I was swinging on the porch swing one cool, summer evening, the air alive with the sounds of birds singing, bugs humming, and the grass swaying in the slow breeze. The sun was setting to the right of the house, casting a shimmering gold across the endless miles of fields. A cow moaned somewhere behind the house, and an occasional twirp from a chicken followed soon after. I couldn’t help but giggle to myself, remembering my romp with chasing the chickens earlier that morning.

Pa hadn’t been very happy about that.

I sighed and ignored the sounds of the farm, closing my eyes, letting my mind wander across the fields towards the never ending world before me. Everything seemed so distant, but so reachable at the same time. How easy it would be to just leap off the porch and starting running across the land, never stopping until I found somewhere far away from here. Far away, with no more farm animals or loneliness or...

Ma came out of the house and sat down beside me, breaking the trance I had curled into. She placed a tall glass of milk in my hand and together we swayed with the breeze, not speaking a word, just taking it all in. Inside the house, the radio was blaring with the evening news, my father’s cusses soon following. I squinted my eyes, trying to block out the noise, but it seemed near impossible.

Ma reached over and placed a hand on my knee, a rare smile embracing her frail face. I reached out and grasped her fingers between my own and whispered under the wind.

“Let’s run away Ma. Let’s get away from this horrible place! Run away and never come back! Run across the fields, across the streams, and-”

She silenced with me with just a squeeze of her hand. Then, she carefully stood up, gently tugging me after her. I followed quickly, my hand having to reach up a bit to hold hers. She always seemed so tall to me, so strong and powerful. I gazed at her with awe on my face, thinking what a wonderful woman she was.

Ma walked down the stairs of the porch and into the grass outside. She fell to the ground amongst a clump of weeds in the middle of the yard. I landed next to her and together, we lied amongst the dirt, the grass, and chirping crickets. Everything seemed so peaceful.

Above us, the sky danced with brilliant sunset colors, and the stars began to twinkle between the lights.

“Sometimes,” Ma whispered. “When it’s warm enough outside, I come out here and lie in the grass, watching the sunset. See the stars up there?” she pointed towards the sky. “Those are guiding lights.”

“Guiding who?” I asked. Ma smiled again, and my heart swelled happily.

“Guiding those who seek peace. Who want a world of tranquility. A world of love. Those are the lights guiding us to Heaven.”

She pointed in the opposite direction, where the moon was starting to appear. I turned back to face her.

“And there,” she whispered even softer. “Is the moon. It’s a beacon to those here, that even in the darkest times, through the coldest nights, it will shine brightly and show the way for those that are searching.”

“But sometimes the moon is covered up.” I pointed out. Ma laughed gently.

“Yes, sometimes it is. But it’s always there. And if you look hard enough, you can always see it shining through the things that hide it. Sometimes, there’s darkness all around you, and no matter how hard you try to get away, or run, it always seems to be wherever you are, following you.”

Then Ma’s eyes swelled with tears. I threw myself across her chest and held her tightly, my heart beating furiously with her pain.

“Mama don’t worry! Please don’t cry!” I begged. Ma hugged me tightly to her, running her fingers through my golden hair. As golden as the fields.

“The sun is a promise of life. It helps things to live, grow, and flourish. The moon is the light through darkness.” She looked me straight in the eyes. “No matter what happens honey, that light is always shining to lead you away to a better world.”

We lay in the grass until the sun had completely set. Together, listening to the world around us, I breathed in the chilly night air, my eyes straying to the sky above me. There, shining just as brightly as the sun, was the moon. The breeze picked up slowly, the grass twitching around us. I smiled to myself and closed my eyes, my mind wandering away, across the fields, away from the farm, away from father, and towards a world dotted with brilliant light, where it was always shining, keeping away the darkness. There, in front of me inside my eyes, were little lights dancing across the black. And even through the darkness, I could see light peering in from the outside.

“Mama…” I whispered softly.

“Yes?” she asked.

I smiled. “I think I found Heaven.”