered in the air.
She felt even more ill as the cause of that smell glided over to their table, leering at the three of them with a lecherous intent.
"Hey there ladies, where's the party?" The three women looked up and glared at the thin, greasy haired toad of a man grooving his body in a dance as he approached them. When they said nothing, the man continued to be annoying, budging for a response. "Why the sad faces? Maybe you gals just need to get up and dance with Benny the Boomer, and those frowns will turn upside down."
Benny the Boomer looked at them with a deadpan expression. Their cold shoulders had rendered him speechless, and before he could stutter out another phrase, Alecto turned to him with intense brown eyes burning almost red. He gulped, as he had never seen eyes glow like that before.
"Look, human. I suggest you leave if you value the line of your pitiful descendants," Alecto snarled, and Benny shriveled back, feeling an odd sort of pressure from the girl as she glared at him.
"R—right, I get it, cats. You ladies prefer the clam meat. Old Benny can take a hint." The other two girls glared at him, their eyes burning with the same intensity as Alecto. Benny yelped, and promptly scurried away.
And when that was all over and done, Alecto sighed, feeling a bitter taste in her mouth from the whole incident. Megaera only played with her hair out of boredom, and Tisiphone's face contorted in a vicious expression, prompting her usual bitchery.
"Gees, I really hate my job. What happened to the old days where humans worshipped us as well as feared us? In the old days, the men would say something like that, our snakes would get all angry and hiss at them, and they would throw themselves at our feet. That guy acted like he didn't even know who we were!"
"I know! Alecto, it's just not fair!" Megaera complained in a shrill whine. "I don't feel like humans even know who we are anymore. I hate being known as a myth instead of a real person." She sniffled. "It hurts my feelings!" And Tisiphone was beside her and reluctantly patted her shoulder trying to soothe her.
Alecto sighed, tired of this same old discussion over and over again. "Sorry, ladies. It can't be helped. Greek Gods are the thing of the past, and humans only fear and respect symbols of Roman tyranny. Christianity is the new black," she replied, shrugging her shoulders. She really didn't think the issue really hurt their reputation. In fact, Alecto found it quite beneficial. "Besides, wasn't it you, Tisiphone, that always hated being in the limelight? I, for one, am glad the Greco-Roman ages are over. It was so…so totally dark ages!"
Tisiphone sighed again, inwardly agreeing with her comrade. It was so much easier now as they were. Sure, they didn't have the snakes in their hair anymore and had no use for the bat wings once Nemesis got them their own private jet and car. However, she secretly missed how humans feared them. Now, the only time people were ever really afraid was when they were getting their revenge on their targets.
And she had to admit, the modern conveniences were really nice.
Megaera squealed next to her, and as usual, she was overdramatic about everything. "Oh my God, you are so right, Alecto. I don't' know what I'd do without my internet or TV."
"And I don't know what I'd do without my caramel lattes," Alecto added, nodding to Megaera.
Megaera smiled widely at Tisiphone. "Don't forget, back in ancient Greece, we didn't have American Idol. I know Tissi would set a small country aflame if she couldn't have that."
Tisiphone smirked. "Well, you do have a point there, Meg."
"Right, and NONE of us would survive without Live Journal," Alecto pointed out. The three of them mutually sighed in agreement.
Finally, Tisiphone brought the discussion to a halt in impatience. "Alright, alright. I get it. So we sort of traded our medieval ransacking reputations for modern conveniences. I agree that things are better this way. Still, you have to admit that it is disappointing when people don't wet themselves when they hear our shrieking."
"And it is sad we can't kill people any more and not just torture them in crippling insanity," Megaera added, pouting.
"Not our fault. If Nemesis didn't get so obsessed with Buddhism, we'd still have a healthy body count in our wake," Alecto concluded, and her comrades grimaced as they all imagined their leader chanting mantras and going on about peace. It was a wonder Nemesis even cared they fulfilled their missions at all anymore.
Megaera sighed looking at Tisiphone with her big cute eyes. "In any case, it doesn't matter if they fear them anymore. We're doing something that humans can't do. We're helping people."
Tisiphone smiled at that statement, once again softened to the tone of Megaera's compassionate logic. Though she was broken from her thoughts when Alecto tugged at her arm pinching the skin, and then she directed Tisiphone's attention to the new arrival entering the bar.
Megaera and Tisiphone's once mellow expressions changed as they looked at Alecto intensely and then nodded.
Their target had arrived, which meant it was finally time to punch those time cards.
After a stressful day hunched over his computer in his tight, lackluster cubicle, Mark Greenwood felt he deserved a much needed break, and this place was perfect for it.
The owners here slightly knew him, and he was here almost every Friday night, requesting that they send him some of their bar girls to one of the back rooms, reserved for special customers.
Tonight was hardly different from any other night he had been here during the year, though now he didn't have to worry about stupid private detectives following him around and messing up his fine evenings.
In turn, it meant that he didn't have to worry about his wife and all her nagging about staying home and spending time with their children. He smiled, flexing his hands.
He didn't have to worry about it because he didn't have a wife anymore or any annoying children.
He sighed in satisfaction, anticipating the night's impending events. He hoped that Larry would send him a fine batch of girls for him to caress and watch and even fuck – at the same time or in all the most creative positions and games he could plan. The thought of such a deed made his mouth water, and he licked his lips in anticipation.
So he waited in one of the special bedrooms, and after talking to Larry, he would have to wait about twenty minutes for the girls to get ready. He was sure the wait was going to be worth it.
As he waited, he sauntered about the room, compulsively making sure the surroundings were perfect, with pillows perfectly in place and bottles of booze full ready to be consumed.
He examined himself in the mirror; he grinned at himself, inwardly praising his good looks of lightly tanned skin, lean muscles, and thick black hair. He smiled at his reflection, showing of perfect white teeth and attractive smile lines. The ladies at work always did coo and squirm when he smiled at him. He supposed that now that he was free, he could even get one of those bitches to jump in bed with him.
'Three at a time,' he thought wickedly, and he jumped in elation as he heard a knock at the door.
"Coming, ladies," he said smoothly, his voice chipper and full of suggestion. He turned the knob of the door and looked at them in anticipation.
His eyes widened, and he had to hold back a gasp. They were more beautiful than he even imagined!
He stepped out of the way like a gentleman and let them into his room.
"Wow, hello there, dolls. I'm Mark, and it's a pleasure to meet you." He took the blonde woman's hand into his and bent down and kissed it. She smiled wickedly at him, and then bowed her head.
"Oh, believe us," the blonde one said in a thick European accent. Her lady companions came in closer and leaned against her, snuggling suggestively. "The pleasure is all ours."
Mark felt like his heart was going to stop. He had never seen such mysterious, worldly beauties before in his life, except for on T.V. He ogled them, eyes traveling around their bodies and soaking up their curves.
The three of them were adorned almost similar, sporting long leather dusters and wearing metallic looking bodices and skirts. His eyes traveled down their legs, with black fishnet stockings intimately hugging their thighs and calves. Above knee level, they wore matching black leather boots standing on thinly pointed heels that accented their height. He could have sworn they were triplets, but the only thing different about them was their hair and faces. They may have been dressed the same, but their faces had their own unique qualities.
They all had beautiful large copper eyes, and their skin was painted with flattering thick make-up. They were positively alluring, and he felt himself go hard just standing there, eating them up with his eyes.
The dark haired one seemed impatient, and she stepped away from her friends and approached him. She pushed a digit finger into his chest, and he felt himself automatically walking backward toward the bed. He grinned goofily, locking his gaze with her. The other girls followed behind her, encircling him on all three sides of the bed. Synchronously, they shed their leather coats, and their arms were filled with different and myriad tribal tattoos.
As he gaped at them, the orange haired one giggled, and bent down over his face as she stood to his right.
She whispered very seductively, "Are you ready to get this party started?"
Immediately he nodded frantically, his mind overloaded with impending fantasies of the night.
"Well, I for one, am ready for a party," the blonde one said, resting her hands on her hips.
"Yes, as am I. A good party, with lots of action and screaming," the black haired one added. She looked at him, her lips forcing a pout. "It's too bad your wife Nancy couldn't join us."
And then suddenly his happy face paled, and he was stunned, not sure how to handle where this was going. He tried to move, but he felt dizzy, and his body felt weighted with invisible pressure.
There was an ominous sound filtering in his ear, starting low and then turning into a high frequency shriek. He winced in pain as they continued to speak.
"And what's a party without little Danny and Margaret? But children can't come to bars, and they never will be able to come to a bar. And do you know why?"
He whimpered, suddenly feeling bound to the bed when there were not chains around him. He looked the girls frantically, and he became afraid. Their once copper eyes were now molten and glowing a bright red. From behind them, the room seemed to go dark, and the pressure he felt against his body became even more unbearable, and he was having trouble breathing.
"Those poor things," the orange-haired woman said. "You killed them, didn't you? Just because you didn't want them anymore – just to keep indulging in your night life without them or anyone else bothering you. Do you know the responsibility of having children and a wife, Mr. Greenwood?"
"Ha. I don't think he does," the black-haired girl said, crossing her arms. She tipped her nose in the air and looked down at him. "And because of that, we're going to teach you a lesson."
"And take note," another one added. "You won't be learning this lesson without an audience." The blonde one stepped out of the way, and behind her he saw three forms in the shape of his family, lingering like corpses and covered in their own blood from wounds that he had caused.
He tried to scream, as the corpses sauntered closer to him, calling him "daddy" and "darling" in eerie echoing voices. They reached their hands out to him, trying to take them in. He struggled, still not budging from the pressure and his ears ringing from the deafening shrieks.
He closed his eyes, trying to shut them out, but even underneath his eyelids he saw them, the three women looking down at him in judgment and the bodies of his family clawing at him with their bony hands and smearing him with their ghost-like blood.
"You can't escape it," said the black-haired woman in the middle. The other two glared at him accusingly behind her. "You have committed a terrible crime against a mother, a woman, and your own children."
"We three Furies are the ones to pass judgment. We deem your existence cursed, and from this point on, you will feel the same pain that they felt with your mind."
"Heed our words," the blonde one said. "You sins will drive you into madness. Never again will you open your eyes without seeing the blood stains of your family on your hands." He looked down at his arms, and they were covered in stains. He desperately rubbed at them, but the color would not fade away. "Never again will you open your ears and not hear their pain, their screams as you stole their lives. It will all remind you of your most disgusting sin."
The orange-haired one smiled maliciously, with satisfaction burning in her red eyes. "You will not die today, but live a painful life from now on, suffering more than any of your fellow men until we return for you on your last day, dragging you to Tartarus."
The darkness of the void consumed him. He felt his family's bony hands reach into his chest and stab him, searching out his heart. The blood on his hands dripped and dripped all over him, soaking him in color and filling his body with pain. He looked up at the gaunt faces of his family, digging into his entrails and shrieking in their unrest. And as they screamed, he screamed with them.
They left Mark Greenwood's comatose body in the room, and they shut the door quietly behind them as they left.
Megaera then yawned, lifting up her arms and stretching herself. "Boy, sometimes I wonder if those lines are getting old. Maybe we should revise our ending speech again?"
Alecto sighed, shaking her head. "We already revised that thing fifty years ago. It's too soon. Besides, the targets are always different. They don't know the lines are overused."
"Hey, I think those lines are pretty good, actually," Tisiphone pouted, giving Megaera defensive look. "I did write them this time, after all."
"Anyway…" Alecto chimed in, stopping an argument before it could start. "Let's go find a Dunkin Donuts. I would kill for a latte."
"Me too!" Megaera chirped, jumping in her spot with anticipation in her eyes. "I've been dying for a Green Tea latte. They're new, you know."
"Yuck!" Tisiphone said, wrinkling her nose. "Sounds disgusting." And Megaera stuck her tongue at her.
Alecto smirked. "Now girls, let's enjoy this little reprieve until we have to go after the next target." She daintily covered her mouth as she began to yawn. "We gotta start fresh first thing in the morning."
Megaera and Tisiphone sighed, rolling their eyes.
"Work, work, work…Once in awhile I would like a break so I can finally see a Madonna concert. One of these days she's not going to sing anymore, and I'm going to miss it." Megaera complained.
"Not likely." Tisiphone smirked. "I have it on good authority that Aphrodite won't let that woman stop singing. She's gotta be immortal." Megaera's eyes beamed happily and she nodded in agreement.
Alecto cleared her throat and glared at her comrades as they once again deterred their conversations from work to play. "Now, come on and stop fooling around! We have to plan our strategy for the next target!"
Tisiphone grimaced and then laughed weakly. "Fine, fine. So who's next on our list of people who've sinned against humanity?"
Alecto pulled out her trusty list from her coat pocket, and looked at the next name, promptly crossing out "Mark Greenwood" before it. "Let's see… Looks like our next one is George W. Bush."
"Oh, THAT one," Tisiphone spat, wrinkling her nose. She turned to Megaera who, as usual, lacked a concerned or emotional reaction to their next target. With Green Tea lattes on the mind, she didn't even care about anything else. Tisiphone gave her bored look as Megaera blinked at them, awaiting more orders. "So, Meg, are you ready for this one?"
She nodded happily, reaching into her pocket and bringing out a brown bag. "Roger that! See? I brought the peanuts!"
Alecto crossed her arms and chuckled, and Tisiphone smirked. Megaera followed them excitedly through the exit of the bar. As they walked out of the door into the open human world, they gazed out to their surrounds, eyes glazed over with a sense of duty that had lasted thousands of years.
The weak needed vengeance, and no matter what time period it was, they would always be here to deliver it.