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Chapter Four“The Fake Sound of Progress”
Lazily I bob my head to “Sugar You’re Going Down” by Fall Out Boy and pound the buttons on my Super Nintendo controller. Mario elaborately jumps up in the air, spins, and plummets to the ground annihilating a koopa. The round clears and I move on to the next challenging level. The song blaring from my computer speakers hits the chorus as I belt out the lyrics passionately. Fall Out Boy is my guilty pleasure of music and the number one band played in my car this past summer. I’m a fan and not embarrassed to show my loyalty.
“Oh my God! I love Fall Out Boy,” an excited scream startles me and I peer cautiously at my open doorway.
A tall redheaded girl with a head full of wavy hair bounces in my doorway. A distant memory of a quick introduction in the hallway last week brings up the memory that she’s my neighbor two doors down. I think her name’s Krista.
Smiling I reply to her enthusiasm, “They were the number one cd played in my car this summer.”
Her eyes widen, “You have their cd? Their newest one?”
“Yep.”
Another girl, shorter and with long brown hair appears at Krista’s side.
“Hey, what’s going on?”
“Hi,” I reply straining my memory for her name, “What’s your name again?”
“Cora. I’m this one’s roommate,” she nods her head in Krista’s direction.
Nodding I smile.
“Oh! Can I borrow your cd?” Krista bounds around my room.
Hesitantly I allow her. I’m rather possessive and protective of my music collection. I’m an addict. Krista and Cora return to their room and I close my door wanting a little privacy and alone time. Soon enough, Super Mario World begins to bore me and I shut it off and flip through television stations looking for something that is worthy of entertainment. I settle on VH1.
Sunne: G’morning
LilL123: Hi
Sunne: How are you?
LilL123: Good, you?
Sunne: Very good. You still wanna go to Old Navy?
LilL123: Yep, I was just about to get in the shower.
Sunne: Ah, alrighty. IM me when your finished?
LilL123: Ok
Following suit, I too make my way to the girl’s bathroom for a quick shower. Absolutely bursting with energy and happiness I begin singing. “Shout 2000” by Disturbed is my song of choice and I have no inhibitions about my singing ability, or lack thereof. With a quick turn of the shower knob, I step out from behind the curtain, dry off, and head back to my room to put some clothing on.
Donned in a pair of dark blue flare jeans and my trusty Fall Out Boy t-shirt, I peek at my buddylist and see that Liza is still in the shower. My body grooves to the song currently playing and I dig my hand into the box of stale store-brand rice squares as a quick and impromptu breakfast.
LilL123: I’m back.
Mouth still occupied with munching on old cereal, I divert my attention to my computer.
Sunne: Super! I showered too.
LilL123: I see. When do you want to go?
Sunne: I’m ready now. We could go now if you want to? I’ll drive.
LilL123: Ok.
Sunne: I’ll meet you outside of the UP in about 10 minutes.
The UP is the University Plaza where Liza lives.
LilL123: All right. See you soon.
Sunne: You too, bye.
One last handful of cereal makes its way into my mouth before I grab my car keys, lock my room, and step into the elevator. A grin mischievously makes its way onto my face for absolutely no reason. Cackling slightly I step out of the elevator and quickly greet one of the building custodians before joyfully walking through the building and stepping out into the warm morning air.
Vaguely remembering parking my car in the last row of the parking lot, I maneuver my way between cars and over the occasional broken beer bottle. My car returns to life with a turn of the key and I smoothly steer myself out of the lot and over to the UP.
As planned Liza meets me outside her building. Slight shock runs through my mind as I notice she’s lost some weight.
“You look good,” I smile at her.
Sheepishly she thanks me as I slip a CD into my sound system. The unique sound of Tsunami Bomb streams from my speakers and I sing along to my favorite song, Dawn on a Funeral Day.
“Hehe,” Liza giggles slightly, “This is the CD I bought you for your birthday.”
“Indeed, I adore it very much,” I reach to turn up the volume as we smoothly swerve through the winding streets.
Old Navy is relatively busy when we arrive. The bright lights and bouncy music within liven me and I breeze past racks of clothing in search of the plus-size department. Liza peruses a section away as I sort through stretchy black pants looking for my size. Once located, I straighten up from my previously hunched position and scan the store for Liza. Instead of seeing Liza, I spot a familiar tall figure over in the guy’s section. It’s Joe. Quickly, I duck behind a bright display of shirts hoping he hasn’t seen me.
“What are you doing?” Liza appears at my side and I hurriedly yank her down beside me.
“Shh, I’m hiding.”
“I can see that Jen Pen. Why are you hiding?” Is she mocking me?
“No reason,” I covertly inform her.
“No lying,” a finger wags itself in front of my face.
I point to the guy’s section, “It’s Joe.”
“Oh!” Liza exclaims and pops up from behind the shirt display that doubles as my Joe-Shield.
“Dude! Stay down,” once again I pull her to the floor.
“Why are we hiding from him,” a sale’s person passes by and raises an eyebrow at us before turning into the dressing rooms.
“I don’t want him to see me.”
“Why?”
“’Cause we’re ignoring each other.”
Cautiously I peer around the display and curse quietly; he’s gotten closer.
“I thought you were friends. Didn’t you hang out that one day?”
“Yeah, but now we’re ignoring each other.”
“When did this happen?”
“Um, about five minutes ago,” I glance at my watch nodding, “yep, five minutes ago.”
“Jen Pen, why are you ignoring him?”
“He started it,” damn! He’s still there.
Liza glares.
“He did. He doesn’t talk to me online anymore.”
“Maybe he’s busy.”
“He has all these excuses to go away when I IM him. Too many to keep my suspicion in check.”
“I see.”
I risk another stealthy look over the display.
“Oh, he’s gone,” I spring up and continue shopping.
Ten minutes later, bags in hand, we leave and step out into the breezy afternoon.
“What are you doing the rest of today?” Liza questions while I start up my car.
“I dunno,” a strange feeling overcomes me, “I have homework that I need to get finished. Probably clean.”
Why do I feel like this? One moment I’m having a great time with Liza and the next moment all I want is to be alone. Where did this dark cloud come from?
“What are you doing this afternoon?” I return the question and attempt to quell the threatening darkness.
“Probably the same, I have a child development paper due on Monday,” she watches the houses pass by and I drive on.
The UP eventually appears and we bid our farewells and as I drive away I try to push down the ache brewing in my stomach. The rest of my Saturday is spent brooding in my room alone.
“Hey Jenna,” a familiar voice from behind me calls.
Turning around I see Melissa, her friend Cam, her boyfriend Andy, and another guy I’ve never before seen sitting at a table enjoying some lunch.
“Hey, what’s up?” I nod my greetings to the other people sitting at the table.
“Not much, just eating. We’re on our way to Anderson pool. You want to go?” She asks with a mouthful of sandwich.
A strong feeling to decline wells up and I almost give in to it and retreat to my dorm room to pig out on my sandwich, chips, and cookies while watching Myth Busters. Yet another part of me wants to go swimming. Figuring that I can always give in to my hermit tendencies when I get back I agree to go once I run back to my room to grab my swimsuit, towel, and goggles.
Voicing that I’ll call her once I make it back from my dorm room, I practically make a run for my building. Halfway there I curse the abysmal shape that I am in and slow to a walk. I reach my building, enter, walk through the lobby, and make a run for the elevator as it closes. I narrowly slip in and take a brief breather as my floor approaches.
Five minutes later I’m back on the elevator and another five minutes I’m calling Melissa letting her know I’m ready.
“That was quick.” We walk lazily down Lucinda as cars drive past blaring a variety of music in to the afternoon heat.
“I did run halfway there,” residual pains in my shins are a constant reminder that I should have walked the whole way.
“Did you meet Andy’s friend?” She gestures to the unfamiliar guy currently in a riveting conversation a few strides ahead of us with Cam.
“No.”
“Oh, that’s Bob.” The Bob in question turns at his name and nods a greeting.
“Ah, nice to meet you.”
Bob quickly returns the pleasantry and returns to his conversation with Cam.
Melissa hooks her arm with her boyfriend’s as the chaos and noise from Lincoln Hall pass us. I’m glad I never had to live there as a freshman. It’s usually teeming with crime. However, nothing is worse than Grant. I’m sure if you look up ghetto in a dictionary you’ll see a picture of Grant Hall.
“Does Wal-Mart sell pools?” Bob and Cam slow down and rejoin us who are lagging behind.
“What kind?” Andy asks.
“Like those little pools.”
“Kiddie pools?” I offer wondering why he wants to know.
“Yeah, those kind.”
“I dunno,” Melissa speaks up watching Bob suspiciously, “What are you concocting?”
“I think it’d be fun to have a pool in one of our dorm rooms.”
“Hah, our CAs would love that,” laughs Andy, “We could do it in Melissa’s room. She has more space than our rooms.”
“Um, I don’t think so,” she shakes her head.
“Oh come on, we could put down a tarp and everything. Plus your CA would never know,” Bob tries to convince Melissa.
Personally, it’s not a half bad idea. There’s the obvious potential for fines and getting kicked out of the dorms, but the idea is still appealing.
“I like that idea.”
“See,” Bob points at me, “she thinks it’s a good idea.”
“We could crank up the head, laze around in our bathing suits, drink, and have a pool party.”
The idea loosely holds our attention before being forgotten as we arrive at Anderson Hall.
“Has anyone ever swum at this pool?” Andy asks.
“I have,” I answer.
“Is it a nice pool?”
“Its alright. Keep in mind that it is still NIU. They wouldn’t spend money on a really nice pool.”
The hallways are empty as we make our way to the pool. Odd, considering that there are usually one or two people milling about when the pool’s open. We split up according to gender when we arrive at the locker rooms. Shit, the door wouldn’t budge.
“Are your door’s locked?” We call to the boys.
“Yeah, yours?” They call back.
“Yeah.”
Disappointed, we leave.
“Are there any other pools on campus?” Bob asks.
“Isn’t there one in Gable?” Cam wonders.
“Yeah,” I answer.
Cutting across Lucinda we slowly make our way over to Gable Hall where we hope that their pool is open. Unfortunately, the God of pools is not on our side today. With no other ideas for things to do, we head back to our dorms.
Music blares through my door as I unlock the door and enter my room. I have a habit of leaving my music on constantly, even when I’m sleeping. Dropping my bag on the floor I check my away message for any messages. Low and behold, my friend Raelyn left me a message. Excitement bubbles within me at the idea of someone leaving me a message. It’s a similar feeling I get when I have an email or snail mail in my mailbox.
QueenofHearts: Hey Jennangelo, guess what? Shoeboots is in my clinical seminar.
Like with my friend Liza, my friend Raelyn has a nickname for me. The name stems from this tie-dyed shirt I used to wear constantly and the fact that we used to call it my turtle shell and that line of thought trailed into Michelangelo somehow. Confused? I know, but what else are we supposed to do to entertain ourselves at nine in the morning during our ‘Learning to Teach PE’ class.
That class also caused the existence of Shoeboots. To cut a long story short, we had the giggles one early morning while we were supposed to be working on a stupid dance with a name similar to tinkling. One thing led to another, our giggles turned into hyperness and a horrific, yet splendid, pair of shoes were sighted across the room being worn by a random classmate of ours. Imagine the offspring of a pair of ordinary sneakers and a pair of boots and you will get the monstrosity that was Shoeboots.
What can I say? We were inspired. To this day we can’t see or talk to each other without uttering Shoeboots throughout our conversations.
Sunne: No way! I’m so jealous. I want Shoeboots in my seminar.
QueenofHearts: Too bad.
Sunne: Haha, how are you?
QueenofHearts: Can’t complain, how about you?
Sunne: I’m all right; classes are an absolute bore.
QueenofHearts: Could be worse. You could have Flood.
Flood was our ‘Learning to Teach PE’ professor. She had her definite quirks.
Sunne: Right now I would give anything for the simplicity of her class. Anything would be better than the wack job I’ve got for a math teacher, the ass of a reading teacher, and the two-faced heartless woman who calls herself our social studies teacher.
QueenofHearts: Aww, classes getting you down?
Sunne: Possibly, how are your classes? Who’s your Children’s Literature teacher?
QueenofHearts: Castella, she’s nice.
Sunne: Are you insane?
I had Professor Castella last semester for Children’s Literature. Worst Teacher Ever!
Sunne: I had her last semester and she tried to screw our whole class over with our grades. She was rude and insolent and claimed that we weren’t acting professional when we would just go to her for help.
QueenofHearts: Really? She seems very nice to me, a very chipper woman.
Sunne: Watch out, she bites. She’s also two-faced. I hate two-faced people.
QueenofHearts: Me too. Listen I have to run, but I will talk to you later.
Sunne: Ok, laters.
QueenofHearts: TTYL!
After putting an away message up, I retrieve my sandwich and other previously purchased food and hunker down on my beanbag chair for an evening of Myth Busters.
Before I want to accept it, five thirty rolls around and I find myself waiting for the elevator backpack in hand. The elevator arrives with a groaning screech and the doors clank open. Stepping in, I hit the button marked with the number one and wait for the doors to close. Halfway to the ground floor, the elevator pauses on floor nine. The doors open and to my surprise the last person imagined steps in.
Who knew that the guy with the gray hoodie who was playing guitar on the front stoop of Stevenson the other day lives in my tower? Flutters of nervousness grip my stomach and I immediately curse myself for being shy and attempt to muster the courage to greet him. Come on! It’s not that hard. Just a simple, “Hi.” I am such a wuss. However, he beats me to it.
“Hey,” a deep male voice startles me from my self-cursing.
Smiling I return the greeting, “Hi.”
I adore guys who make the first move.
“Heading to class?” he nods questioningly towards my backpack.
Wryly I grin, “Unfortunately.”
His smile puts me at ease and allows me the small amount of courage to ask my next question.
“I’ve seen you around, what’s your name?” Hotness rises in my cheeks and I pray that it doesn’t show on the outside.
“Nick, how about you?” Curiosity radiates from his ocean blue eyes and something in me becomes hooked upon them.
“Jenny,” now I’m sure I’m blushing.
With a slight bump, the elevator opens and I’m temporarily relieved from my growing blush. Melissa, awaiting my arrival, grins at my obvious blush as Nick and I step out of the elevator.
“Try not to die of boredom,” Nick playfully grins before walking off.
“I’ll try.”
A smile has permanently glued itself to my face.
“Who was that?” Melissa suggestively wonders.
“He lives in my tower,” outside a cool breeze helps to quell the residual blush still inhabiting my face.
“You’re blushing.”
“He’s just a guy.”
I don’t know why, but I just want to keep my encounter with Nick to myself. Melissa senses this and the rest of our walk to class is spent in comfortable silence while I ponder the short thirty second elevator ride that may have just changed my life.
“Hey ladies, what’s going on?” a slight Asian guy takes the seat on the other side of Melissa.
“Hey Kyle.”
I’ve known Kyle since my freshman year when we lived in the same building. He’s a cool guy and fun to hang out with.
“When do you want to work on the social studies unit?” Kyle pulls a baggie of gummy bears out of his backpack and offers them to us.
I grab a handful and inform him that since Georgia isn’t in this class we’ll have to decide tomorrow. Our social studies methods class is a pain in the ass. One of our assignments is this huge unit plan on some random concept; we picked government. This thing will take the entire semester to complete and our teacher is incredibly picky about how it is to be done. We’ve already had to do two rewrites on the first part we turned in.
At this moment, our professor enters the room and class begins.
“Is another one of our text sets for reading due tomorrow?” Melissa asks hugging her body in an effort to keep warm.
Shit! I hadn’t done my assignment yet and it’s due tomorrow morning. Oh well, I’ll quickly crank it out when I get back to Stevenson.
“I think so. Have you done yours yet?”
“No, have you?”
“Nope,” a small stone goes flying down the street as I kick it, “I hate that class.”
“Me too, we should have lunch and play Mario together tomorrow.”
“We shall,” smiling I continue home while idly talking with Melissa.
Before we know it we reach our building and climb up the front steps. My heart begins to race as I see Nick sitting with his friends. Should I say hi to him? Is one meeting in the elevator enough to qualify for a casual hello? What should I do? Why can’t they make instruction manuals for situations like this? Overcome with unsure feelings of what to do, I keep my head bowed and follow Melissa into the building.
“Wasn’t that that guy?” she motions to Nick sitting outside.
I shrug, “I don’t know.”
“Jenna! Yes it was. Why are you hiding?”
“I’m not, I just wasn’t paying attention.”
“Right,” she slyly responds making it obvious that she doesn’t believe me.
Why am I such a fool at these things? Sometimes I think I’m destined to be alone for the rest of my life. Almost as if there is something wrong with me that keeps me from finding that certain someone. I don’t want to accept it, but I know that a part of me has already accepted that that is my fate. Giving up is not what I want to do, but sometimes I feel there is nothing else to do.
Departing for my own tower I ponder my relationship history, or lack thereof, before condemning myself to a night of homework.
Lya-S – I’d like to thank you for the in-depth review. It’s not very often that you get a review like that. Anyways, you are right in that I didn’t describe Joe (shame on me!), that my conversations with Melissa are not so in-depth (my weak point is dialogue…but practice makes perfect), and that I go from scene to scene rather quickly. Part of that has to do with that this is indeed autobiographical and that’s just how my life was and part of it is that I’m writing this more for fun than writing it seriously, I’m not exactly paying attention to all the small stuff. The serious writing is saved for my novel I’m working on. But thanks for your review I hope you liked this chapter.
Trill Beck – Haha…Trill Beck…sorry I still can’t get over your name. Anyways, yes the character of Benny is indeed charming, charismatic, and intelligent (but you already know that). However, I’m sure if I’ve told you once I’ve told you a million times that this will not have any sex in it. Plus we’ve talked about this. Oh, and I don’t think Joe swings that way.
Faded Soulfire – Yes, Jenna is bored a lot. Perhaps too bored to be normal but that’s just how she is. I’m ecstatic that you like this. I find it encouraging knowing that people like my writing. Yes, my titles are all titles of songs that I particularly like. I choose them based upon the total tone of the chapter. Music is a huge part of my life (in both listening to it and playing it) and I think for a story like this (that is autobiographical in a way) to have my love for music sprinkled within. Oh, and I’m sad too that Wallflower is discontinued but I like to think of that story as a piece of writing that helped me become the writer that I am today. For it did help me become the writer I am today. Thank’s for your review. I appreciate it.
Thanks,
Sunne
