history
this is me inside my head

shredding papercuts
and the criss-cross of your smile
forms a jagged x i want to tear ap ar t

(all we need are knives and wine)
let's get this party started
self-infatuation humiliation
you know they say you can't win
until you fail so let's crash and
burn and admire the bourbon flames
slicked red down our throats and
(all we need are knives and wine)

a glass heart you could break
spindle throat like a coronary vein
(block it with your drowning promises
and we'll laugh as the cells start dying)
a lack of oxygen in your kiss
suffocation made thick like wine
(oh, sweetness, i'm only joking, like
placebo my anti-drug sugar pills)

this is me laughing because it's so easy
when you're all alone and splitting smiles
down the center aisle walk sullied miles
in ideas you thought were for someone else
(you never saw yourself in white more than
torn black eyeliner and sky-slicked skin)
and i'm laughing i should have known better
to expect things would work out right for once

maybe it's my last chance to say
i live in patterns: look, chase, catch
i live in shatters: drop, fall, away
maybe it's my last chance to hope
you'll find someone else to torment
(a you a me a someone different i don't care
i'll probably imagine a supermodel and place her with you)

and i'm looking at the look on your face
and laughing because it's so predictable: all this
that i'd be bored and yet not able to let go
that i am creating drama for the sake of it

and losing control again
is just another pattern
is just another same old
(the same as knives and wine
glass choking sugar pills:
all i need to tear apart)

shredding dollar bills
and the numbers of the presidents
spell yours i know by heart

4-4-06

© 2006 silverdream139