Shadows Cry Silently

By: K.S. Night

Chapter 1- Unfortunate Survivors

Nadia woke up in a strange room. There was a white ceiling above her, and the beeping of a machine to her right. For a moment, Nadia didn’t believe it. She was actually in a hospital. Had her injuries been that serious?

She sat up gingerly, wincing as a sharp pain shot through her shoulders. What had happened? Nadia couldn’t quite remember. There were vague images and memories here and there. Beyond that, there was nothing. She knew that her memories would return eventually.

Another pain pierced through her thoughts. She lay back down carefully. The pain shrunk into a dull ache along her shoulders.

Nadia was trying to remember how she had gotten here. Memories came back to her one at a time; how her brothers had teased her first, and how things had escalated. How her father had…

It all came back to her in a rush. Emotional pain joined physical pain. She put her face in her hands and began to sob quietly. How could he have just stood there, Nadia wondered to herself. He was standing right there, and he didn’t do anything!

“Hey!”

Nadia stopped crying immediately. She looked to her left and saw a boy with very messy rust-colored hair and stunningly green eyes. Those eyes were circled with black rings that may have been from Insomnia. He was giving her a look that said he knew a lot more than he should.

“Quit crying. It can’t hurt that bad, can it?” he asked harshly. Nadia glared at him. He sighed. “Oh, lighten up. It was just a joke.” He flipped a page in the magazine he was reading.

“Not funny,” Nadia muttered, looking away from him. He scratched at the bandage around his head.

“So…what happened to you?” the boy asked casually. Nadia stiffened slightly.

“Nothing happened to me,” she lied. “At least, nothing I can remember.” She knew what would happen to her if she told anybody what was really going on.

“Oh, bullshit!” the boy guffawed. “Please! Methinks I’m in the same situation as you are, so you might as well be honest about it.”

Nadia looked at him suspiciously. Was he like her? If so, why was he being so open about it? Wouldn’t he get in serious trouble for telling somebody?

“So who does you?” he asked, not taking his eyes of his magazine.

“My brothers,” Nadia replied. “They’re all older than me, and bigger than me. There’s four of them.”

“Parents?” the boy pressed.

“Mom lives in some other state,” Nadia answered. “She walked out. She knew what was going on, though. Dad doesn’t care. He watches.”

“Sad,” the boy chuckled. “My dad does me. Usually just a belt or something. When he’s really pissed off, he uses a baseball bat. That’s not for very long. He doesn’t want any serious trouble.” He looked at her. There was a small smile on his mouth. “We are the unfortunate survivors of terrible ‘accidents. What excuse do you give people who ask?”

“I wear long sleeves and pants all the time,” Nadia replied. “Nobody sees them and nobody asks. Those who do ask get an answer like, ‘I accidentally cut myself peeling an apple’ or something lame like that. Nobody really cares, so nobody really questions it.”
“What’d you give the doctors and nurses here,” the boy wondered. “Those were some pretty serious marks on your back. I think the nurse said there was a word carved into your flesh.”
“I told them that I didn’t see their faces and that they didn’t sound familiar,” Nadia sighed. “I was walking home from school when some people grabbed me. I made it home afterwards, but that was as far as I got.” She shrugged, wincing as her shoulder protested. “Like I said, nobody really cares, so nobody’s going to question anything I tell them.”

“Same here,” the boy giggled. “I’m Jared Tyler. I’m almost twelve.”
“I’m Nadia Diamondstein,” Nadia replied. “I’m almost twelve, too. My birthday’s in two months.”

“Mine’s in two weeks,” Jared told her idly. He turned another page in his magazine. “This is such a boring book! There’s nothing interesting about some actress whose boyfriend cheated on her with his secretary and all that crap. It’s just…so pointless.”

“So is most of life,” Nadia pointed out. “Sometimes I just feel like ending it. It would make things easier for everybody…including my so-called family.”

“Don’t say that!” Jared snapped. Nadia looked at him in surprise. His irritated expression had changed to anger. “Don’t ever say that! By killing yourself and ending everything, they’ve won! Don’t you get it? We can’t defy them openly for fear of being mutilated beyond all recognition. But by living, we piss them off. Just the fact that we’re there makes them mad. That’s how we can defy them! That’s the only way we can defy them! By living!”

Jared’s words made Nadia think. He had a very good point. Admiration blossomed inside her and she stared at him. Jared tried to ignore her, but when she kept staring, he looked back at her.

“Quit it,” he ordered. “That’s annoying.” Nadia kept staring at him. Her admiration had all but faded completely. The only reason she still stared at him was because it obviously annoyed him.

After another five minutes, Jared sighed dramatically and tossed his magazine across the room. He flung his legs over the side of his bed and dragged a chair over to Nadia’s. Taking out a deck of cards, he began to shuffle them.

“Ever played poker?” he asked curiously. Nadia shook her head. “Well, get ready to learn. I have a feeling that we’re going to be here for a while, so we might as well keep ourselves occupied.” And thus a friendship was born.

Nadia and Jared found each other after they got out of the hospital. They found out that they attended the same school by some miracle. Both of them wore black and because of that they didn’t have any other friends. The other grade school children were afraid of the scary boy and girl who wore nothing but black, even on extremely hot summer days.

By the time they were fifteen, they knew each other very well. Sometimes, when their eyes met, they knew exactly what the other was thinking. There were no secrets between them. Occasionally there were people who tried to talk to them in school. Most were frightened away by the eerie way Nadia and Jared seemed to think the same things at the same time and then say whatever it was they thought in unison. Most thought they were twins and they had the twin telepathy. Jared and Nadia only laughed at that.

Both Nadia and Jared were in the school’s top band. Nadia played the French horn and Jared played the alto saxophone. They had done lawn-mowing, babysitting, car washing, snow shoveling, and other such jobs to buy their own instruments. After a scare with one of Nadia’s brothers, they kept their instruments at school to avoid ruining them.

The only class they actually liked was band class. They were connected to the group as they had never been in any other place. Nobody cared what they looked like as long as they practiced and sounded good. It was a wonderful change from the usual stares and gawking of the other students.

After they had both turned sixteen, the two of them had a party to celebrate. They exchanged gifts, listened to music, and watched a movie; just the two of them. Jared gave Nadia a sketchbook and a locket that said, “Best Friends Forever” in the game language both had learned to speak to confuse people. On the back was a note that said, “I love you, Sister” in the same language. Inside was a picture of them both, arms around each other. Nadia choked back tears as she hugged Jared tightly.

Nadia had bought Jared a black sock hat that said, “My Brain is Broken” in bright green print. Along with that went a sketchbook with several pencils and other art supplies. She also found some saxophone solo pieces in a music shop. Jared’s normally irritated expression failed him as he stared at his gifts. Nadia thought she saw a tear in his eye.

They separated hours later. Nadia was barely through the door before her brothers were on her, demanding to know where she had been and where she’d gotten the sketchbook. She was grateful they hadn’t noticed the locket. They would surely have broken it just to see her cry. They hated her and she would get no mercy from them.

After an hour of scratching, biting, kicking, and punching, Nadia fled to her room and locked the door. She hugged her sketchbook to her chest. It was still intact. She hadn’t let them take it from her.

Her face hurt. She reached up to touch it and drew it back bloody. There would be a scar there. It didn’t matter. She had more scars than she cared to count. One more wouldn’t make any difference.

Nadia’s brain finally registered something it had neglected for years: she had to get out of there. Her brothers would eventually kill her if she stayed. As long as she stayed in that house, she risked getting beaten to death by her own flesh and blood.

Her mind whirled as she scrambled around, throwing things into her backpack. All her textbooks had disappeared after school ended. That made a considerable amount of room in her bag. She threw in a few articles of clothing and jewelry; her toothbrush and toothpaste; a comb, brush and hair binders; her sketchbook and pencils; her headphones and any CD’s she owned; her wallet; her army of miniature permanent markers; notebooks full of stories she had created. She was certain that was all she possessed that she would need. Her precious French horn was tucked safely in a locker in a storage center. That, at least, would be safe.

She climbed through her window and onto the front lawn. As she headed for the street, one of her brothers saw her leaving and called to the others. Nadia bolted, panic clouding her brain. If they caught her they would kill her. The thought speeded Nadia’s flight. Soon her brothers had lost her.

She waited for what seemed like hours. When she was sure it was totally safe, she began traveling in the direction of Jared’s house. He would want her to say goodbye before she completely vanished. Nadia knew where he lived, and she knew which window was his. She even knew how to get into the house if she needed to. Jared had told her everything. If she ever needed help or he needed help, they could get in and out without any problems.

Unless they were caught, of course.

Nadia made it to Jared’s house just after midnight. The small desk-light in Jared’s room was on. He was sitting in a corner, drawing. There were fresh bruises on his face; evidence of another beating.

Nadia rapped on the window lightly. He looked over and saw her. Quickly and quietly he opened the window and stuck his head out. The window would only open far enough so he could barely squeeze through if he needed to. It usually took him about five minutes to get through with Nadia’s help.

“What’s up?” he wanted to know. “I’d let you come in, but Dad’s getting drunk in the living room. He’ll probably be in here within ten minutes.”

“I came to say goodbye,” Nadia reported. “I can’t take it anymore, Jari. I’ve got to get away. They’ll kill me if I stay…and they’re going to do it soon. I can tell.”

“You’re going alone?” Jared scoffed. “I can’t have that. I’m coming with you. Somebody’s got to keep you out of trouble.”

“Jari, trouble follows you around like a shadow,” Nadia teased. She was glad he had decided to join her. Jared found his own schoolbag and began to pack: clothes, his sketchbook, a comb, toothbrush, his wallet, headphones and CD’s, extra batteries, his favorite movies and video games, the memory cards he and Nadia shared, and for whatever reason, a roll of duct tape.

“One of the three essential things in life in order to be happy,” he whispered to her. “Duct tape, permanent markers, and WD-40.”

“Don’t forget rock music,” Nadia reminded him. He laughed and tossed his bag out the window. At the last minute, he threw his miniature game console to her. She barely managed to stuff it into his bag.

“If you think I’m going to leave that here with him, you’re insanely mistaken,” Jared growled as he tried to squeeze himself through the window.

“Boy!”

Both of them froze. Stomping footsteps could be heard in the hallway. Nadia seized Jared’s arms and hauled on them. Jared frantically wriggled, trying to get through the window. A moment before Jared’s bedroom door opened, he slid through. Both of them tumbled to the ground. They held absolutely still as Jared’s father looked around.

“Boy, where are you?” he bellowed. “You better get your ass out here right now! When I get my hands on you, I’m gonna beat you so hard-“

Neither Jared nor Nadia stayed long enough to hear what he said next. They tore across the street, running as fast as they could. They knew what would happen if Jared’s father caught them. The paramedics wouldn’t be able to identify them when their bodies were found. If their bodies were found.

The two of them ran for what seemed like hours. It had begun to rain. Nadia knew it would help to disguise them and any footprints they left behind. Since neither of them had packed raingear, they became soaked in minutes. Jared held her hand tightly. Nadia wasn’t sure if he was trying to reassure her or himself. Either way, she was glad he had decided to join her.

The rain finally stopped. By that time the two of them had reached the city. No one had stopped them on their way and both were sure they could hide amongst the crowds of people.

For almost a week they hid in the city streets. At night they slept next to trashcans outside of bars or restaurants. Their money went to buying cheap food that didn’t need to be cooked or heated up. Both knew that they couldn’t survive there forever.

“Maybe we should head towards Reject Boulevard,” Nadia suggested. “Neither of our families would go in there. They’re too freaked out by all the psychos…stupid yuppies.”

“They’re all yuppies!” Jared agreed. He smiled just enough so Nadia could see. “Then we go to Reject Boulevard!” They dodged around a bike messenger and turned in the direction of the oldest and worst part of the city.

Reject Boulevard was the city’s underworld. All the pimps, prostitutes, junkies, and other rejects of society lived or did business there. Nobody there could afford to move up and the masses kept coming. No one was safe in Reject Boulevard. No one went there voluntarily; only if they had no other choice. The reason Nadia had picked it was because it was the best hiding place for people who did not want to be found. At that moment, neither Jared nor Nadia wanted to be found.

Jared held Nadia’s hand as they slipped through the narrow, flooded streets. There were no cars around unless someone from the city had secret business. Nadia kept her eyes and ears open. She didn’t want to get attacked by anyone.

“At least we’ll be able to find cheap work out here,” Jared muttered darkly. “I don’t care how much anybody offers you; I don’t want you selling yourself.”

“I’m not that desperate yet,” Nadia argued. “Plus, I’m not ready to have sex quite yet. Maybe I’ll let you know when I am.”

“Thanks, but no thanks,” Jared teased. “C’mon. Let’s get out of the open. Someone will think we’re ‘lost’ and try and ‘take us in’.”

“This world sucks,” Nadia mumbled. Jared began coughing. He had acquired it a few days before, and already it was starting to sound bad.

“At this rate, you’ll die before we get anywhere,” Nadia commented. “Are you sure you don’t want to buy some cough syrup?”

“I’ll be fine,” Jared assured her. He covered his mouth as another fit started. “I’ve survived worse things. I think I can handle a little cough.”

“If you start coughing up blood, I’m taking you to a hospital,” Nadia threatened.

“No, not the hospital!” Jared cried, suddenly animated. “I hate hospitals!”

“I know,” Nadia sighed. “But it might be the only option we have besides letting you die.”

“Yeah, right,” Jared muttered. “Let’s go.”

They found an alleyway that was out of the way of any local drug dealers or pimps. Jared was still coughing. Nadia sat against him, trying to warm him with her body heat. When she finally fell asleep, it was a troubled sleep.

She woke to the sound of a crash. Her eyes flew open. Jared was on his feet, facing off against a man twice his size. The man was holding a piece of pipe. Nadia saw that Jared was defending himself with a trashcan lid.

“Just gimme the girl,” the man croaked. Nadia could tell that he was drunk, high, or a combination of the two. “An’ I’ll let ye go.”

“Like hell, stoner!” Jared growled. “Back off!” He brandished his lid and began coughing.

“Jared, I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Nadia whispered hoarsely. “He’s way bigger than you!”

“What you want me to do? Let ‘im have you?” Jared demanded angrily.

“No,” Nadia countered. “But I think we should run.”

“Better idea than mine!” Jared decided quickly. “Race you to Australia?”
“Last one there buys ramen,” Nadia challenged. They bolted away from the man, who shouted after them and attempted to give chase.

“Move it, little brats!” a haughty voice yelled as they dashed across the sidewalk. “Watch where you’re going!”

“Fuck off!” Jared called over his shoulder. He and Nadia ducked around a corner and kept running. For a long time they kept running. When both of them realized that no one was chasing them they stopped, slumping against a dumpster. Almost immediately Jared began coughing again. Nadia leaned against him.

“From now on, I say that one of us stays awake while the other sleeps,” Jared grunted. “That way, we won’t end up like that so easily again.”

“It’s your turn to sleep,” Nadia informed him quickly. “Don’t argue with me. I’m not going to sleep if you’re going to stay awake just now. Plus, I’m not sick.”

“Yet,” Jared corrected.

“Fine. Yet,” Nadia sighed. “Sweet dreams.”

“Those exist?” Jared asked in mock surprise.

“Not for us,” Nadia chuckled.

“That’s what I thought,” Jared muttered, trying to get comfortable.

They were fine for a while. Their situation gradually got worse. Nadia caught Jared’s cough, though hers seemed to move faster than his had. Jared’s cough got worse and he began coughing up a pinkish fluid that smelled terrible. Both of them were losing strength. Neither of them were in any condition to go anywhere. They stayed behind a dumpster in an alley that opened both ways. Even though they were sick they wanted to have a bolt-hole in case someone tried to hurt them.

One day, as they were walking, Jared suddenly began hacking and choking. He collapsed to the ground. Nadia struggled to stand him up again, but only managed to drag him a few feet before her own violent cough sapped what was left of her strength. She and Jared curled up next to each other and shivered.

“I guess it ends here,” Jared sighed. “Damn…Too bad we won’t be missed, huh?”
“Nah,” Nadia gasped. She coughed again. “Y’think there’s an afterlife?”

“Heaven or Hell?” Jared confirmed. “No…this is Hell enough, and if God exists and loves us as much as everyone says he does, why didn’t he help us?”

“So what is there after this?” Nadia wanted to know. “There’s got to be something. Right?”

“I guess it all depends on what you believe,” Jared mumbled tiredly. “At least now we won’t be tired…and we won’t be hurt. That’s the only good thing death offers.”
“Meh,” Nadia sighed. “I’m ready. Life sucks, and it’s way overrated.”

“You’re right, there,” Jared chuckled. “Come here. Gimme hug before we can’t move anymore.”

Nadia wriggled over to him and sank into his embrace. It felt good to know that somebody cared about her, even if he was dying right next to her. Jared was her real brother. She didn’t care what anyone else said.

She wasn’t sure how long she lay there fore. After a while Jared stopped coughing, though his breathing was as labored and raspy as hers. Her brain began to shut down, and she slowly lost awareness of her surroundings.

“Hey, look!” a voice with a heavy accent echoed in her head. “Do you think they’re alive?”

“Only one way to find out,” a deeper voice replied. Nadia wished they would be quiet. Their talking hurt her head. “This one’s breathing.”

An unfamiliar hand rested on her shoulder. Nadia’s instincts took over and she lashed out with nails fit to be claws. She felt skin tear beneath them. A moment later, the same hand enclosed her wrist gently.

“This one is definitely alive,” the deeper voice reported. “I don’t think she knows what she’s doing, though.”

“This one’s alive, too!” the first voice exclaimed. Nadia winced slightly. She opened her eyes and saw a very blurry blob of color. After she focused a little more the blob turned into a head and shoulders, and somewhere in there she saw an arm.

“Let’s get them inside,” the deeper voice suggested. “She’s freezing and delirious and we can’t even wake him up. They’re closer to death than to life…let’s go.”

“Right y’are, mate!” the first voice exclaimed. Nadia felt somebody pulling on Jared’s arm, trying to get her to let go. “Leggo, Sheila! C’mon, now. Leggo!”

“No,” Nadia gasped. “Stop…stop trying…to…to take him away.”

“We’re not gonna take him very far,” the first voice complained. “Leggo! You’ll get ‘im back when we get inside. I ain’t carryin’ both o’ya.”

“It’s okay,” the deeper voice told her. “We’ll keep you two together. We won’t separate you for longer than we have to. Okay?”

Something in his voice convinced Nadia that he was sincere. She let him pry her hand loose from Jared’s. A moment later she felt someone lifting her up, carrying her in arms that felt like steel pipes. His torso was frighteningly solid against her shoulder.

“Wh-who are…you?” she asked, so quietly she was sure he hadn’t heard her.

“Rod,” the deeper voice answered. “Who are you?”

“Nadia,” Nadia whispered. “Is…Jared okay?”

“Is Jared your friend with the red hair and the black hat?” Rod wanted to know. “He’s unconscious right now. We’ll warm him up and keep him safe. Don’t worry.”

Nadia lost the will to say more. Sleep took her and she plunged into blackness.

6