You throw a float to a drowning man

You’ll hold him up for a span

Still I’m drowning, drowning

Intoxicated

You’d take sweeteners instead of sugar

Supposedly to protect your figure

Still I’m falling, falling

Intoxicated

I couldn’t love you

I shouldn’t like you

I wouldn’t hate you

Would you?

I couldn’t love you

I shouldn’t like you

I wouldn’t hate you

Not you!

I’d take Pepsi for your Coke

But not the other bloke

Still I’m floating, floating

Intoxicated

I’m living Substitution Lane

I’m living Felo-de-se Way

And I’m wishing that I’d never met you