I've been having some really strange dreams lately, so I decided to share them with the world. Well, I'm not quite sure if my dreams have been getting weirder, or if I'm just remembering more of them. Oh well.

I'm also not quite sure if this is fiction... well, I guess I did make it up, or rather, my subconscious made it up. Oh, just forget it.

Since this was a dream, there area lot of things in here that I don't own the rights to. If you have at least ten brain cells, you'll be able to weed them out.

Dream 1: Nameless

This dream is too weird to have a name, so I have just called it nameless. So, let the dreamage begin.

The first thing I remember is that I was somehow a member of the band “Queen”, and that we were in concert. It was no ordinary concert, though, it was a concert on SIX STAGES! However, the coolness of that was detracted from by the fact that all six stages were Disney-themed. As I stood upon Aladdin's flying carpet and looked at the staged shaped like a hairy monkey's chest (which I guess was supposed to be from Tarzan or Mighty Joe Young), I realized something drastic. I had forgotten my tap-dancing shoes! THE HORROR! Of course, this, like everything else, made perfect sense during the dream.

So, I embarked on a journey to retrieve my shoes from the band's trailer, an adventure that somehow took me through India. As I walked through the streets of what seemed to be Mumbai, I noticed that many of my friends and acquaintances were holding some kind of competition in which they got under a giant Chinese dragon costume and walked around. I stayed to watch, because, with dream-logic, that kind of competition was in fact my favorite sport. They easily defeated their opponents, a large group of British guys, who whined and complained for a split second before disappearing completely. The winning team disappeared as well, but by then I had forgotten about them, so I continued on my journey.

The next thing I remember is that I had already retrieved my shoes and was returning to the concert through the streets of Bombay when all of the sudden, some random guy appeared next to me, and I immediately knew that he was to be my companion for the rest of the journey. It was then when I came to another realization- I did not have a plate in my possession! This would make sense to you, too, if you had happened to be in that situation. Always thinking on my feet, I quickly found a street vendor who sold plates. Unfortunately, I realized too late that in her eyes, my companion and I were n00bs, and she was very, very prejudiced against n00bs.

This being the case, she began to make fun of us in L33T-speak. It was so scary that I will not repeat what she said here (and besides, that's not the kind of thing that one would remember from a dream, anyway). After taking a profound verbal beating, we managed to escape into an alley (we meaning my companion and I).

To our surprise, there was a kinder plate saleswoman in the alley who gave us paper plates for free when she found that we had no rupees. We quickly thanked her and returned to the previous vendor to rub our victory in her face. This made her very angry, yet she sneered at us, warning of the approach of the man they called Fodor.

She and my companion suddenly disappeared, as did pretty much everyone who had happened to be on the street at the time. The empty streets seemed somewhat foreboding, so I decided to climb a staircase that appeared next to me and ascend into a tower to find out what the heck was going on.

When I reached the top, I found, to my dismay, a black limo with a large rocket launcher attached to the top of it driving down the street. It stopped as it approached the tower that I was watching from, and a man wearing a tuxedo stepped out of it.

He proclaimed himself as Fodor, and declared that he was about to go on an angry rampage and that he was not liable for any property damage or death that he would cause. He also said that it was nothing personal, he just got really mad sometimes. He then stepped into his limo and proceeded to launch rockets at everything, but mainly at the tower in which I was residing. One would think that would be where I woke up, but for some reason I did not.

Fodor disappeared, as did the city that I had been in. I was in a parking garage, and I found myself very tired. Forgetting about returning to the concert, I found a large piece of modern art and fell asleep on it.

THE END