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Tanner passed through the gate of Lügen without incident a few days later and finally let himself breath easier; he was safe from any retribution that the government of Lügen could offer up in response to the murders he’d so recently committed on their soil. He cast those troubling thoughts from his mind and pushed his exhausted horse hard as he rode down the trail towards where he and Faye had set up camp nearly a week and a half earlier, desperate to see a friendly face after being alone for so long. He wasn’t big on being alone and never had been.
He arrived at the campsite a few hours later, his poor horse limping and panting with exertion. When Tanner’s green eyes landed up on Faye all of his own exhaustion fled from him. He jumped off his mount and ran over to her. He swept her up into his arms and spun her around. Then Tanner kissed her gently and smiled. “I’ve missed you,” he whispered as he lowered her to the grassy ground again.
Faye returned his smile, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. She could sense that something was off. “And I you,” she replied before launching into the issue that had long been on her mind. “What did you find?” she asked anxiously.
Tanner sighed and dropped his eyes, which was a clear indication to Faye that things had not gone well at all. She grabbed his hands before he could speak. “Tell me!” she screamed as fear laced its icy fingers around her heart.
Tanner looked back up at her again, his green eyes covered with a thin film of moisture, and shifted his hands so that he was now the one doing the holding. “Faye, Pepin was already days dead by the time I arrived. There was nothing I could do,” he answered reluctantly. He didn’t want to hurt her, but he knew that not revealing the information would be just as troubling. Sometimes knowing brought with it some closure. He just hoped that was what would happen with Faye because she truly did deserve more than she’d been given by this life.
Faye’s blue eyes widened for a brief second before rolling up into her head. She collapsed into Tanner’s arms as the shock of hearing that the one person she had truly understood and who had truly understand her was dead—gone forever.
Tanner caught her and carried her over to her bedroll. He gently laid her down and brushed off a few errant strands of hair from her pale face. He wished that there had been some better way to tell her about what had happened, but he knew that there wasn’t. Talking about death was never an easy thing. “I’m so sorry, Faye,” Tanner muttered and traced the outline of her face with a finger.
Faye woke after a few long moments and blinked past the tears that had blinded her. “Did it happen like I feared?” she whispered, the guilt of Pepin’s death pounding at her temples.
Tanner nodded and grabbed her hand. “Faye, you had no part in what occurred,” he whispered, somehow sensing that she was on the cusp of blaming herself or Pepin’s murder.
“But I did! I stopped you from killing them and that led to his death, pure and simple!” she cried and sat up, clutching at Tanner’s hand as if searching for some kind of lifeline.
“Well, no matter now because they are dead. The two that survived their misplaced attack on us were murdered in the city a few days ago,” Tanner replied vaguely, not sure if he wanted to claim credit yet.
“What? How?” Faye gasped, half pleased by the news of their deaths, but the knowledge of the damage that had already been done kept her from being truly happy about any of it. Pepin was dead and there was no changing that or her hand in his murder no matter how indirect it had been.
Tanner held her gaze, knowing that to not do so would be stupid. He sighed. “I returned to Riordan after I found and buried Pepin’s body and killed them. It was the only thing I could think of doing and despite our past differences, it was what Pepin deserved. Someone had to extract vengeance for his wrongful death, and I didn’t want you to get in harms way to do it yourself,” Tanner explained.
Silence fell between them for a moment as Faye let herself absorb the whole situation. “Pepin’s gone,” she whispered, her heartbreak and pain obvious in the very tone of her voice. Seconds after those words were uttered, tears began to stream down her face unchecked.
Tanner released her hands and framed her face. “Faye, it will be all right,” he tried to comfort her without fully understanding what it was that was so completely devastating.
Faye shook her head. “Things will never be the same, Tanner.”
Tanner stared at her in surprise for a moment before a light went on in his head. “You truly loved him, didn’t you?” he questioned, but kept his tone even despite the jealously he felt. Pepin was dead and there was no reason to be jealous any longer anyway.
Faye’s blue eyes widened in shock; she hadn’t anticipated Tanner discovering the source of her discomfort so completely. After a moment’s scrutiny she nodded; lying wouldn’t get her anywhere anymore. Pepin was gone and the only source of comfort she had left was Tanner, and she didn’t want to cast him away unless he gave her good reason. She needed someone. Being alone in the world wasn’t something she was too keen on anymore; Pepin had changed her perspective on life and there was no going back now.
“I think I’ve known that for awhile now,” Tanner whispered as if mulling over the whole issue. He looked at Faye’s face and felt as if he truly understood a crucial part of the woman before him for the first time since he’d met her. He lifted her chin with one of his hands and kissed her gently. “I understand, Faye. He was always there for you. He listened when no one else would.”
Faye nodded through her tears, awed by the transformation that Tanner seemed to be undergoing right before her eyes.
He kissed her again and leaned back. Tanner gave her a small smile. “If that is what you need then I’m just going to have to try to fill that gap in your life. I don’t want to lose you, Faye.”
Faye threw her arms around his neck and buried her face against his strong chest. “I do love you, Tanner. It will just take time to move past what’s happen. Pepin was unlike anyone I’ve ever met before. He cared about me, and that’s a feat that no one but my mother has ever managed. I need time.”
Tanner nodded and rested his head against her head of blonde hair as he wrapped his arms around her. “I’ll give you whatever you need as long as you don’t try to push me away. I’m alone now too and it’s not a fun place to be,” he whispered.
Faye let the tears take her completely then and eventually cried herself to sleep in Tanner’s arms.
Tanner held her through the night, giving her what strength he could because in his heart he knew that she’d just lost her most important anchor to the world. She was right in saying that she needed time, and Tanner was willing to accommodate.
Faye woke the next morning feeling as if she’d continued to cry even in her sleep. Her eyes were red and painful and her whole face felt swollen, but she blinked past the discomfort and looked at the trees surrounding their campsite, longing for some glimpse of beauty despite her heartache. A few moments passed before she became aware of what she was using as her pillow. She lifted her head a few inches and looked down at Tanner’s sleeping face and allowed herself a small smile. Maybe not all was lost. “Tanner,” she whispered.
Tanner’s green eyes opened in surprise, but he relaxed when he saw Faye’s face looking down upon him. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep,” he muttered, slowly regaining his bearings.
“That’s all right,” Faye murmured and laid her head back down upon his chest. For the first time she truly felt safe with Tanner, and she silently marveled at the feeling.
Tanner smiled to himself and wrapped his arms around her as he shifted into a sitting position. “How are you doing?”
“I’ll be okay eventually. I just need time. Pepin meant a lot to me despite the short time we had together,” Faye replied and closed her eyes against the threatening tears. She had to be strong and she would get through this, but she would never let herself forget Pepin’s kindness. Of all the people in Lügen he should’ve been the one to live; he deserved happiness, not death. Faye only hoped that he was content in the after life.
Tanner ran a hand down her mussed braid and kissed the top of her head. “Take all the time you need, Faye. We can wait.”
“What are your plans now, Tanner?” Faye asked one evening as they sat around their campfire.
Tanner raised an eyebrow and smiled at her. “My plans? Don’t you mean our plans?” he taunted lightly.
Faye shrugged and gave him an indifferent look. “I don’t really know yet. We haven’t talked much lately and I’m just not up to arguing,” she replied.
“Well, I’m no longer a welcomed face in Lügen since I killed those two so going back is out of the question, but I somehow doubt that that fact disturbs you much. I get the feeling that it’s been your plan all along to get out of Lügen.”
“Aren’t you perceptive?” Faye countered with a spark of her old spirit.
Tanner nodded. “That I am. Would you care to share anything else of importance with me?”
The small smile that had crossed Faye’s face disappeared. “I don’t know, Tanner. How much are you willing to accept about me?”
Tanner leaned forward and kissed her. “Quite a bit actually,” he whispered, his face only inches from hers.
Faye shrugged and took his hand, keeping him from moving too far away from her. She wanted him close for this, and with that settled she launched into an explanation that she had once given Pepin, telling Tanner of her past and then finally of her ability. All the while she prayed to Pepin that Tanner would accept her for who she was and not turn her away. She didn’t think she could bear rejection now when she was more aware of the pain of loneliness than ever before.
Tanner’s face registered shock as she finished with a brief explanation about her telekinesis and the true motivation that she had for leaving Lügen. He really didn’t know what to think. He’d long seen Faye as a stubborn woman without any special attributes aside from an amazing ability to change people’s minds, but not it turned out that she had one of the powers that the government of Lügen had long deemed evil. “What can you do?” he whispered, terrified and intrigued all at the same time.
Faye lifted their bedrolls into the air with her telekinesis and then lowered them. “It was this ability that saved me from that friend of yours all those weeks ago,” she whispered.
Tanner nodded numbly and then tightened his hold on her hand. “This doesn’t change who you are, does it?” he asked, unsure of what those in Lügen had said was true and what was false.
Faye shook her head. “No. It’s just a little something extra that I can do; that’s all. I’m still me, Tanner.”
“So your objective this whole time was to obtain freedom?” Tanner asked, not entirely sure what to make of the concept. He’d never thought much of what it would be like to live outside of Lügen until living within its borders was no longer an option for him.
“Yes. I was sick of being oppressed because I was a woman and for hiding my ability in fear of a swift death. No one deserves to live like that, and I was just one of the few who realized that. Pepin was another, but he never got to live to see better times,” she finished softly.
Tanner pulled her into a hug and sighed. “I won’t leave you, Faye, if that’s what you fear. Everything will take time to work out, but I’m willing to give it that time if you are.”
Faye looked up at him and smiled. “Of course I am,” she whispered and was silent for a moment. “We have all the time in the world now.”
“I suppose that’s because we’re free?” Tanner asked with a soft laugh, meaning his words as a joke.
“That’s right. No one will dictate our lives any longer. We’re free, Tanner,” Faye replied, taking his words in all seriousness because that was exactly how she felt. She had time now to do with her life what she deemed fit and no one was going to tell her otherwise. Faye cast her gaze up to the sky as the last vestiges of light disappeared and silently thanked Pepin for giving her this chance. He had saved her life and given his own in the process and that was a sacrifice she would never forget for freedom always bore its own price.
The End
