Most of the time, when people say that they like all kinds of music, they are lying. The phrase "I like all types of music," is usually followed by the word "except" and then the classifications of at least three different kinds of music. Of course, these people will try to justify their love for all kinds of music but those said three or so by saying that those three or so genres "just aren't real music," or something to that effect.

I am not one of these people. I honestly have never heard a shred of music that I didn't like. Be it classical, classic rock, soft rock, Latin rock, indy rock, alternative rock, punk rock, ska, Irish punk, Irish folk, folk, folk metal, death metal, metal, rap, R&B, jazz, pop, polka, marches, TV show and movie scores, funk, mariachi and disco. I like them all. I will pay someone more money then they can imagine if they can find a single bit of music that I do not like. Yes, that means I like Brittney Spears and others like her and my favorite TV show is American Idol. I'm not afraid to admit it.

I would give you my most prized possession if you could show me one bit of music I don't like. I don't think it's too tough to guess what my most prized possession is, considering my love of music, but in case it needs saying, my most prized possession is my iPod. I would go so far as to say I'd rather have to live my life going about my business naked than not have my iPod with me.

Now I wasn't one of the first people to get an iPod. In fact, I was far from it. Through my first two years of high school, I was pretty angry at people who had iPods. Not because I was jealous, but because of what their iPods turned them into. They became slaves to the small white rectangle in their pockets. My first iPod was actually a 60gb iPod video, the best of it's time. Even after I got it, I despised the people who went around all day who were slaves to their iPods. I never have been and never will be a slave to my iPod. I always have been and always will be my iPod's symbiote.

One of the reasons it took me so long to get an iPod other than my reluctance of becoming its slave was an issue of money. Well for a while I flipped burgers at McDonalds. After that I popped popcorn at the movie theater. And after that, I found something that really interested me in a job internship program at my school. I had always been interested in going into television, and my school set me up as a low-level intern at the local television station, mostly to help with covering the news. Basically, I just got the anchors coffee and donuts.

It was at that news station that I first saw a story that truly blew my mind. It was a story about how Apple just announced that in a year, they would be releasing the next model of all-knew iPods. You my find yourself asking what more Apple could do after the video iPod. No, it wasn't live TV. It was a completely new thing called the iThought. The iThoughts did away with the actual iPod structure. Instead, they were just two small white ear buds. These ear buds would be connected to an iTunes satellite, and would play whatever sort of music you thought of at the moment. Basically, it made your life have a sound track. Needless to say, I was thrilled.

The next six months were torture. But after that time, I took a break from my job and a semester off of school to camp out in front of Best Buy for the six months before the iThought was scheduled to come out. All I had was a tent, sleeping bag, pillow, money for food, and my iPod. It was all that I really needed.

After those six months passed, I was let into the store, a camera crew at my back. I was a little bit famous by then for the stunt I had pulled by camping out for six strait months. I got to the counter with my iThought, pleased with the fact that I would be the first in America to own one. I paid with my credit card and bolted out of the store. I could hardly wait to get outside before I ripped open the box and removed two small, metallic ear buds.

When I put those ear buds in it was like being born again. The sound quality was amazing, and the music was inspiring. I had finally found a place to keep all of the music I ever have or ever could want. The irony was that that place was somewhere that I had with me all my life: my head. All the iThought did was let me finally get it out, and like the advertisement said, have a sound track for my life.

Over the years I solidified my position at the news station. I became the main man to put things on the telepromter for the anchors to read, instead of just the guy who brought the coffee. The whole time I was accompanied by my iThought, and therefore, my life's sound track. It was in this job that I found my next big iPod news update.

I was working the telepropter and I could barely believe what I was typing. Apple was releasing another new iPod. This one was to be called the iFantasy. It looked just like the iThought, but in addition to playing the sound track to your life, it could read and manipulate your brain waves to make your wildest dreams happen right in front of your eyes. It then gave a release date, once again, a year after the announcement.

And once again, I put my life on hold and camped out for six months. I beat the other campers only by a day. So once again, I was first into Best Buy, and first in America to own the newest iPod. Once again, I was amazed by what it could do.

In the next few years, I lived through all my favorite movies. I became a star in every sort of music known to man and then some. I walked on all the planets and moons in the solar system, and even on the sun. I couldn't get enough of the iFantasy.

One day at work, I was sitting at the teleprompter. I had the article I was going to type in an envelope in my hand and I decided to sit back and have a nice stroll on Saturn's rings for the five minutes before the news broadcast. I sat back and relaxed in the chair, and didn't notice when the envelope in my hand fell open. I didn't notice when the news cast started. The anchors were left wordless when they should have been reading what had spilled out of the envelope onto the floor. It was a paper who's headline read:

BRAIN WAVE READING HARDWARE IN THE APPLE

IFANTASY CAUSES BRAIN ANEURYSMS.