Maybe I’m scared to remember
Maybe I’d rather forget
But the memory will stay forever
Along with my regret

My life’s been messy
Stained with my many tears
And soon I find that I’m confessing
My pain from the past thirteen years

Again I felt the pressing feeling
Of overwhelming sadness blue
And until you’ve felt that salty sting
I’ll hide my tears from you

My sorrow is deeply buried
Where no one can ever find
The scars that I have carried
And the tears that I have cried

I stand outside in the rain again
So the raindrops hide my tears
But nothing can ever mend
The scars from all my peers

The medication numbs me
As I lay awake at night
Afraid that if I move or speak
I might begin to cry

The days seem to blend together
As the year begins to progress
And it seems like its been forever
Not one day more or less

Soft music plays through my head
As I listen through my cd player
But I feel like I’ve been dead
Forever and maybe later

Its like I’m living a lie to myself
To my family and to my friends
But there’s no other way I could’ve dealt
Than to make all the ends meet ends

Quietly screaming for someone’s help
But no one seems to hear
Its almost as I’m by myself
Having nothing to hold dear

My friends have forgotten me so soon
They still laugh and have a good time
And among my family my name’s taboo
Without it mentioned everything’s fine

Maybe they never loved me
Could I ever love them back?
Did they maybe find it soothing
When my heart went slack?

I guess I was alone after all
And I guess no one ever cared
And I guess no one ever saw
That this tough Asian chick was scared

My bitterness and pain towards life
Was induced by the fact that I was alone
Maybe if the situation had been different I might
Have still been alive instead of dead and all alone