Why I Would Never Know

When did it start? When did these ideas fill my head? Were they just excuses? Excuses for being so incompetent? When did my emotions come into play? Was it right? Did I weigh everything correctly? Every option? Every consequence? Do I see the product clearly? Is the end crystal clear? What would happen if I didn’t do it?

When I think about it, where it started, I was just a hatchling. A toddler on the grand cosmic scale we call time. Sure I was a teenager but that’s just a small tick on the scale. I had always listened to the news. I listened to the deaths being tolled across the world. I listened to the wars that raged endlessly. I listened to false promises that politicians give just so they can make a lot of money. I never really had a lot of friends back then either. Maybe it was because I was mostly introverted that caused me to think like this? To not care at all for individuals?

One fateful night, I opened up my textbook and started work on my science. I was studying the impact humans have on the environment and how it works. An example was given about hawks, mice and grain. The mice live in a grain field where they munch on the grain provided to them. Hawks hunt them down and help to control the population. If there was no hawk, the mice would grow in population. Their main source of food is outnumbered by the vast population of their consumer. The grain runs dry and the mice starve. I applied this to our world.

Humans are so huge in population and we’ve taken measure to protect ourselves from that big hawk in the sky. We’re all scared little mice. Intelligent mice at that! Is our intelligence a gift or a curse I wonder? We’re outnumbering our resources! When I realized this I was shocked. I was shocked that nobody has ever talked about this publicly. Sure we are concerned about the raising number of drug users and drug dealers. Not to mention poverty, war and disease. No matter how much we loathe them, we should really be thanking them. Loving them, embracing them! They help to control our population and to prevent it from growing even larger.

I like to think of it as this. We are mice living in domes. We are drowning in these domes filled with different diseases, gases and sin. I step out of the dome and gaze at the world around me when all of a sudden I am snatched up by a hawk. Fighting the hawk off and squirming out of the tight talons I fall to the ground landing safely. My mind though is racing. What had I seen outside of my dome? A dead world. I returned to my dome a changed mouse. A mouse plagued by the thoughts of death and life. Was what we were doing right? Were we all joined together by a common greed? A greed to live?

So I kept thinking about it. My childhood, my social life, anything that meant everything to a normal teenager was at the bottom of my priority list. I could only think the thought that if future generations will die of hunger because we didn’t do a thing. That we committed the deadly sins of gluttony, greed and envy. I could only think that no one would ever have the mind to consider the consequences of those acts of sin!

Except me.

Was this my destiny? Was this what I was put on Earth to do? To make the human population right again? But how would I do that? Surely talks of the subject would go unheard or dismissed as ludicrous. They did the same thing with Galileo. Would I end up just being a martyr? I don’t want to be a martyr! I want to change this word so that we endure for more ages. Would there be others to join me or am I all alone?

The saying goes, in order to make an omelette you have to break a few eggs. Another saying also says in order to rebuild a badly built building, you have to tear the old one down to its foundations. The human race this time around failed. Failed to grasp what they needed to grasp in the first place! So could one enlightened human break these eggs and make a new omelette? Could I tear down the badly built building and build a new foundation?

God did it once when he asked Noah to escape the great flood. Zeus and Hermes of Greek Mythology repaid Philemon’s and Baucis’s generosity and let them live throughout the washout of human sin. Mankind has written stories like these into their religion, as if they knew it was to happen or already has. So why aren’t they suddenly realizing that it’s going to happen? And that...a human was going to cause it?

I secluded myself away from the world. Moved away from my family, got a job with minimum wage and devised my plan. The only channel set to my tv was the news. I had to learn more about the military, learn more about the resources I needed to ready my plan. Not to mention I needed to build my own rebellion.

I entered in the military and studied long and hard in it. I met people who like myself, felt that the world was just not worth living in. We all made a pact then, to change the world and restore it to its former glory.

We immediately faked our deaths. No trace of us was found. We had disappeared, able to form our plans without disturbance. We estimated that at least three quarters of the world’s population would need to be eliminated in order to restore it to its former glory. Were we insane? Crazy? I don’t know. If there is a force out there though, causing all of these pandemics we would be saving lives right? And if this force did not exist, the global warming would lessen. We would wipe out the entire car industry and live things the old way.

The world knows of us now though after we showed ourselves. They branded us enemies, crazy individuals, terrorists and many other names. Our name though is Regiment 7, our plan is to return the world to its womb. Our codename is Operation Ragnarok. Will we be saviours later on in history? Or will we be religious fanatics? Are we doing the right thing? Or are we being too fast in our actions?

I wonder sometimes...Is it nature’s law that the hero will win? Or is it just luck in skill? Is it he who has the most support or he who stands alone in a world of sin? I will never know. No one is there to answer me. My compassion for humanity contradicts my hatred to them. No one is there to comfort me on the eve of the new era of humanity. I stand alone with my comrades. We will never know.

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A/N: I thought I'd give you all a kind of preface to my soon to come story Default. A little taste of what's to come.