You’ll never see me cry

I am masked behind myself
My other self.
You can never see me cry
Until my mask has fallen back
To reveal an uncertain child,
Crying in the midst of strangers.
But you are no stranger,
I know you so very well,
You’ll never get to see me cry,
Never get to see any weak part of me
That is shown to others.

When I ask for a shoulder,
I never receive any,
So I see no point in crying.
The only comfort I receive when I cry is my diary
No-one comes by to give me a hand,
To offer sympathy to this child.
She’s scared, lost and confused
As she sits in front of you crying.
But no tear falls unknown from my eye,
Because I’ll never let you see me cry.

A tear for you,
A tear for them,
A tear for the child
Who holds herself to stay strong.
Unable to speak in rational tones
A throat choked up by the invisible hands who beckon my tears,
Yet I will not succumb to them for you.