Some girls like boys

We call them straight

Some girls like girls

We call them lesbians

And then there are the girls who like boys

With long, flowing locks of gold

And big, puppy dog blue eyes, with lashes thicker than my nausea

Full, pouty, achingly kissable lips

And graceful, hourglass backs

Hips that sway as they walk

With perfect, hairless legs

And pointed ears

They call her a heterosexual drag hag

I tell her that I know just the boy for her

Penis sold separately