Chapter Nine: Questions and Answers

“So how was your day?” Tony asked calmly, while staring at me intently as if he was trying to read my mind.

We had been sitting in the park for almost two minutes of silence before Tony spoke. For those two minutes I thought about all the places I could be instead of here. And for some reason, part of me was actually excited to be here even though I was scared to death about how this soon to be conversation could go.

“It was fine, I guess. I mean, it was normal so therefore my day should have been fine, right?” I asked. I knew I really wasn’t making any sense but when I was nervous it was almost impossible for me to talk normally to anyone. Not like I ever actually did speak normally to anyone. It was just extra hard when I was nervous.

“That’s good. So you like me?” Tony smiled and stared and leaned back against the tree trunk.

“What?” I asked, dumbfounded. Why was he being so blunt? That was seriously unacceptable. Does he really think I’m going to answer all nonchalant like? Does he even know me? I’m about two seconds from curling up in a ball and dying.

“That’s not an answer. You would think someone as articulate as you would say something other than what.” Tony laughed, shaking his head a little. His hair almost looked slightly blue when the sun was shining down on it. “So, I’ll ask one more time, do you like me?”

“How would you like me to answer,” I asked. “So I don’t have to make a fool out of myself.”

“I think you’re kind of doing a good job of that already. It’s really not that hard of a question, Benjamin. It’s pretty simple really. You either answer yes or no.”

“If I was a girl and this was a 30s movie I would have slapped you for that comment.”

“Well then I’m extra happy that you’re not a girl. I might have to rethink my sexuality.”

I almost laughed. I couldn’t laugh though because that would really ruin the mood. The mood being I was annoyed and he was being an ass, a sort of cute ass, but an ass nonetheless. It was almost dark out but the sun was still peaking out behind the hills. It was just bright enough to see Tony’s hair shining and the objects around us in the park.

I composed myself and said: “Very funny.”

“I’m glad you thought so,” Tony said. “Now how long is it going to take for you to answer? Because I’m getting kind of hungry.”

“You think this whole thing is just one big joke, don’t you?” I asked, glaring at Tony who was still smiling like an idiot.

“Not particularly. I do find it quite amusing though. I think you would too if you weren’t yourself.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked defensively.

“You’re too serious, Benjamin. The world won’t explode if you just let go once in a while.”

I absolutely hated it when people told me that. I’m not stupid, I know the world won’t explode if I let go once in a while, but it’s not that simple. It’s like telling a penguin the world won’t explode if you fly. That’s lovely and all, but the penguin still can’t fly. Just like I can’t magically ‘let go’. I didn’t tell Tony this because I really didn’t want to sound like an ass if he actually did like me.

“Ha. Ha,” I responded, while keeping all other snarky comments to myself. “Do you want to go to dinner?” I asked.

I really have no idea why I asked that. I was hungry and he was hungry, but that was still beside the point. I don’t ask people to dinner.

Tony smiled, showing his annoyingly white teeth. “Are you asking me out on a date?”

“No, you moron,” what the hell is with me? It’s like word vomit or something, “we’re both hungry, so we should eat. It’s just logic; it’s not a date.”

“Whatever you say, madam.” Tony stood up and then extended his arm out to help me up. I took his hand and gracefully got up and then slapped him on the arm.

“What was that for?” he asked, looking pseudo offended.

“You disserved it. If you keep this up, I won’t answer your question.” I started walking a few steps ahead of him, then turned around and asked: “So where do you want to go?”

“Anywhere with food. I’m not picky,” he said. “Except I really don’t like pizza, Mexican food, pasta, Chinese food or lasagna,” he explained, while making a disgusted face.

Who seriously hates Mexican or Chinese food? They’re the two most delicious types of food, in my opinion, which at this point in time was the only one that mattered.

“Are you sure you’re not picky?” I asked, deciding not to make a huge deal about his horrible distaste in food.

“I’m quite sure. Oh, and I’m also a vegetarian.” He smiled.

“You’re insane,” I said.

“Because I’m a vegetarian?” he asked.

“No, because you’re you. You’re an ex-blue haired, smoking vegetarian and that makes you insane,” I explained.

“Your logic is flawless.”

“I know it is. So where do you want to eat?”

We ended up eating at a vegetarian restaurant in the city I had never heard about. It was nice enough, I guess. I had a strange craving for meat halfway through the meal but besides that it was fine. Although, I sort of think the craving for meat was actually a cover up for my nervousness.

“Benjamin, you do know lettuce can’t die, right? No matter how many times you stab it nothing’s going to happen.”

Okay, so I was really nervous, but you can’t blame me. I’ve never been in this situation before. This was almost a pseudo date, in a way and the closest thing I’ve ever come to being on a date before was a third grade birthday party for this girl who’s name I don’t even remember.

Yes, I’m well aware that that’s a very sad fact.

“I’m not trying to kill my lettuce,” I said. “I’m trying to soften it up. It’s kind of hard.”

Worst excuse ever.

Tony didn’t even respond. He just looked up at me and looked back down at his half empty plate. This was not going so well. I put down my knife and sighed. This was stupid. I had nothing to be nervous about. It was obvious Tony at least sort of liked me, unless of course, he was a sadistic bastard who took great pleasure in breaking the hearts of guys newly introduced to the fact that they were gay. I kind of doubted that but it was still a possibility. I mean, if the nicest looking guys can end up being serial killers than it’s not too impossible for Tony to be Mr. Gay Heartbreaker, right?

This has just gone past stupid and landed at outrageous. I just sort of compared Tony to a serial killer and I have an urge to pick up my knife again and continue stabbing the lettuce. I needed to put an end to this.

“Tony.”

One word down and a few more to go, dear god, I was going to pass out.

“Yes?” He looked up from his food and stared at me looking quite interested.

This was good. I think.

“Are you a serial killer?” I asked.

I mentally slapped myself.

“Um, no,” he responded.

“Oh, good,” I said. “That would be kind of awful.”

“Yes, I suppose it would.”

This was too awkward. He knew it and I knew it. All I could really do was stare at his hair, which I noticed was turning blue again. Apparently his hair died wasn’t permanent. While thinking of his blue hair I was reminded of when I first met him. I remembered his lip ring, which even out of school was still absent. He looked so much different with the lip ring. I kind of missed it even though I had only seen him with it in once.

For some reason thinking about that calmed me down enough where I could speak again and not make a complete ass out of myself.

“What happened to your lip ring?” I asked.

This was good. Normal conversation.

“You noticed?” Tony looked amused. “I got bored of it. Plus, I hated not being able to wear it at school. Wearing the spacers instead got annoying. I think I’m going to get a nose ring after high school.”

“Oh, okay. A nose ring would look good on you.”

I was being truthful. His nose was sort of crooked in that adorable way where a nose ring would look perfect. Or, at least I thought so.

“Really? Thanks.” He looked pleased. This was good.

Tony pulled his arm up and ran his fingers through his hair in that nervous habit sort of way. I didn’t panic; I knew he was most likely thinking the same thing as me.

Who was going to say it first?

I decided I was.

“Hey, Tony? I really liked you.” My eyes dropped to the table. I stared intently at my massacred lettuce, which was piled around my half eaten sandwich.

Tony smiled. “I figured as much. I like you, too.”

I was happy, and a little envious. He said it so calm and collected. I, on the other hand, probably had the most high pitch voice. I’m surprised he could even understand what I was saying, but this all didn’t matter. He did understand it and that was fantastic. Plus, this wasn’t a pseudo date anymore. It was the real thing.