To hide myself away—would that be best?
To not endure each trial and test—
To pretend you don’t have this hold on me—
And I don’t feel this misery!

Cloister myself—remain behind closed doors—
Whispers of voices through walls and floors;
Taunting, teasing, beckoning me—
Holding—calling—breaking free!

Solitude is a truer friend—
Than standing in a crowd to pretend;
Or hiding myself in a crowd of few—
Putting forth a “truth” that isn’t true!

Holding up a wall that cannot be breached—
Is better than letting my soul be seen;
And better than letting my heart be touched—
Because it hurts me far too much!

I’ll hide myself away—don’t search for me—
I’d come outside if I wanted to be seen!

Chantrea Johari
01 November 2005