NOTE: Alley slash Ally is my friend. :33 She was like ‘make me like watch them.’ and I was like ‘k.’ So, yeah. Say hi to Alley. Also stuff in brackets is like. Not part of the story k.

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Artificial Euthanasia

CHAPTER THREE

I fell onto my knees, the kitten meowing in my bag. I emptied out my bag, laying the fish bones and apples onto the floor as Stonewall ran off to explore the church. I looked around, my mind was made up. Stonewall could survive without me. I wouldn’t want her dying.

Ryuutarou had the immense possibility of dying because of me. Josh was seemingly dead because of me. Confusion dominated my life and I was on a mind trip to nowhere. I had convinced myself that Josh was not really a vampire and that I’d gone insane and that’s why I thought he was. None of this could be real, and I had decided upon this. Cam’s note: oo Tsukasa’s so emo. I can’t believe I wrote this shit. D:!

Crawling back up to the window, I stood on the very edge of it. It all led up to this..? I moved my hands away from the walls, scared, but figuring it was for the best. Everybody was getting hurt because of me, and everyone that wasn’t pretty much wanted me dead. Was this really what I wanted, though? No knowing of either Josh or Ryuutarou’s fate, no settling my curiosity…? This couldn’t be what I honestly wanted. I lifted my foot up to take a step back, but I was unbalanced and toppled out of the window, back facing the ground below.

I didn’t scream, and I took no notice of the tears streaming down my face. I was going to die. I am dying.

“Tsukasa!” Josh’s arms wrapped around me before I could take notice of his yell, large wings spreading out of his back and figure once again that of which I had seen before. He was alive. He was okay.

“J-Josh…”

I suppose I was being dramatic. I thought I had no reason to live – I thought I was just ruining other people’s lives, and, apparently, I’d done so in the past. I thought Josh only saw me as a close friend and the rest of the gang only saw me as a friend, so I figured they’d be fine and better off without me there…

“What the fuck were you thinking?” Josh yelled angrily, setting me back through the window. He wiped off my wet face, his own eyes wide, worried, and damp. Blood had stopped gushing out of his chest, but his clothes were soaked in the red liquid as was much of the rest of him. But I didn’t care.

His arms wrapped tight around my neck and I stopped. Tears were falling on my shoulder, but, by then, I already knew Josh was crying. I hadn’t died, I just… almost did, so why was he crying?

I turned around in his arms, and he held me closer to his chest. I wrapped my own arms around him as his lips began to touch mine gently. His breath immediately was intoxicating and had a warm, comforting scent that mixed with his soft, moist lips. His sweat ran onto my face, but I didn’t notice. I didn’t notice much of anything. Tsukasa… is… such a loser. --;;

Josh and I slowly pulled away from each other, and fought not to exchange glances. He pulled me forward again for a brief moment, gave me a tight hug, and whispered three simple words that would, quite dramatically, change my life into my ear. “I love you.”

Josh loved me.

He loved me.

That was all I wanted…

The only thing.

Giving me a warm smile, he pulled back and lied down, looking up at the sky through the ceiling windows. He looked effervescent and in a state of bliss during these moments of silence. I could tell that he had been waiting for that kiss for a long time, and this time, I knew it wasn’t my imagination.

“Holy shit, that was hot.”

A female voice spoke and Josh and I flew onto our feet in an anything-but-gracefully manner. A girl around my height, but looking more Josh’s age, stood in front of us with short brown hair, wide from shock, blue eyes, a Korn shirt, baggy black pants with chains on them, and a soda in her left hand.

“Uhm…” I felt like a moron as I let out exasperating noises.

“I leave to get something to drink and I come back to two queers,” she paused, looking towards Stonewall, “and a cat.”

“You live in this church?” Josh asked, raising an eyebrow. If he was embarrassed, he sure didn’t show it.

“Oh, yeah… well, I mean, kinda. I’m not ‘sposed to, but no one knows, and if you get me kicked out of this place, I’m kickin’ yer arses.” She drank some of her soda. “You don’t look like you’ll, though, so I’ll just stay here and watch you make out.” The girl wiped her mouth with her arm, which was drowned with spiked bracelets along with black and grey plastic – perhaps jelly – bracelets. By the way, I’m Ally.”

Josh’s eyes widened faintly at her ‘make out’ comment, and looked towards me. This girl thought us making out was… hot? “What… the hell are you on?”

Stonewall walked over to Ally as she sat down, letting the black kitten mess around with her short hair. She then picked her up and scratched behind her ears, and Stonewall fell asleep in her arms. “She’s cute. What’s her name?”

Josh and I sat down next to each other, but Josh was more in a sideways laying down position as we looked at Ally, a bit lost.

“Oh, I’m Tsukasa, and that’s Josh,” I begun, looking towards Josh, then back at Ally. “Uh, she’s Stonewall. I found her when I was leaving London and she just kind of… came along,” I explained, leaving out the details as Ally put Stonewall woke back up and Ally put her down. The kitten walked over to the bag and fell asleep curled up on it.

“Yer from London? What’re you doin’ here?”

Before I could tell her, Josh spoke up instead. “Oh, you know, just visiting a church,” he joked. I laughed faintly and put my hand on his head, messing up his hair like he used to do to mine.

I think he forgot Ally was there for that moment, because he sat up, pinned me to the ground, and messed up my hair with a laugh. He looked at Ally and coughed, sitting back up.

“Do you mind if we spent the night here?” Josh asked with a yawn as the setting sun peered through the ceiling windows.

“Nah. Goin’ back to London?” Ally took off her bracelets and laid them on a chest in the corner of the room.

“I’m not sure. Tsukasa here has a few stalkers that keep trying to kill him.”

“Wait, a few stalkers, Josh?” I asked, confused.

“Uh, yeah, about that.” Josh took off his shirt, and I remembered I wasn’t wearing one myself, and suddenly felt cold. I grabbed my arms and shivered a bit as Josh turned around. A large, bloody gash stretched across his back, and my eyes widened.

“Josh…”

“There’s more... I guess… Ryuu… wasn’t enough. They’re all trying to find you,” Josh explained. He pulled his shirt over my head and put it on me and I responded with hugging him.

I’d dreamt of a time like this, where I could finally be with Josh. I’ve waited for the time where I could hug him or cuddle him or something and I wouldn’t have to worry about being completely embarrassed. I was fine in front of Ally, since she obviously thought that homosexuals were the best thing since peanut butter.

“Do you have any peroxide and some cloth?” I inquired, turning towards Ally.

“No, but there’s a thrift shop nearby and a pharmacy next door to it – I’ll go get some. I’ll be right back,” Ally uttered, standing up and leaving the room. I could hear her walk down the stairs and then leave the church. Once I heard the door close, I turned back to Josh.

“How’s Ryuu?”

“David drove by and brought him to the hospital. The doctor said…,” Josh paused, looking as if he was going to cry. “He said the chances of Ryuu living is slim… The man shot him in both his arm and his chest... He said Ryuu had to fight back for that much damage… He was all… bruised and...”

“If he dies, it’s my fault.” I stared at the ground, suppressing my emotions or else I’d sink back into my whole depression state, which almost cost me my life earlier that day.

“No, Tsukasa… It’s… It’s not like that.”

“You know, if you would have just let me die six months ago, Ryuu would be alive, you wouldn’t have your back torn to pieces, and you wouldn’t have to lie to the gang about me.”

Josh leaned on me. “Aww, but then I’d have no fourteen-year-old to flirt with and be gay with,” he laughed, pushing me over. I raised an eyebrow and kicked him gently with a laugh. He fell over and grinned mischievously before tackling me and pinning me to the floor. Josh was stronger, taller, and older than I was. He was always able to pin me.

I laughed, trying to push him off fruitlessly.

“Wow. I need to stop leaving you guys alone together. Either that or I need to keep a video camera somewhere in here.”

Josh rolled off me and we sat up. Ally had returned without us knowing, and she set the peroxide and white cloth down next to me. “I’m going to go grab something for us to eat real quickly,” she murmured, walking back towards the door. “Don’t do anything sexy and gay until I get back. It’s no fun if I can’t see,” she said seriously, but she was obviously joking – I hope. Ally shut the door to the room we were in, unlike last time, and left.

Blushing emotionally, I brushed some dirt off of Josh’s shirt he had put on me before tearing off a piece of cloth and going downstairs to try to find someway to get it wet. There was a faucet on the second floor.

I sat down behind Josh and wiped off the smeared blood before wiping around the wound with peroxide. I carefully applied peroxide to the spots that weren’t open, and then wiped off the blood that was being oozed out disturbingly.

Josh cringed. “Ow.”

“Would you rather be doing this?”

“Yes.”

“Oh, well… so would I. Wrong point. Just be still for a moment.”

I wrapped the cloth around his back, his chest and stomach completely covered with cloth. The blood was beginning to seep through the back, so I used the rest of it to double-layer it. “There.”

Josh yawned, laying down on his side and looking at me. “So, find out anything knew? Like… why those guys are stalking you and trying to murder you in the most painful way possible?”

I crawled behind Josh and lied on top of his sideways chest with a sigh. “I don’t know… he said…”

“What’d he say?”

“‘Thanks for making me a murderer, to kill a murderer.’ I feel like I’m in a damn soap opera.”

Josh’s teeth clenched tightly for a moment. “I hate it when people think being all mysterious and cool,” he grumbled. “Don’t believe him – everyone has their different views on things. Big… differences… And what is so soap opera-y about this – and why would you know?”

I ignored his last remark. “You know how those go. Some girl is like, ‘Oh, woe is me. I’m going to die for absolutely no actual reason. Then the hero will come and save me and we’ll make out a whole night, then we’ll fall madly in love and he’ll save me over and over.’”

“So, does that mean we can make out all tonight?”

I looked at Josh curiously. I couldn’t tell if he was serious or joking, and his face told me nothing. So I figured I’d just go along with it. “It depends, I think we might need an extra night for that,” I laughed, and Josh tittered a bit as well.

“Seriously, though, don’t worry. Sure, I’ve saved your arse b’fore, but you saved mine before, if you can’t remember, and many more times than I’ve saved yours.”

Pausing, I was reminiscing for a few moments. I had saved Josh’s life before, but I guess I never really thought of it. I smiled faintly, looking back at Josh. “That’s because you wake up and I swear the brill thought pops into your head, ‘Oh, I think I’ll go run in front of a car today! How about getting caught in the middle of a store robbery twice, instead? Perhaps I’ll tick some taggers off so they’ll put a gun to my head!’” I mocked with a good-natured snicker.

“Hey, watch it,” said Josh, but at that moment, Ally walked in with some candy bars. She tossed them on the floor in front of us and I crawled off Josh to sit down next to him. He sat up as well.

“Pop,” I started to speak, but Josh caught me off guard.

“Soda – not pop. Soda, soda, soda.” Josh nudged me, smirking mockingly.

“Po-,” I paused, grinning at Josh before looking back to Ally. “Soda and candy bars?” I asked, laughing faintly.

Unfortunately, Ally threw a candy bar at me and it landed into my mouth with the wrapper still on. Gee, what were the odds? “Shut up and eat,” she mocked comically.

A yawn emitted from me as I twitched in my sleep, lying in next to Josh. Sometime during my sleep, he had put his arms around my neck, and that was how I lie now.

I could have told that Josh wasn’t having a very good dream from the way he was twitching and holding me tighter. During my slumber, I wasn’t aware of what I was doing.