Mine

My comfort.
My shelter.
My pain.
My anger.

They are everything.
All I have
That's real.
Mine alone to make,
To carry,
To bear.

My secret.
My addiction.
My need.
My hunger.

I abuse myself,
I abuse You.
Jesus I have to.
It's all I have.
They are everything.

No one can understand,
I don't understand.
I just know
How I feel.
How they make me feel.
That's what they do.
They make me feel.

It's what I need,
What I want.
I am addicted to feeling something.
It may be hell,
But it's still something.

My comfort.
My shelter.
My pain.
My anger.

I smile,
I laugh,
Look happy,
Fake it as much as I like.

But those beautiful,
Heart-wrenching,
Truthful
Feelings are mine.

My everything.

My scars.