I never quite understood,

The impact of silent pain.

But when your poison penetrates,

It’s silence I start to gain.

Lying motionless,

Breathing in the gracious air.

Since no one else provides me,

Necessities that show they care.

But it plagues me,

As I walk in my porcelain shell of envy,

And no one spares a second glance.

I looked down on you,

From my pedestal of plaster,

But now see irony in circumstance.

Chorus

I don’t deserve a best friend,

And I was the last one to know.

Secrets intertwined in sin,

Don’t seem to want to let go.

So I lie and pretend,

As I wait for the end of,

Something I can’t identify.

Oh, why don’t I feel alive?

Oh, why don’t I feel alive?

I see your packs,

Of tightened bonds.

I stand behind the velvet rope,

Epiphany slowly dawns.

I have company around me,

But they are just witnesses.

Of my own decomposition,

And solemn listlessness.

You see me laugh,

But it’s a sarcastic sneer,

At how my life is progressing.

I hate all of these relations,

And acquaintances,

Over which I am obsessing.

Chorus

Give me a purpose,

Give me a life.

Give me a reality,

Or give me a knife.

Just give me what I need to move on.

An antidote, or steroid to be strong.