Welcome to the Greyzone. This is a place of love and hate. Of friendship and hostility. Of peace, of war, of calmness, of fighting. This is a place of people, of the emotions, the experiences, the histories they are made of. This is a place of hope for a better future. This is a place where some dreams become reality and some are trod down into the dust. This place isn’t so different from any other place on earth, after all.

Welcome to the Greyzone. Now farewell. Close the door after you when you leave.

Chapter 17 - Where It Ends

This is the beginning, what should have been the beginning. Alex MacKenzie came here as a first step in search for a better future and found out that the world was a whole lot more complicated than he could ever have imagined.

He feels like a child, a stupid, ignorant child, who knew nothing and learned too much he didn’t want to know.

Alex killed Lynne. He didn’t hold the gun, but he could just as well have had. And now he might have killed the entire Greyzone in the process.

There can’t be victory without sacrifices, that’s what Amos Zimmer used to say back when Alex first joined the Opposition. This time, it feels like there has been so many sacrifices that the victory doesn’t matter at all.

He asked Ruth if they will pull this through, if they will make it out. She didn’t know. She has set everything up for as soon as they cross over the border of the zone. But how to get there is a completely different story.

Takedo leads them down into a cellar of a house close to the wall. It’s cold, there are small furry things scurrying into the corners as they flash their lights into the darkness. Along the cinderblock walls there are crates, boxes, sacks. Takedo’s little smuggler’s cave.

“I had no chance to get hold of my usual contacts”, says Takedo. “We’re too short on time. I haven’t worked with these new guards before. It’s a risk.”

“It’s a risk we’re going to have to take”, says Chris. “Division might be here any time. The longer we stay, the more danger for the Dive.”

Takedo doesn’t answer to that. He walks over to a low steel door, sticks a key in the lock and turns it around. The lock opens with a little click, and the door swings up. There is only darkness behind it.

“Down there”, says Takedo. “Then through the tunnels. When you reach ground level, blink your flashlight three times. You’ll get an answer from the guard tower. Then you go over the border, two at the time. Got it?”

“We got it, Takedo”, says K.C., who is going to take them to the Outside. Why, Alex doesn’t know, and he doesn’t dare to ask. He has a feeling that he’s not K.C. Davis’ favourite person right now.

Takedo nods. “Good luck”, he says, and then to Chris, “Take care of yourself.”

“You too”, says Chris. “Say goodbye to Misha for me, will you? Tell him… tell him I’m sorry. I left the guitar for him. Maybe he’ll find someone else who knows how to play.”

“Maybe”, says Takedo. To K.C. he says: “Come back.”

“I’m coming back, don’t you worry”, says K.C. “I’m just gonna see them safely to the Outside, then I’m coming back and we’ll sort out the rest of the mess.”

She pats him on the shoulder, and then she takes her flashlight and dives headfirst into the darkness. The rest of them follows, only Takedo stays in the cellar, and closes the door after them.

There’s a stair inside, only a few steps, and then the ground is damp and muddy. There are all kinds of debris in the way, and they have to walk slowly not to loose their footing in the blackness. Alex would feel better if he could see further than his own hand in front of him. He always had a tendency for claustrophobia, and right now there is too many tons of concrete and metal over his head.

K.C. walks up front. It seems like she’s travelled this way before. Chris makes the rearguard, and Alex and Ruth walk in the middle, like they are some kind of prisoners that needs to be guarded. On second thought, the comparison is not that bad. If Alex were a Diver, he wouldn’t trust any of them. Outsiders coming to make trouble.

He feels bad for Ruth, who’s only been doing her job, what her father told her to do. And he knows that Ruth feels bad as well, even if she holds up a strong façade. Alex doesn’t know how long she has lived in the Greyzone, but it’s long enough to make friends, make connections. Make a life.

It feels bad to leave Lynne behind. Dead.

He still can’t grasp it completely. He half expects her to be coming round the next corner, that little frown on her face, asking him why he didn’t waited for her. Life without Lynne is going to be empty.

No victory without sacrifices.

An evil little voice in the back of Alex’ head is asking him if maybe that was what Goldman changed in Lynne’s programming. Maybe he put in that little order; that she had to protect Ruth Zimmer with her life. What kind of choice is that?

Cyber agents have no choices. They are, and have always been, property. Machines. Tools.

Means to an end.

That has to change. Alex is firmly resolved to make it so. A soon as they get out of this stinking tunnel and over the border, as soon as he gets face to face with Zimmer and Goldman again, he’s going to stand them against the wall and demand that they do something about the cybers and their place in society. As soon as he’s punched them both in the face of course.

Something’s happening. They’re reaching the end of the tunnel, and there’s light trickling in around the edges of another door.

“Turn off the flashlights”, says K.C. They all comply. She reaches out, opens the door slowly. Alex’ heart beats a frantic tattoo against his ribcage. There could be government soldiers on the other side.

But there aren’t. There’s only cold night air, a dark grey sky, and a chain link fence with barbed wire on top. Right here, there’s a hole in the fence, a cleverly concealed opening, just wide enough for a person to get through.

The nearest guard tower is only a few feet away. There are large searchlights, throwing wide pale circles on the ground. For some reason, the snow outside the Dive is white, pristine, untouched. Sterile.

“There”, says Ruth, pointing towards a dark van in the distance. “That’s our people, just like we planned.”

“Let’s get you over there then”, says K.C., not meeting the other woman’s eyes. Since Ruth revealed her true name, that’s the first thing K.C. has said to her.

K.C. takes her flashlight out, points it towards the tower, and blinks it three times. There’s a pause, that somehow feels just a moment too long, or maybe that’s just Alex’ imagination. Then, a light in the tower window blinks three times in return. K.C. nods to herself.

“All right. MacKenzie and Ruth…or whatever the fuck your name is. You two first. Hurry up.”

They look at each other, makes themselves ready to run. Then, Alex feels Chris’ hand on his arm, and something is pressed into his coat pocket.

“What…” he begins and puts his hand in the pocket, just to feel the familiar shape of Chris’ cyberpack.

“That’s everything in there, Alex”, says Chris, locking his eyes and holding them fast. “Everything, understand? Use it wisely.”

And Alex understands, fingering the metal in his pocket like it was the most precious thing in the world. In a way it is. The entire contents of Chris’ mind. All his memories. All the data. The future of the European Union lies in his hand.

“I won’t need to use this”, he says. “I’ll see you on the other side in just a moment.”

“Just in case”, says Chris, and then he gives Alex a little shove. “Go on.”

Alex takes a last look back. Then he grabs Ruth’s hand, breaks through the hole in the fence, and they both start to run, over the open area on the other side in the fence, and towards the waiting safety of the black van.

&&&

“There they go”, says K.C. “Sure you don’t want to stay, see it through.”

Chris follows Alex and Ale…Ruth with his eyes as they move over the snow. This far, everything looks like it’s going to go according to plans. And he has to keep to that plan as well. “I want to stay”, he says. “But it’ll be easier for you with me gone.”

“Easier for the Dive, maybe”, says K.C., her mouth quirking into a sardonic little smile. “I’m gonna miss you, Chapelle. Don’t do anything stupid now. Like getting yourself killed or something.”

“I’ll do my best”, says Chris. Then he pulls her into a hard hug, as always surprised over how short she actually is. Her forehead only reaches his chest. “Thanks for everything, Cee. You saved my life.”

“Maybe you saved a little bit of mine too”, says K.C., and then she pushes him away, smiling. “Get going now, before I start cryin’ or some sappy shit like it.”

He doesn’t tell her that there is already a wet trail running down her cheek. He presses his lips against her forehead, and then pushes through the fence, out on the other side.

One last look back, where she stands in the snow, and he can’t even bring himself to wave. “Bye”, he says, and he’s going to start cry himself if he doesn’t go now.

The space between the fence and the Opposition’s black van is large. Alex and Ruth are almost there, and Chris sets out in their footsteps, running through the snow, avoiding the searchlights that’s moving over the ground, painting big yellow circles on the white surface.

There’s something cold running his neck, and it isn’t ice. It’s instinct, pure, animalistic instinct, of a kind he never had when he worked with the Division.

But he knows that something is wrong. Something has happened that shouldn’t have happened, and it’s too late to go back and to far to get to the other side and…

The shot rings out before he has time to finish the thought.

It doesn’t hurt at first. He keeps running. Two steps. Three. Then, all the strength drains from his legs, and he falls to his knees. The snow is cold and wet, seeping through his jeans in no time, even though that is his least important problem right now.

There’s red in the snow in the light of the searchlights.

And then he notices that a little flower of burning pain has flared up in his stomach. He puts a hand against it, grunts a little, and when he takes the fingers away, they’re red as well.

Red against white always felt like a bad omen, and barbed wire makes a lousy crown of thorns. What am I, your personal saviour?

Somewhere, something went wrong. He raises his head, trying to see if Alex and Ruth have made it safely to the other side yet. He only heard one shot. But his sight is beginning to blur, the red and the white floats together, and he realises that now, for some stupid fucking reason, now he’s crying.

It feels like the whole world is watching as he puts his hands on the ground and pushes himself up, almost screaming as the pain in his gut turns to red-hot burning iron, threatening to tear him into pieces.

This time, he makes it four steps before he falls, hits the snow, and his last strength he has is only enough to roll over on his back. The sky is dark grey, and he wishes that there were stars. Dying would be easier with stars.

&&&

Blood on snow, under pale lamplight, is black.

I hear the shot echo out. Then I see Chris fall to his knees, and I think I’m screaming something, but I don’t know what.

And something tells me that this is where it ends.

I can’t see if MacKenzie and ‘Leesh, who wasn’t ‘Leesh, but some stranger named Ruth that I never heard of before, has reached safety on the other side. All I care about is Chris, and when I see how he gets to his feet again, I scream even louder, I shout for him to go on, to Not. Give. Up, damnit, because you never ever give up. The moment you give up, you’re dead.

Then he falls again, rolls over, and this time he’s still, unmoving.

That’s when I stop thinking. I slide through the hole, knowing in my brain, that there’s no way I will be able to haul him back here. He’s twice my height, and even though he doesn’t weigh that much, I know that I won’t be fast enough, won’t be strong enough, won’t be fucking good enough to save him.

But I have to try. Because not trying would mean giving up. And I don’t give up.

I’m almost with him when the second shot rings out, and I feel it rip through my upper thigh, making me stumble. I ignore the pain, pain is irrelevant, it’s something that can be pushed aside for later.

Then the bastards shoot me again, this time in the shoulder, and that makes me keel over, and I lie panting for breath for a moment, feeling the warmth pour out of my body together with the blood.

Blood on snow is black. Black like the jagged little thing in my chest that keeps turning, keeps egging me on, keeps telling me not to give up.

And I don’t give up. You fight, or you crawl. This time, fighting and crawling is the same thing, and I make it over to where Chris lies on my hands and knees, feels bones grating together in my shoulder where the bullet ripped through it, and I feel how something important in my leg must have been torn, because I am So. Fucking. Cold, have never been so cold in my entire life.

Chris’ eyes are closed when I reach him, and I can’t do anything else than fall on top of him, a bleeding, broken heap, and he is so pale, the palest I’ve ever seen him. His skin has that waxy quality, the one I’ve learned to recognize and fear, and for a moment I believe he’s already dead.

Then his eyelids creak open and there’s grey peering up on me where I’m lying, my chest against his, our still-beating hearts pressed together, my face hovering only an inch over his. There’s blood on his lips and his teeth as he smiles and whispers: “My personal saviour.”

And I smile back, and say: “It’s not over yet.”

And he says: “Not yet, but soon.”

Then he closes his eyes again, and I’m to tired to keep my head up any longer, so I let it sink down against his neck. My breath against his ear, and the kiss I place on his cheek is not really a kiss, just the ghost of my lips against his skin.

There are dark blue trouser legs moving towards us.

Blood on snow is black. It spreads out, makes beautiful patterns, makes me wish I was more of an artist so I would be able to capture it on a painting.

I let my eyelids slide shut. Hear the sound of cocking guns.

And this is where it ends…

The End

&&&&&&

A/N - Well, this is where it ends, and I don't think this story will continue (unless I run out of ideas for next NaNo). Greyzone was never about the big picture. It's a story about the people the picture is made up by. Most ofall, it is about Chris and K.C. and when the story ends for them, it ends for me as well.I leave forthe reader to make up the rest. Not even I know what happened to the ahappy ending if you like.

Anyway. This was a first draft, and it will be edited, but I need help to do that. So, what did you think? What was good? What was bad? What should be different? Feedback is appreciated, and also the only thing i getin return for writing all this.