It’s Woden’s Day, aka the 25th

Dearest Diary of Mine,

It is, alas, perhaps the most terrible of all the days of the week.

Why, you ask? WHY O WHY?

I shall tell you, little me.

I have no friends.

My parents just died in a car crash.

My older sister has turned to drugs in order to forget her pain, and my boyfriend broke up with me.

I’m serious.

No, seriously.

…serious…

Heh heh, I LOVE that word. Serious, serious, serious. I said it twenty times today before Euro Lit to Jake, and he told me to shut up, which was a nice improvement to the AWESOME job of ignoring me that he’s been doing since Monday.

And I mean it. That boy is avoiding me the way snakes avoid pine sap. It is SICK.

And let me tell you, snakes REALLY REALLY REALLY hate pine sap. I learned it last year in Biology, on one of the rare days when I was actually paying attention, because someone had mentioned something about sex and I was shifted unhappily out of my lovely day dreaming state. Actually, I’d been dreaming about the day when Chewbacca will tell me (in Wookie) about his undying love for me.

So that’s how I know about snakes and conifers.

Anyway. Back to Mr. Wildern.

After the heart shattering “Shut up, Cat,” that he gave me, I turned back to Jen, who decided that I have a creepy obsession with cream pitchers.

Really, I have no idea where she got that idea.

…serious….HA!

Enough of this mindless babble! School actually wasn’t all that bad! It turned out that Madame Banks felt sorry for the terrible grade that I got on my speech last week, and she let me try it again.

After I cleverly stated: Je voudrais manger touts les personnes, she informed me that I should NEVER talk to a French person- they’d probably shoot me. Now, that’s mighty suspicious as it is, so I wondered where they’d get the gun. She told me to go away- my grade wasn’t going to change any time soon.

I skipped to Euro, said serious a bajillon times to Fey Boy, grinned rather cheekily at Mrs. Clemmings when she asked me why I’d drawn a cream pitcher that was shaped like a cow on my desk, and I learned about some weird German philosopher.

Anywhos.

Chior… eh… I was paying attention for once, but that’s only because we started watching a movie about opera, and I’ve always wondered where they find all those fat people who sing so well.

HEH! LUUUUUUNCH TIME! LUNCH TIME! I’m doing my LUNCH TIME dance RIGHT now! Luuuunch tiiiime!

“HEEELLLO, FELLOW MORTALS!” I boomed, hugging Ein and ruffling his ridiculous red hair. “WHAT’S COOKING?”

“Nothing,” Jon was in a bad mood, which made me all the more pleased to see me. I take no greater joy than laughing at people in bad moods. Taareth is a good example of that! Speaking of Taareth- eh- I’ll get to that.

“You got sum pesto for me?” I wondered, eying Jon as I poked industrially at my slice of pizza.

“Be quiet, Cat,” Jon growled, glowering at me and Ein.

I chuckled behind my hand. “Too hoo!”

“Cat…” Jon sighed, and leaned back in his chair. “Can you PLEASE be quiet?”

“Only if you hug me,” I said pathetically, picking off a sausage. It didn’t LOOK much like a sausage, sadly enough. It more closely resembled one of Ein’s freckles. I held it up to his face for comparison.

“Eew, Cat, what is that?” Ein wondered, backing away.

“Sausage,” I said, flicking it at his face.

Now THAT was a funny look! Future me, you MUST throw fakish grossish sausage at Veg’s faces. They TOTALLY freak out.

“Ein… why are you trying to kill Cat?” Jen had wondered, sitting down next to Jon.

Ein glared at me. I smiled sweetly back.

Yes, it was a good lunch.

Ooooh! Math!

In Calc, I grabbed Jake’s arm, and asked him if he’d marry me.

He eyed me. “Somebody dumb is in a good mood,” he said, trying to detach himself.

“Dumb? Does that mean yes?” I wondered, simpering up at him. “Because I LURVE you, Jake!”

The geeky seniors were all giving us suspicious looks.

I cared not.

Jake looked down at me, sighed, and rolled his eyes. “Fine,” he said.

“YES?!” I screeched, pretending to be delighted. Oh- wait- I WAS delighted! “You’ve gotten over your fear of sap!” I yelled, letting go of him.

“What?!” Jake stared at me. “WHAT?!”

“Now,” I said, grabbing him again in the GRIP OF DOOM, “Tell me why you’re going to die on Friday.”

Jake looked ill at the mention of it. “Go away, Waddell.”

I suppose that I felt a little bad for bringing up something that he OBVIOUSLY was trying to avoid thinking about, but he honestly shouldn’t have told me in the first place.

I rubbed my hands together. I chuckled. And I schemed.

Properly, the seniors –and Jake- all looked very scared.

Exceeelent.

Um… I don’t remember the rest of school day.

But I do remember this! As I jumped out of the school building, it started POURING. And I mean POURING! The heavens split with a might Caboom and in less than five seconds, I was soaked like an otter.

Well. There went my Physics homework!

Feeling rather pleased that I wouldn’t have to worry about THAT tonight, I skipped through quite a few puddles, got splashed by quite a few cars in a hurry, and stopped pensively near the corner of my street.

Standing like… oh…Ten feet away or something was the most hottest man alive.

“TAARETH!” I shrieked, absolutely delighted to see such a lovely and grumpy fey dude in the middle of a rainstorm.

He, alas, did not seem so pleased with the enthusiastic NINJA HUG OF LOOOOVE that I gave him.

“Who the crap are you?” He demanded, pushing me off of him. His eyes narrowed. “Oh,” he said, noticing my delighted grin, soaking red top and just as wet bright blue skirt. “You.”

“Me!” I swirled around, and stopped, clapping my hands together. “How are you, O Demon Fairy Elf Man?”

“Go away,” he muttered, sounding very much like Mr. Grumpies (Jon and Jake).

I was not to be pushed aside like an old newspaper! “That was some awesome party, huh?” I asked brightly.

Taareth glared at me out of the corners of his eyes. “You got DRUNK, human.”

I pouted very prettily. “I thought I told you to call me Cat,” I said, crossing my arms. Eew. They were wet and clammy.

He ignored me, and I poked his arm. It was wet and clammy too.

He eyed me.

I blinked at him sweetly.

“Fine, CAT. Go away,” Taareth snapped.

No way!

“Why are you standing out here in the rain?” I wondered, noticing something on his back. Yes, I am rather unobservant. “Why the crap is there a guitar case on your back?”

Taareth gave me a sarcastic look. “Obviously, that’s where I put the dead bodies.”

I paused.

…Did he just make a joke?

YES!

Taareth seemed to realize his mistake too late. He almost looked like he was blushing, and he looked away angrily. “No, idiot,” he snapped over my chuckles, “I play it.”

“You in a band or somethin’?” I wondered, shivering. It was pretty cold too… curses to September…

Taareth pretended to ignore me.

“Do you sing?” I wondered, suddenly keen on the idea. Ooh. Hot Taareth singing totally smexy.

He continued to pretend to ignore me.

Well. As EXCITING as this was, I was getting cold, so I shivered, and stepped closer to Taareth, debating between telling him something that I’d usually only say to one of three boys (the J-men and Ein Baby) As is often the case with me, I have to say the most embarrassing thing possible.

I can’t even WRITE it, it was so embarrassing! Oh! How I blush! How my face BURNS!

I’M BUUUUURNNING!

Indeed!

Taareth didn’t say anything for a LONG time, and during that time, I realized that I just said something completely humiliating. Now, usually, I’m un-humiliate-able, but with Taareth, who landed on me under a table, I have SO much shame.

“Oh,” I said. “Uh…forget I said that.”

Taareth inched away from me. “Don’t you have to be somewhere?” he demanded, perhaps deciding to forget my embarrassing comment.

Whew.

“Umm….” I thought about that one. “Other than the Millennium Falcon, I don’t think so.”

He eyed me some more with his lovely light brown eyes. They’re so weird that they’re gorgeous. “Don’t you live somewhere then?”

“Uh…” My teeth chattered. “Eeer… I guess so.”

There was another long pause.

Actually, I’m amazed that I remember all of this! Perhaps fey encounters are unforgettable! Yay! What a silly idea, but how lovely it is!

So, to make a long story short, which is hard with me, because I REALLY like to babble, because with out babbling ALL conversations are completely boring, Taareth and I stood around at the corner of the street until he demanded to know why I didn’t go inside if I was so fucking cold, and I told him that I liked our bonding time.

Five minutes after THAT, Taareth managed to force my address out of me, and he dragged me down the street to my house, while I shivered and sneezed, and felt properly wet all over.

Taareth was glaring DEATH at me the whole while, which amused me to no ends, and he finally rang my doorbell –grin- and continued to glare at me.

“Have you ever killed anyone by looking at them?” I wondered pleasantly.

“What the crap?” Taareth stared at me. “What are you talking about?!”

“Well, you know,” I began, but then Mom had to swing the door open, and ruin my very important question.

Anyway, Mom thought that Taareth was my BOYFRIEND, which was totally hilarious, because he denied it, and I shrugged when she asked me, and then she dragged him inside and made him sit down so that Dad and Kris and Emma and Erin and Lillian could all interrogate him.

It was really, really fun, especially the part when Dad asked why someone as old as he was was associating with a sixteen year old girl.

“I’m only twenty,” Taareth muttered. He obviously felt grumpy again.

Mom gasped, and cried into Daddy’s shoulder, and I laughed for a good twenty minutes after Emma pouted about how SHE wanted a boyfriend as hot as Taareth.

Finally, I decided to let Mr. Demon Guitar Playing Scary Elf return to normality.

“He’s not my boyfriend,” I told them.

“OH.” They all said at once, and promptly began to ignore Taareth, and return to their normal lives.

Taareth stood over me at the doorway, obviously wanting to run far, far away. He eyed me. “You are a very scary individual, Cat,” He informed me.

I hugged him my most specialist hugs of all, The Pirate Hug of Booty and Good Meat. Oh. That can sound VERY wrong.

…heh.

After Taareth ran away, I realized I was still fricking freezing and dripping water all over the place, so I changed into perhaps the SOFTEST pajamas in the history of FOREVER, snuggled under a blankie, and wrote in this miserable excuse for an outlet.

Speaking out outlets, I once stuck a knife in an outlet after one of my plastic beads got stuck in there. Now THAT was exciting…. Oh yes… goodtimes.

So. I’m cold.

Bye bye!

Love to All,

Catherine Ect. Waddell

oooo

A/N: Catherine Ect. Waddell. Wow. I wish that was my name.

Well, anyway. There it is, another happy chappy. I’m not so sure when the next one will be up, because it’s still in the processes of being written, but I’m hoping that I won’t be killed by finals before I can get it up.

Yes. Well. Yaaay summer! I’ll be gone for a while (four weeks) seeing as how I will be working up at my camp, but I should be back during July. Hopefully. Haha.