From Fear Through The Eyes Of Madness

Commentary on APOLLO SLEEPS

It’s pretty much all Andrew’s fault. I knew the previous story I had written was too long to submit, and to be truthful I didn’t feel much like putting my feelings for it down in words. On the way out of a workshop class Andrew said he might think about doing a story of someone’s life flashing before their eyes, a little like “Falling/Floating” a short story by Henrik Boejen that we had looked at in seminar some weeks earlier.

The idea really gripped me and I thought about it all the way home on the train, although it wasn’t until the end of the week that I finally sat down with my laptop and started to type. I didn’t stop until gone midnight. The lack of sleep might explain the heavy editing I had to do to the later part of the story. The beginning sequence, and the section where Apollo dies were both heavily influenced by Chuck Palahniuk’s “Fight Club”, both the novel and the film which I adore. His story too opens near what appears to be the end of the main characters life, with a gun in his mouth. He can’t think of any last words either.

The character of Apollo (and the story was originally simply called APOLLO) was influenced by the latest Coheed and Cambria album which I was listening too a lot at the time I was writing. The album “Good Apollo, I'm Burning Star IV, Volume One: From Fear Through The Eyes of Madness” not only gave me the main characters name, but the song “Apollo I: The Writing Writer” influenced the character’s nature: kind by natural disposition but easily and heavily influenced by more volatile and dangerous people and substances. Apollo was a normal child/teenager/man, but it is hinted at that he has less conscience than most. The lyrics of the song, in various stages, also influenced Apollo’s behaviour towards his girlfriend and the way he treats here, cheating on her so unthinkingly.

I wrote Apollo Sleeps because it begun to pray on me in my waking hours, and eventually the ones I managed to sleep during. I decided I was being told something and so I wrote the story. I had put it off because the idea was originally someone else’s and I didn’t want to steal another’s raw material. But by Friday, Apollo, his death, his life and his friends were starting to drive me mad, and so I wrote.

I didn’t start with a plan of Apollo, I just started writing. Eventually (around 10.30pm) I had to go through and list the scenes I had written and their order. When I was done and had slept I went back and strolled through the grammar and the million and one spelling errors. I decided to see what Apollo would look like in “story” or chronological order. I told all the flashbacks in order, from the ones where he was youngest, up to the most recent. I idea was to create a more cohesive vision of the actual plot of the story and the reasons why Apollo was about to die. The effect was actually negative. I did not mention Apollo’s age in every scene (for that would be un-creative, repetitive and dull) but often I mentioned that he was older or younger than he was in the previous scene. In the new order these references made no sense, and so I put each scene back to its original point in the story.

The workshop session to which I brought Apollo basically helped me shape the story from a sketch to some kind of almost finished creation. There were small cuts, the odd word here or there and one long sentence that was removed completely due to confusing continuity errors. The biggest problem everyone seemed to have was the sub plot of the story, which explains why Apollo dies. The group found it both obscure and confusing and there didn’t seem to be enough continuity in the various descriptions or enough reasons to justify such a harsh reaction. Due to these comments I added two short scenes with Apollo’s girlfriend Elaine, the one in which she yells at him and the one where she finds him in bed with his latest drunken conquest.

I made sure to mention only two other characters apart from Apollo specifically. One is Elaine, his girlfriend and childhood friend and sweetheart. The other is her un-named brother, the lanky goth, Apollo’s best friend and his eventual murderer. I feel that this helps to distinguish the sub plot from the general flashback sequence. The idea of this is that just before Apollo dies, instead of random flashes of his life, or even the whole of it (which would be long and probably quite dull) into his head come both random, moments of pain or delight, and the times of his life that influenced and lead to his demise.

The title was the matter of some debate. Originally “Apollo”, it was changed by me briefly to “Good Apollo” as a sort of ironic statement that fitted it’s main influence better. But it was Simon with his views on the cyclical nature of life and death who struck upon the final title of “Apollo Sleeps”, a reflection of the last lines of the story.

While I am happy with “Apollo Sleeps” as a semi-finished piece I remain disappointed with my inability to express my chosen sub plot with more clarity without actually spelling it out in plain words. I have learned that chronology doesn’t suit all stories and that a mass lack of characters can actually enhance a specific few. Where I am I going now? Into the future. One which dearly departed Apollo cannot share.

Influences:

Suggestion of life flashing before eyes story from Andrew

Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk

Coheed and Cambria album: Good Apollo, I'm Burning Star IV, Volume One: From Fear Through The Eyes of Madness