Chapter One

People always told me this quote: “First love never dies.”

You’ve got to be joking me.

Okay, so what if your first love was your seatmate in first grade? That so dies. I mean, just because he lent me his pencil and gave me a really cute smile back then doesn’t mean that I’d spend the rest of my life with him. Besides, he moved away to Mississippi after third grade.

I’ve been a love cynic ever since I was thirteen when my best friend had been brokenhearted because of some guy named Mark Howell. I’ve hated him ever since and every boy for that matter. The point of love is just completely for other people to get hurt or to hurt other people.

It’s just plain stupid. Love is an emotion that cannot feel the pain it brings.

By the way, my name’s Marissa Cerina Bilson. I have long dark brown hair that comes down in layers past my shoulder blades—it’s never untied—and plain dark blue eyes. I’m sort of skinny but lean and I sadly have those “curvaceous” schmuck. I’m not a cheerleader, nor a soccer player or whatever sport you guys want. I’m a kickboxing singer. Sadly.

As my best friends Taylor Brooks and Allison Preston told me, love bites. And honestly, I don’t want any paper hearts going after my ass, y’know? That’s just… creepy. On all levels on creepy, that’d be on the highest.

I’m never gonna fall in love.

That’d be a definite fact.

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I hate Mondays. They’re one of the most horrible days of the week. You have to start a new week in a hellhole parents call “school” and of course, the tortures of high school social ladder-climbing for us less fortunate in life.

Can we just say we’re hanging around the middle of the ladder and not going any higher?

Taylor, Allie and I have been best friends since kindergarten when Taylor stole Allie’s crayon and I beat him up for the heck of it. My teacher awarded Taylor and I a time-out while Allie stood there, crying with her now broken pink crayon.

Taylor was scared of me, Allie was scared of Taylor and I was scared of no one. How power ran through my veins, I don’t know. Even right now when I approached Taylor and Allie, she shot me a smile. “Why’d you black-eye old Tay here again?” she questioned.

“It was an innocent game of Tekken 5,” I said with a grin, punching Taylor in the shoulder. Taylor glared at me before clutching his shoulder. Okay, so I was a good kick boxer. I don’t punch THAT hard… Do I?

“You hated the fact that Yoshimitsu lost to Heihachi and you know it.” Taylor rubbed his arm and opened his locker, his long brown bangs falling into his eyes. It actually made me feel sort of queasy in my stomach, but I shrugged it off.

Hey, I didn’t eat breakfast.

“Anyway, you two arguing little whiny kids, let’s get to Geometry before you rip each other’s heads off,” Allie concluded with a roll of her sea green eyes. I grabbed my books from my locker before jogging up with Allie.

“Hey, I’ll catch up with you two later, okay?” Taylor called out. I turned my head around to say an affirmative, but I had already seen him walk off. To see Kimberly Gates, a blonde, suck ass cheerleader with a smile that can melt guys’ insides into mush and girls’ insides back out from where it came from.

I mean, I so wasn’t jealous. After all, he could talk to any girl he wanted.

I don’t keep him away from anything.

Do I?

My head is going in circles. I rolled my eyes and followed Allie into the Geometry classroom. I wasn’t jealous. Maybe just shocked. After all, I grew up with Taylor. He was one of my best friends. Well, if he wanted to date her, let him. It’s no big deal to me. Why I’m babbling on about such a stupid topic, I don’t know. It’s stupid.

Honestly, it is.

So I should stop thinking about it…

…

…

…

Why would he pick her?! Not Allie?! Or even… me?

I’m delusional. I believe I am.

“Hey, can you actually pay attention to what I’m saying?” Allie snapped her slender fingers in front of my face. I blushed and looked at her. “God, what’s up with you today?”

I let go of the elastic that held up my brown hair and looked down at my binder where a picture of Taylor, Allie and I stood during our sophomore night. A soft smile crossed my face. Whoa. Since when’d I get all emotional?

“Since when did you let your hair loose?” a voice questioned, making me whip around and trip over a chair. A pair of strong arms caught me and a smirk met my gaze. I rolled my eyes again at Taylor before releasing myself from his grasp.

“Since now.” I looked back at Allie and for once, she looked at me with a strange glint in her eyes. I flopped down in my seat before staring at the blackboard. Taylor had appeared behind me and he tugged at my hair. “Ow!”

“Your hair’s… longer.”

“No duh, it grows as the year progresses,” I retorted, my voice lined with sarcasm. Taylor tugged at my hair and pulled himself closer. I shrieked and swatted him with my arm. “Taylor! My hair!”

“Since when’d you care?” Allie asked, a grin on her face. I glared at her before staring forward, tying my hair up in a ponytail.

“Since now.”

“My little ‘Rissa is finally turning into a girl,” Taylor squealed, wrapping his arms around me. I felt my cheeks turn red before I shoved his arms away. “Ow! Riss!”

“Shut up before I turn you into cow shit,” I muttered before staring forward. I am a girl, if he hasn’t noticed. Then again… I hadn’t noticed him turn into such a guy as well.

I’d hate to be cliché.

But I’m slowly starting to be. Gulp.