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Author: Dying In Black
Title: Sing the Sorrow
Rating: Rated R for adult situations, Homosexuality and Language
Summary: Thomas is brief stricken when he learns that the one he loves only has a few months to live due to a rare blood disease. Chalice is his lover; dying slowly he battles a sickness that threatens his mind, body and heart…
Chapter One: Miseria Cantare
The little girl ran into the house as the first drops of rain began to fall from the clouded black sky. Her hair spiraled with red streaks her green set eyes large in comparison to her small pixie face. Her face was covered in light brown specks, making her seem so much younger than she really was. She was petite, so much smaller than all her classmates, yet her mind progressed as any other third graders would.
Her tennis shoes squeaked in the kitchen as she ran to the table grabbing a box of Wheaties and opening the lid. Her hand reached into the box and grabbed a handful of the crackers as she stuffed them in her mouth. She chewed loudly grinning triumphal as her small grubby hand reached for another handful, when the kitchen door swung open and a tall imposing figure entered the room.
The man was very tall with a heedful of black hair that fell on his face obscuring his deep set of blue eyes. He smirked at the girl before laughing at the specks of crumbs on her mouth and cheeks. He grabbed a towel and wiped her face making sure to be gentle before he took the box and placed it upon the shelf.
“Where’s Chalice?” he questioned the little girl as she shrugged and wandered into the leaving room, leaving the man as he sighed to follow.
Sitting on the couch he watched Samantha watch television silently, her wide eyes set on the television never once moving or turning her attention from the cartoons that began to bonk heads with one another or the mouse that ran from the big gray cat, only to have the cat fall into his neighbors yard where a rather big dog would punch.
The cartoon seemed very sinister, yet Samantha watched never once smiling and never once frowning. She wasn’t an open book and it scared Thomas. When he had applied for guardian for the child, he had not known that child would have been cold and distant.
She was a cute little thing, yet adding another person to take care of scared Thomas. He had Chalice to take care of and he was so much important than any other in the household. Chalice was his lover, the quiet boy suffering from an unknown blood disease that seemed to be killing him everyday.
Thomas loved the boy, but he had to work in order to provide for Chalice. Chalice never enjoyed loneliness and when the aspect of having a child, Thomas was the first to volunteer. He would take care of his sister’s daughter until she would come out of rehab for the third time. While Thomas went to work, Chalice would stay with Samantha and both would keep each other company.
The plan soon backfired; Chalice was sickly and unable to cope with a child. Thomas had almost died at hearing that Chalice hated the concept of children because he was afraid of them. His father and mother had always neglected him and his sister, and one day when he had taken care of his little sister while their parents went to a party, she was gone. Days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months until finally, Chalice’s sister was forgotten of and never to be heard of again.
And so now Thomas took to caring of a third grader and his twenty year old Chalice. He liked Samantha, and although Samantha liked him back, she seemed more interested in spending time with Chalice. And Thomas knew why, Chalice was a spitting image of the angel Samantha always spoke of, her guardian angel that had saved her mommy and herself from driving off the road. Thomas had been shocked at Samantha’s story yet thought this would be the reason of broken boundary, yet he was wrong.
Chalice wanted nothing with children and he would stay holed up in his room until Thomas would say it was all right and leave him be. Chalice was strong, yet his body was weak. It always had been, and Thomas cursed because of it. Chalice was beautiful and kind and he deserved so much more than a weak mind and body that would render him helpless at the hands of so many people.
Thomas didn’t want that to ever happen again.
The door swung open and Thomas could hear the soft steps of Chalice as he walked barefooted into the kitchen. Thomas rose from his seat, leaving Samantha to her commercials as he opened the kitchen door and watched as Chalice sat on the stool, his back facing Thomas.
Thomas watched the long tendrils of white blond hair that fell to Chalice’s lower back, his simple bathrobe a ratty old thing that was of a washed pink. His pale skin visible from the thin clothing he wore under.
Thomas wrapped his arms over Chalice’s thin waist and knelt his face at the crook of Chalice’s neck inhaling the simple scent of old furniture and windy air. He kissed the soft white skin and nuzzled it with the tip of his nose. Chalice did not move, his large soft tan eyes dazed as they watched the rain pounding outside the window, large droplets falling over one another.
A long fingered hand touched Thomas cheek and he could feel the cool touch of it as he kissed the white hand and took it in his own.
“You should be in bed,” he commented and kissed Chalice’s neck.
“I want to see the rain,” a soft quiet whisper embedded out of pink lips before shutting tightly uttering no other explanation.
“You’ll get sick again, the doctor will get mad.”
“He told me that he wanted me to die.”
“No he didn’t, he said he didn’t want you to get anymore sick than you already are.”
“He said to die he did, tear my limbs from limb by limb, eat my heart and swallow my eyes as I wander blind and cold through the streets…”
Thomas sighed, Chalice his little delusional love. Chalice had made it clear that the doctor had wanted to eat his heart and eyes during his first visit, taking the alternative of wearing as much possible of sweaters to cover his upper body and Thomas’s large sunglasses obscuring his eyes from the doctor who had laughed at Chalice before proceeding with his work.
“You have to go to bed Chalice, how could you get up from bed? You were sleeping a few minutes ago,” began Thomas before he stopped noticing a tear fall on Chalice’s cheek “What’s wrong love?”
“Do you love me Thomas?”
“You know I do Chalice.”
“Why don’t you say it anymore?”
“I do, everyday every night, I love you Chalice I love you so much it hurts.”
“Where does it hurt Thomas, why do I cause you so much pain?”
“My heart, you hurt my heart, but I love this hurt.”
“Why Thomas?”
“Because I know I love, and its good when someone hurts for the one they love…”
“I hate you Thomas…”
“…I know you do…”
