Just a little author's note: This is a script that I am working on for a comical series based on a guy who finds himself accepted into a group of girls. The format is NOT of a novel but of a script because hopefully I will be able to get it on to the screen. Some feedback would be greatly appreciated.

For those that may not know: (O.S.) stands for OFF SCREEN and (V.O.) stands for VOICE OVER

P.S. (As requested by korg-master) Do not read in school. SERIOUSLY FUNNY CONTENT!!

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DIARY OF A WOULD-BE GIRLFRIEND: EPISODE TWO

THE BLOOMING OF FRIENDSHIP

EXT. HIGH SCHOOL GROUNDS - DAY:

Several students are around in different parts of the school grounds.

A shadow of a man cross over them.

They look up and look towards it.

The shadow has no host and walks amongst them. Eventually every one turns to watch it.

The shadow stops and glances back at them.

CONSCIENCE (O.S.)

What’s wrong?

TROY - owner of the shadow - turns to his CONSCIENCE who hovers over his shoulder.

TROY

I can’t go by unnoticed anymore.

INT. CAFETERIA:

Troy peers into the Cafeteria and glances around. He doesn’t recognize anyone and sighs with relief.

He makes his way inside towards an empty table.

He puts his bag down on the table and then heads over to the Cafeteria counter.

TROY

Tea with milk please.

The Cafeteria lady bows her head and proceeds to prepare it.

CONSCIENCE (O.S.)

Does it satisfy you when you run from your problems?

The Conscience walks along the counter and stops in front of Troy.

TROY

It makes life easier to bear with.

CONSCIENCE

Why?

TROY

Because I don’t have to deal with them.

CONSCIENCE

Why?

TROY

Because dealing with them only serves to give me even more problems.

CONSCIENCE

Why?

TROY

Because I screwed up.

CONSCIENCE

Why?

TROY

If you say “why” one more time I’m gonna drop kick you out the window.

CONSCIENCE

Whyyyyyyy... don’t you apologize to her?

TROY

It’s not that simple. She’s always put up with my outbursts before but this one was different. I yelled directly at her. Before she just happened to be in the cross fire. I don’t think she’d want to have anything to do with me after that.

CONSCIENCE

She’s put up with you for a lot longer. I’m sure if you merely swallowed your pride and apologized you’d see that she will forgive you.

The cafeteria lady brings the tea and Troy pays for it. He heads back towards the table.

TROY

It’s not pride. Why would it be pride? It’s common sense. A person can only have so much tolerance.

CONSCIENCE

Uh-huh...

TROY

Look, you may not believe me but I should damn well know what are the reasons that compel me to do certain stuff.

The Conscience grins.

TROY

On second thought - ignore the fact that I ever said that.

Troy arrives at the table and looks out the door of the Cafeteria.

MELANIE and her FOUR FRIENDS are approaching.

There are two girls in front of them. One is wearing a SKIRT.

Troy, in a frantic panic, leaves his Tea on the table and grabs his bag. He hides under the table.

CONSCIENCE

And the reason for that was?

TROY

(Hiss)

Shut up and just pray that they don’t sit at this table!

Two chairs are pulled aside which startles Troy.

Melanie looks around the room and is rather disappointed. She sees an empty table across the room.

The table where Troy was sitting has the two girls who were in front of Melanie.

MELANIE

(To others)

There’s a free spot over there.

The group takes a seat at the empty table.

SAMANTHA

What’s wrong Mel? You seem a little lost today.

MELANIE

I haven’t seen Troy in three days. I thought I would meet him here.

ALISON

If I were you - I’d say good riddance to him. I’ve never seen someone lose his temper as he did before. Not even my dad does that.

MELANIE

But Alison, you don’t understand him as well as I do. He’s really a gentle person and doesn’t like to hurt anybody - physically or emotionally.

VICKI

From what we witnessed that day he could have fooled us.

TORI

Troy is the type of person that chooses to allow reaction to take over him when he doesn’t know what to do next.

ALISON

You hardly know him Tori and yet you want to defend him?

TORI

We made the mistake of roping him into a situation which he was unaccustomed to. When we demanded too much from him he refused to handle such stress rationally. This is why I defend him, because in his shoes I would have probably done the same. We are as alien to him as he is to us.

SAMANTHA

You have a point. We did put him on the spot that day. But still, what can we do about it now? It’s clear that he doesn’t want to be in the same room with us.

Troy is pressed up against the leg of the table, trying to take slow breaths to avoid drawing attention to him.

The girl in the skirt folds one leg over another and her leg is revealed.

FOCUS ON LEG

Psycho horror music. The leg is covered in lots of hair.

Troy’s eyes bulge and he holds his breath as he sees the leg.

TORI (O.S.)

We give him time. Let him come to his senses first.

Tori looks over at everyone around the table.

TORI

In the meantime we have to acknowledge that we were just as much at fault as he was.

MELANIE

If Troy eventually shows himself maybe we can all sort this out.

The SCHOOL BELL RINGS.

Melanie sighs and gathers her stuff.

MELANIE

If I don’t see you later today, I’ll see you guys tonight. Don’t forget to bring your favorite ingredients for your pizza.

She cracks a weak smile and then leaves.

The others give one another a worried glance and then watch her leave the room.

Afterwards they slowly leave the Cafeteria as well.

The two girls sitting at Troy’s table remain where they are. Short pause.

Troy suddenly bursts out from under the table, startling the two.

TROY

Good God woman! Shave those legs of yours!

The girl is taken aback in horror. Her hand nudges the cup with the Tea.

She glances at it and then glares at Troy.

She grabs it.

TROY

Oh no! Don’t throw-

She throws the steaming tea at Troy’s face. He grabs his face and falls to the ground writhing in pain.

The two girls rise from their seat and storm off.

The Conscience walks atop the table’s surface with an open note pad and pen in his hands.

FOCUS ON NOTE PAD

On the note pad is a list of silly DO NOTs (such as DO NOT shave the family cat...) and most of them are crossed out.

The Conscience goes down along the list and comes across, DO NOT criticize a woman’s unshaven legs.

He crosses it out.

CONSCIENCE

It’s like playing Bingo. All I need is one more: DO NOT fully give your trust away.

The Conscience is suddenly dismayed.

CONSCIENCE

Oh damn. That’s near impossible to achieve with you.

TROY (O.S.)

Somebody, call an ambulance! It burns!

CONSCIENCE

Oh quit your whining! It wasn’t even body scarring!

SEAN then walks into view. He glances down at the floor.

SEAN

Hey Troy what are you doing down there? I hope you didn’t slip on that puddle. If you did you should watch where you are going more carefully. I hardly ever fall or trip over. I hear it can be pretty humiliating. Is this humiliating? Never mind. What are you doing next lesson?

(He looks up thoughtfully)

I think I may stick around and do some more Chemistry. But then again I could do with a game of Table Tennis. Or maybe blah, blah, blah...

His voice drowns out as he continues to repeat the same word.

TROY (O.S.)

I rescind my last request and plead for a loaded gun.

INT. SECOND FLOOR CORRIDOR:

Alison is waiting by the stairs, tapping her foot impatiently.

Samantha looks over the balustrade to see if anybody is coming.

SAMANTHA

I still don’t see her.

ALISON

I wonder what is taking Vix so long?

The sound of frantic running can be heard.

Alison and Samantha look down the hall and see Vicki running towards them.

She stops before them struggling for breath.

VICKI

I... I... am... am so... sorry. Was... was... held up... in class.

SAMANTHA

At least you’re here now.

ALISON

Right.

VICKI

So... what are we going to do about Mel and this Troy fellow?

SAMANTHA

She’s rather upset that he won’t speak with her.

ALISON

I still don’t agree that it was my fault that caused it, but maybe we can fix things.

VICKI

How?

ALISON

We need to get them together to talk again.

SAMANTHA

But if he knows we’re involved he won’t even give her a chance.

VICKI

So how are we going to work this out?

ALISON

Tonight. Mel said he lived down the street from her. Our opportunity will come tonight. Maybe we can get him to loosen up as well.

SAMANTHA

Maybe.

VICKI

If any of us have any other ideas we must get in touch with one another.

ALISON

Right. We all have each other’s cell number. If anything comes up just give a ring.

Samantha and Vicki nod their head in acknowledgement.

VICKI

I got to go now. Class is due to start any minute.

SAMANTHA

Same here.

ALISON

We’ll meet later.

The three leave in separate directions.

INT. CLASSROOM:

A lecturer is talking to the class, reading from a book and pointing to the white board behind him with a marker pen.

On the white board is written: “History of Philosophy - Old guys who thought stuff.”

Troy is sitting back in his chair, deep in thought.

TROY

I haven’t been able to think straight ever since that outburst.

CONSCIENCE (O.S.)

You’re telling me.

The Conscience is dressed up in flamboyantly colorful clothes. He shakes them off and is back in his usual uniform.

Troy sighs and glances at the white board. On it is now written: “The Refrigerator light - Proof Vs Faith”

TROY

Maybe I deserve this?

CONSCIENCE

Putting yourself down doesn’t really help to improve the situation.

Troy closes his eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose.

TROY

I don’t think there is anything I can do to improve the situation.

CONSCIENCE

Oh there is one thing, but you’re too stubborn to admit it.

Troy opens his eyes and sinks into his chair. On the white board is now written: “Existentialism - Depressing yourself on purpose.”

TROY

Why can’t I just disappear into the shadows like I used to? Nobody would care if I vanished. But now, no matter where I go, there will always be somebody who will notice me.

CONSCIENCE

But that doesn’t have to be a bad thing. Only you see it as something that is awful.

The SCHOOL BELL rings. The students pick up their stuff and file out of the classroom.

Troy slowly gathers his own stuff and heads out of the classroom after the lecturer.

INT. SECOND FLOOR CORRIDOR - CONTINUOUS:

Troy is dismally walking down the hall. He stops and glances out a window to the courtyard out front.

TROY

But I don’t want to be noticed. When I was a loner I was left alone and I was comfortable with that.

CONSCIENCE

But you were even comfortable with Melanie’s company, or had you forgotten that?

TROY

I was.

CONSCIENCE

Don’t you mean “am”.

TROY

Was. I made a right fool of myself remember? I told her I didn’t want to be around her. You think that’s gonna blow over so easily?

CONSCIENCE

Well, how about we find out. She’s coming down the hall as we speak.

TROY

What?!

Troy spins round as sees Melanie down the hall heading in his direction. She hasn’t noticed him yet.

Troy furtively glances around himself and sees a bathroom. He ducks inside.

Melanie spots him disappear inside.

She approaches, peers inside and then walks in.

FOCUS ON SIGN

It says “Ladies”

INT. FEMALE BATHROOM - CONTINUOUS:

The room is spotless and has four cubicles.

MELANIE

Troy?

Three of the cubicle doors are closed while one is open.

Melanie peers under the doors of the three closed ones.

MELANIE

Troy, I saw you come in here. All I want to do is talk. Please come out.

Silence.

Melanie sighs.

MELANIE

I just want you to know that I don’t hate you for the way you acted, but if you still want to ignore me, then I can abide by that.

She turns to the bathroom exit. As she steps out she bumps into the same GIRL WITH THE SKIRT.

They pardon themselves and Melanie leaves bitterly while the girl walks towards the open cubicle.

She closes the door behind her.

Above her, arms and legs spread in a secured position in the ceiling, is Troy.

His Conscience is looking around the room.

CONSCIENCE

Haven’t you noticed that in comparision to the Men’s lavatories this is always presentable? What gives?

TROY

(Whisper)

I’m a bit busy right now.

The girl lifts up the toilet seat.

Sweat begins to form on Troy’s brow.

The girl goes to pull her skirt down.

A droplet of sweat runs off the tip of his nose and falls on to her head.

The girl stops, confused by the feeling.

Even more sweat begins to form on Troy’s brow. More drops fall from his face.

The girl seems like she is standing under a rain shower. She goes to look up at the ceiling.

WHITE FLASH

Troy has little droplets of sweat on his forehead.

The girl is about to pull down her skirt. She starts to.

TROY

Oh God!

Troy removes one arm to cover his eyes. Immediately after he falls down.

FROM OUTSIDE OF CUBICLE

The girl screams as Troy falls down with a thud. The lid of the cistern can be heard being lifted and then dropped. CRACK!

Troy drops to the ground as pieces of the cistern fall around him.

The girl storms out, adjusting her skirt.

CONSCIENCE (O.S.)

You should learn to behave yourself.

TROY (O.S.)

(Pained)

I should learn to invest in some armor.

Just then, Sean turns up outside the cubicle, looking inside at Troy.

SEAN

Hey Troy. What are you doing now? You know you shouldn’t be sitting on the floor in here. Who knows what bacteria could be where you’re sitting. It’s very unhealthy. I take pride in my health, you should too. You’d think it was common sense-

TROY (O.S.)

Sean... I have one question before you go on.

SEAN

Go ahead.

TROY (O.S.)

What are you doing in the girl’s bathroom?

SEAN

I could be asking you the same thing. Are you a pervert? I don’t like perverts. Perverts are disgusting. They think peeping on women is cool. I would never peep on a woman. Not at all. Everybody needs their privacy. Can you imagine how a person would feel if somebody kept bothering him? I’d be surprised if he could cope. But then again it depends on the person... Blah, Blah, Blah.

As before, his voice becomes distant as he repeats the same word.

TROY (O.S.)

If I wedge my head into this toilet can you do me a last favor and pull the flusher?

CONSCIENCE (O.S.)

Sure!

INT. CAFETERIA:

Melanie is sitting at a table with Tori.

MELANIE

Troy made it clear. He wants nothing to do with me anymore.

She sighs miserably.

Behind her is the girl in the skirt with some friends. She is showing, with body movements what she did to a “pervert”. She even adds a few wrestling movements into the mix.

TORI

I think you may still be jumping to conclusions.

MELANIE

Jumping to conclusions? He fled the moment he saw me approaching. How could that mean anything differently?

TORI

Do you remember when you walked in on your boyfriend and his friends while he held a lit cigarette in his hand.

MELANIE

Yes...? But how is this even relevant?

TORI

Do you remember what happened after?

MELANIE

I yelled at him because I didn’t like the idea that Doug had started smoking.

TORI

And what did you learn after?

MELANIE

The he was only holding it until one of his friends came back...

TORI

And what happened when you found it to be true?

MELANIE

I couldn’t look him in the face because of my embarrassment. Oh... You mean to say that Troy may be avoiding me like I did with Doug?

Behind her, the girl in the skirt is now rallying up her friends. With hand gestures she is distinctly showing that they must “crush” the “pervert”.

TORI

If Troy really wanted to have nothing to do with you, why run? Running is either an act of cowardice or guilt. Deep down he senses he did wrong and can’t get himself to face you.

MELANIE

So how do I fix things? Doug found me and apologized. If he hadn’t we would have never straightened things out and I fear we would have split up. I tried talking to Troy but he wouldn’t give me a chance.

TORI

If you remember, Doug wasn’t exactly having much luck with you either. The both of you had to accidentally bump into each other before you could say anything.

The girl in the skirt sends her friends off. Her friends charge off in a frenzy. She waits there with her arms crossed and a smug look on her face.

MELANIE

So I ought to wait and let things happen?

TORI

Not exactly. You don’t want to give the impression that you don’t care, otherwise it will be taken the wrong way and push him away further.

MELANIE

God why does this have to be so complicated? If only he told me that he was re-attending school. This wouldn’t have happened.

TORI

Don’t try to see where the blame lies. That would only help to distance you two even further. He has his own troubles he’s trying to deal with.

Just then the group of girls come back with Troy hog-tied to a long pole, being held horizontally. He has an apple wedged in his mouth.

The girl in the skirt leads them off in the opposite direction.

TORI (CONT’D)

If he senses that you may be blaming him or yourself he won’t approach you.

MELANIE

I understand. I just hope he’s doing okay.

Troy shuffles along the floor, still tied to the pole. A large number of hands grab the end of the pole and drag him back. He slides slowly back off screen.

MELANIE (CONT’D)

He can close himself off rather tightly and its hard to break him out of his shell again.

TORI

Just remember to take things a step at a time and hopefully the two of you can work things out.

MELANIE

I hope so too.

Melanie glances at her watch.

TORI

It’s almost time?

MELANIE

Yes. I better not be late.

TORI

Same here. I’ll see you later tonight.

The two rise out of their chairs and head for the Cafeteria exit.

FOCUS ON DOOR TO GAMES ROOM

Troy suddenly bursts out and slams the door shut behind him.

The door shakes and trembles as a large number of people try to break through.

TROY

What the hell is wrong with you - you Neanderthals!

The blade of an tribal axe splinters through the door, causing Troy to fall back with a startled yelp.

He scurries away across the floor and takes shelter behind a table. He peers over it and sees that their is no movement behind the doors.

His Conscience walks along the table surface beside his head.

CONSCIENCE

There is only one person to blame for all this.

Troy shoots him a glance.

TROY

Are you implying it’s my fault?

CONSCIENCE

Who’s else could it be?

Troy jumps up in protest.

TROY

Them! They barged into my classroom! Group tackled me! Strung me up! And just tried to sacrifice me to their pagan god!

CONSCIENCE

Well if I’m not mistaken the priestess was the same person you told to shave her legs and also the one you dropped in on uninvited in the bathrooms.

TROY

But that wasn’t my fault! I never intended for those to happen.

CONSCIENCE

Ah, but if you weren’t trying to hide from a certain someone you wouldn’t have found yourself in that mess. Therefore, looking at the root of the problem, you - my friend - are to blame.

TROY

How many times have I told you that I hate you?

CONSCIENCE

Eight million, four hundred sixty five thousand and thirty two times. And this is all in the beginning of this year.

TROY

You kept count?

CONSCIENCE

Well someone’s got to.

Troy grumbles irritatingly.

TROY

Still, I don’t agree with what your implying at. That course of action will only land me into greater grief.

CONSCIENCE

Says you.

TROY

Look I just don’t agree! I’m sure there is another that thinks similarly. In fact, I know there is. I want a second opinion.

CONSCIENCE

A second opinion? From who?

TROY

From my good conscience.

The Conscience is taken a back in alarm.

CONSCIENCE

The go- the good conscience? What makes you uh... think that maybe I’m not the uh... good conscience?

TROY

For the simple fact that you wear black and that symbolizes trouble and that you’ve landed me into trouble more than I can count. So I want to hear what he has to say.

CONSCIENCE

I don’t think its a good idea.

TROY

(Hiss)

Call him.

The Conscience sighs.

A small puff of smoke appears over Troy’s other shoulder. He glances at it and is stunned to see a door with a small note on it.

CLOSE UP ON NOTE

It is an eviction notice.

TROY

What the hell?!

He peels it off with thumb and forefinger and stares at it in disbelief.

CONSCIENCE

Well, you see, when you started paying more attention to me your good conscience slowly ran out of a job and could not afford to pay rent space.

TROY

Rent space?

CONSCIENCE

Yeah. We pay about ten pounds a month.

TROY

Wow that’s cheap.

CONSCIENCE

I know, but it doesn’t include the electricity and water bills.

TROY

That’s shame.

Troy suddenly realizes what he is talking about and shakes his head.

TROY

Hey! You can’t change the subject! What am I going to do now that I don’t have a good conscience?!

CONSCIENCE

Actually you still do.

Troy gives him a quizzical look.

CONSCIENCE

Because the position was no longer open I had to take on both roles. It’s damn hard when you need to give a set of advice that conflicts with your character.

TROY

Then what would you say if you were gonna give me bad advice?

CONSCIENCE

Dump the sorry bitch.

He grins mischievously.

TROY

Yup, that sounds like the proper you.

Troy sighs.

TROY

But still... Neither of the available options are any good for me.

CONSCIENCE

But why?

TROY

Because I do care for her and can’t get myself to truly forget her - not unless I had evidence that she wanted to move on without me in her life. And I cannot get myself to apologize to her because... because I really don’t have the courage to do so.

He starts walking glumly towards the exit.

The Conscience follows.

CONSCIENCE

Why?

TROY

Because when ever I lashed out on anyone else I knew, deep down, that I really wanted nothing to do with them. In fact it was more of a relief that I did lash out. But with her... I assumed that the effect would be the same, but I was proven wrong.

CONSCIENCE

Why?

TROY

I was found out! I didn’t know what to say or do. I reacted.

CONSCIENCE

Why?

Troy is getting annoyed.

TROY

Because I was hoping that I could ignore my actions and pretend it never happened.

They step out of the Cafeteria.

CONSCIENCE (O.S.)

Why?

TROY (O.S.)

Do you remember the warning I gave you last time?

CONSCIENCE (O.S.)

Why- Urk!

The sound of something soft being kicked hard is heard.

The Conscience shoots through the room towards an open window on the far side.

SPLAT!

He misses the open window and is plastered against the window pane of the one beside it.

He begins to gently slide down.

CONSCIENCE

Your... aim... sucks...

INT. FIRST FLOOR CORRIDOR - CONTINUOUS:

Troy walks away from the Cafeteria doors grumbling. He glances back for a short moment and then shakes his head.

Walking down the stairs leading to the next floor is Samantha. She sees Troy and hesitates.

TROY

No. It’s just unsettled ramblings.

Samantha takes a reluctant deep breath and then walks towards him.

SAMANTHA

What is?

Troy jumps with a start. He is shocked to discover Samantha wishes to speak with him.

TROY

Sam! Jesus you scared me.

SAMANTHA

I’m surprised you still remember my name. I thought you’d want to forget us.

TROY

Believe me I’ve tried.

Troy cringes as he realizes he let that comment slip.

Outside, seen through a window, a GRAVE DIGGER standing in the soil scoops up a shovel full of dirt.

Troy tries to cover up his mistake.

TROY (CONT’D)

Not that it’s easy to forget you.

Another scoop.

TROY (CONT’D)

Not that I am implying you have any features that makes it easy for me to distinguish you from others!

Another scoop.

TROY (CONT’D)

Not that I was insinuating that you didn’t look good enough to stand out of a crowd.

Another two scoops.

TROY (CONT’D)

Not that I was just trying to hit on you just now!

The grave digger throws down the shovel and walks off screen. He then returns with an excavator and scoops out several mounds.

Samantha is giving Troy a cold glare.

The grave digger puts up a tombstone at the head of the grave. The name on it reads “Troy Sullivan”.

TROY

I should shut up now.

SAMANTHA

Reasonable idea.

Samantha draws another deep breath.

SAMANTHA

Look, I may not be too fond of you. In fact I doubt most of us are, but Melanie still holds you in high regards. Why don’t you just forgive and forget?

TROY

I... can’t.

SAMANTHA

Why not?

TROY

I don’t... I don’t have the courage to face her.

SAMANTHA

Does your friendship with her mean that little to you? Are you just going to keep avoiding her until it hopefully blows over?

Troy gets cross with such an accusation.

TROY

Is that what you think? That I couldn’t give a damn?! I’ll have you know that I love that girl! Love her as a sister! She means a lot to me! More than anything else on this miserable rock!

SAMANTHA

Then why don’t I believe you?

TROY

You don’t know me. You wouldn’t know me.

SAMANTHA

Is that so? Then explain to me why you haven’t done anything to rectify the situation.

Troy freezes at the sound of a loud bang.

A short while later the grave digger comes in pushing a two-wheeled trolley. He lifts a stiff Troy on to the trolley, tips his hat to Samantha and then wheels him out.

Samantha shakes her head with disappointment. She pulls out her cell phone from her hand bag.

SAMANTHA

Vicki? It’s me Sam. We’re gonna have to tell Alison to change the plans a slight bit. It’s definitely up to us now.

Behind her, the grave digger stops the trolley in front of the grave and tips it, dropping the still stiff Troy into it. The grave digger then grabs the shovel and starts filling the grave up.

EXT. HIGH SCHOOL GROUNDS - FLOWER BED - A LITTLE LATER:

Amongst the flowers is a clear patch with upturned soil. There is a headstone before it with Troy Sullivan’s name on it.

The Conscience stands to the side of it, staring at the ground. It has its arms crossed and is tapping it’s foot furiously.

TROY (O.S.)

(Muffled)

Don’t say it.

CONSCIENCE

And why should I waste my breath on that? It’s already quite obvious. You had it coming all along.

TROY (O.S.)

(Muffled)

Gee... Thanks for the moral support.

CONSCIENCE

Hey. If I wanted to, I could have acted as my original behavior dictated me to do so.

TROY (O.S.)

(Muffled)

Which was?

The Conscience drops on to its stomach laughing hysterically, with arms and legs banging on the floor.

TROY (O.S.)

(Muffled)

Of course...

The Conscience eventually stops laughing. It wipes tears from its eyes.

CONSCIENCE

So what you gonna do now?

The soil begins to rise and roll aside as Troy sits up.

Two FEMALE STUDENTS walking past the flower bed see the shape emerging from the ground. They scream and run, throwing their notes and books into the air.

TROY

Might as well head home and have a shower.

CONSCIENCE

I meant about Melanie.

TROY

I know what you meant. It doesn’t mean I have any idea in what I should do. Samantha proved a valid point. I’m no true friend to Melanie, not if I act this way.

CONSCIENCE

Then don’t act this way.

Troy lifts himself out of the ground.

TROY

It’s too late.

CONSCIENCE

It’s never too late.

TROY

This time... it may very well be.

He walks off, leaving his Conscience behind.

EXT. HIGH SCHOOL GROUNDS - ENTRANCE - CONTINUOUS:

Troy is heading towards the entrance gates, dragging his feet along the way.

TROY

The day can’t get any worse...

He glances ahead and immediately stops.

Blocking the gate is several women dressed in Tribal clothing. A WITCH DOCTOR aims a voodoo staff at Troy.

The Tribal women charge at Troy.

TROY

Oh fu-!

Troy runs in the opposite direction as the women give chase.

The Witch Doctor raises her mask. It is the girl with the skirt, grinning sinisterly.

FADE TO:

INT. TROY’S APARTMENT - NIGHT:

Troy is standing out on his balcony watching the rest of the world.

He sighs and then walks into the flat.

He slumps onto a sofa and stares at the ceiling.

TROY

God... When will this day end?

Suddenly his cell phone begins to ring.

He limply grabs it and checks the screen.

He has a message.

Opening it, he is surprised it is by Melanie. He abruptly sits upright as he opens it to read it.

The message reads: ‘I need to speak with you. It’s an emergency!’

Troy is alarmed at the message. He jumps to his feet and runs for the door to his flat. He goes to yank a coat off a wall mounted hanger as he runs past.

It snags and yanks him back, dropping him on to his back.

He quickly picks himself up and scurries removes the coat. He leaves the flat.

EXT. STREET - CONTINUOUS:

Troy, while jogging, slides on the coat.

CONSCIENCE

Whoa! Where’s the fire?

TROY

Melanie just sent me a message. It sounded important.

CONSCIENCE

You think she wants to patch up the friendship?

TROY

The message didn’t seem to imply that. It sounded a lot worse. I hope she’s okay.

CONSCIENCE

For somebody that believed there was nothing that could be done to repair the relationship, you’re quite prepared to aid her.

TROY

She is still my friend.

CONSCIENCE

Funny. Last time I could have sworn you had said was.

TROY

Is. If she is in trouble and I ignore it, I will never forgive myself! She’s stuck by me since we were children and a little tiff is not gonna destroy what we shaped.

CONSCIENCE

And all it took to get you to see sense was a message.

TROY

Not just a message. A message with too much urgency to ignore!

Troy is about to run past a block of flats.

ALISON (O.S.)

Troy! Hold up!

Troy stops and glances around, trying to figure out where her voice came from.

VICKI (O.S.)

We’re up here!

Troy looks towards the roof of the block of flats. He sees the girls (except for Melanie) looking back down at him from the roof.

The girls are all in pyjamas.

TROY

Where’s Melanie?!

SAMANTHA

She’s on her way down there. If you wait she won’t be long.

ALISON

Yeah. Just stand next to that mop so she can see you.

Troy glances at the road and sees a mop in the middle of it.

The girls giggle, except for Tori who is slightly confused.

TROY

Yeah. I’ll do that.

He walks over to it and begins to pace slightly.

TROY

I wonder what it is she wants. I hope its nothing to serious.

CONSCIENCE

You’re getting worked up over nothing. If she is on her way it can’t be too serious.

TROY

I guess you’re right. I have too much of a bad habit when it comes to fearing the worst.

Melanie walks around the corner and looks up. She is stunned to see Troy.

MELANIE

Troy!

TROY

Mel! You okay?

MELANIE

Uh... Yeah.

She is somewhat puzzled as she approaches him.

TROY

I’m relieved to hear that.

EXT. MEL’S HOUSE - THE ROOF - CONTINUOUS:

Alison pulls away from the short wall surrounding the roof and gives the others a sly grin.

ALISON

Quick! We have to get ready!

Samantha and Vicki nod with a grin of their own.

Tori watches them as they quickly scamper away from the wall.

TORI

Get ready? What are you talking about?

Tori’s eyes suddenly go wide. She gasps in alarm.

TORI

Are you insane!

EXT. STREET - CONTINUOUS:

Troy and Melanie are staring at one another in embarrassed silence.

Troy then clears his throat.

TROY

Mel, I want to apologize for being such a heel. I never gave you a chance when you had given me so many. I should have never lashed out at you as I did.

MELANIE

It wasn’t your fault. We didn’t realize how sensitive you would have been about the whole ordeal.

TROY

No. It was my fault. My behavior was inexcusable. I only wish I had the courage to tell you before things had gotten out of hand.

MELANIE

But they didn’t. You’re here now aren’t you?

TROY

True. It makes me feel silly for not having told you when I first bumped into you.

MELANIE

I can understand that you may have been embarrassed to tell me.

TROY

No. It wasn’t embarrassment. Well actually it may have been a slight bit. But if anything it was more of self-resentment mixed with shame.

Melanie gives him a quizzical glance.

MELANIE

Self-resentment?

TROY

I was supposed to go to University last year but I did not reach the global mark needed. I failed by one point. Before I knew what my results were I was glad to tell everyone that I was heading to Uni. It felt like I was making a promise - a promise to see all my classmates in a new school... a new adventure...

Troy glances away dismally.

TROY (CONT’D)

When I failed, it was as if I had let them all down... As if I broke that promise. I couldn’t bear to show my face after that.

MELANIE

But you returned - on your own accord! That has to count for something.

Troy turns to her.

TROY

I had to. After spending a year beating myself over the scores I knew I couldn’t let it get to me any longer. I had hoped to solely concentrate on my education, but I hadn’t banked on meeting you or having the probability of having the same classes.

MELANIE

I wouldn’t have expected as much either, but in the end it will be for your benefit. You have come back wiser and maturer. You don’t need to close yourself only on to your studies. You’re not alone. Your former classmates may not be here, but you can make new friends.

TROY

I had always feared that I would end up alone when I came back. I feared it more that day at the Cafe, but now I realize should have been baseless. I should have never felt ashamed and I should have known that you would have never mocked me and my set-back.

MELANIE

Exactly. I’m glad that you feel this way. I would have been greatly disappointed if we had a falling out.

TROY

Yeah. I’d have to say that if it wasn’t for your message I wouldn’t be here now.

MELANIE

My message?

TROY

Yeah. You know, the message you sent me.

MELANIE

I didn’t send any messages. I only came for the mop. I was surprised to have seen you waiting here.

TROY

Are you sure? I have it right here on my phone.

Troy starts to reach for his phone. He stops half way as he begins to sense something is wrong.

TROY

Wait a second... Why is there a mop in the road?

MELANIE

Alison had thrown it down. She got a little carried away.

TROY

Alison?

He begins to turn to look up towards the roof.

MELANIE

Yeah. We’re having a party on the roof and she had too much pizza and chocolate. It went straight to her head.

Troy stops, not yet having glanced up at the roof, and glances over his shoulder towards Melanie.

TROY

What I can’t understand is why she asked me to stand right next to it.

Troy looks up and his eyes snap wide.

A PIZZA comes right at him.

It SPLATS across his face, knocking him to the ground.

MELANIE

Oh my god!

Melanie jumps back in alarm, covering her mouth with her hands.

Troy sits up with Pizza all over his head.

Suddenly a large amount of WATER splashes over him, drenching him.

The Conscience walks into view and opens up the note pad with the DO NOTs and crosses the remaining one out.

He then punches a fist into the air.

CONSCIENCE

Bingo!

EXT. MEL’S HOUSE - THE ROOF - CONTINUOUS:

Tori stares down at the street in horror.

Alison, holding an empty plate, turns to Samantha and Vicki - both of which are holding empty buckets.

They high five one another.

EXT. STREET - CONTINUOUS:

Troy spits out water and pulls away some of the pizza from his face.

Melanie tries to stifle her urge to chuckle.

MELANIE

Are... you okay?

Troy gives her a look.

The pizza on his head is beginning to boil.

MELANIE

I swear I had no knowledge of this.

TROY

I don’t know why I bother some times...

MELANIE

I’ll make sure to tell them off. I promise. They shouldn’t have done that.

TROY

No that’s okay.

MELANIE

Are you sure? We can’t ignore this.

Troy gives her a sly grin, which at first startles her.

TROY

Oh, I’m still thinking of returning their gracious offer.

Melanie returns the grin as she understands him.

EXT. MEL’S HOUSE - THE ROOF - LATER:

Alison, Samantha and Vicki are leaning over the wall.

ALISON

Where did they go?

She glances at Vicki and Samantha who both shrug.

TORI

What in hell’s name possessed you to do that?!

ALISON

Oh, come on! It’s not as if you didn’t find it funny as well. You were laughing with us!

TORI

Guiltily I may add! I was more horrified than amused. Why on earth did you send that message?! To paint him as a target?!

ALISON

Well no. That wasn’t the plan. We wanted him to meet up with Melanie and hopefully sort things out. The pizza was an added bonus.

MELANIE (O.S.)

An added bonus that cost me my friendship with him!

Everyone turns round and sees Melanie standing in the door leading to the roof.

Near the door is a table full of food (pizza and bowls full of toppings)

Melanie seems furious and has tears in her eyes.

The girls are taken aback in shock when they see her.

MELANIE

Your thoughtless actions ruined everything! Because of you he assumed it was all a joke and stormed off!

SAMANTHA

That wasn’t our intention.

MELANIE

I don’t care what your intention was! You made a mess of things!

There is a slight movement in the shadows on the adjoining roof.

Tori catches a glimpse of it. She looks over and sees that the door leading on to the roof of the adjoining roof is wide open.

TORI

Huh?

VICKI

We didn’t think he would take it so badly. All we wanted was for him to speak with you. Alison had insisted on the rest for a little fun.

ALISON

Hey, don’t you go putting the blame on me.

A hand opens an outside tap while another slides a bucket (that Vicki and Samantha were holding) beneath it. It is filled three quarters of the way.

Tori hears the sound of the water and goes to investigate.

ALISON

If he couldn’t take the joke then it’s his fault. I was only trying to get him to loosen up.

MELANIE

You don’t understand! He’s not like us! He doesn’t react to our behavior as we do!

Tori leans over the wall into the adjoining roof. She sees the tap right below her. It is dripping.

A shadow passes behind her.

ALISON

Well how was I supposed to know he lacked a sense of humor?

TROY (O.S.)

You could have tried asking.

The four girls (Tori, Samantha, Vicki and Alison) are startled by his voice and spin round.

Troy is standing behind them with a bucket filled with water in his hands.

He gives them a sly grin.

Troy throws the water at Vicki, Alison and Samantha - soaking them. They scream as he does this.

Tori is surprised but can’t help chuckling.

Melanie bursts out laughing as they stand drenched in front of her.

MELANIE

That was well worth it!

VICKI

You knew of this?!

TROY

Of course she did. She’d make an excellent actress one day.

MELANIE

Manage to fool all of you long enough for him to get into place.

Alison grins.

ALISON

Oh, you’re gonna get it for deceiving us.

She nods at Vicki and Samantha who nod in approval with a grin of their own.

The three girls run towards the table, surprising Troy and Melanie. They each grab a handful of food and then throw it at Melanie.

She shrieks as she is covered in food. She then laughs and runs over to the table herself. A food fight ensues between her and the three girls.

They then turn their attention on to Troy. He shields himself with the bucket as they pelt him with food.

TORI

Don’t you think you guys are getting a little carried away? I mean look at the mess you’re making.

Everyone stops and looks around. They then exchange glances and grins. They look towards Tori.

Tori shrieks as food comes flying her way.

She runs towards the table as she is being bombarded by food.

Even Troy runs towards the table.

The food fight ensues for a little longer.

EXT. MEL’S HOUSE - THE ROOF - LATER:

Everyone is sitting at the table. They are all soaked and covered in food. The table hardly has any food left. Most of it has been thrown across the roof.

Everybody is breathless and smiling.

ALISON

(To Troy)

Well it looks like I had you pegged wrongly. You can be a lot of fun.

TROY

Well if it wasn’t for you girls I may have completely forgotten how to.

MELANIE

Does this mean you’d like to hang out with us more?

Troy nods his head.

SAMANTHA

I guess its good that we started afresh now. Our first impressions led us to believe a whole lot differently about this friendship.

Everybody agrees.

TROY (V.O.)

Admittedly I had once believed so as well. First impressions should never be the full basis of judgement on any relationship - be it amongst acquaintances, friends or romances.

He looks over the group of girls who are talking amongst themselves.

TROY (V.O.)

First impressions can be used as a foundation but sometimes it can be misleading. First impressions need to be taken into consideration but not completely believed.

Troy looks over at Melanie. She smiles at him and then squeezes his arm.

TROY (V.O.)

When one closes their mind on a first impression it leaves no room for the unexpected. Nobody is perfect and nobody is constant. We all change - either through error or through evolution. That ideal image of what we once held in high esteem or in utter scorn would no longer be the same.

He glances at the Tori who gives him a smile and a wink.

TROY (V.O.)

Mind you, it can sometimes avoid change. If the individual doesn’t allow it to take place or if their character has grown into a state of equilibrium, it will remain unchanged.

Troy turns his attention on to the other three girls. They are still talking amongst themselves.

He then sits back in his chair and stares up at the clear night sky.

TROY (V.O.)

Our personalities should try to achieve this balance - of good and bad behavior; Of sensible and care-free attitudes. Then... first impressions are a lot closer to the truth and can expect a lot more from the individual.

Troy sits up. The girls are discussing hair styles and make up. Troy crops an eyebrow in a bemused expression.

TROY (V.O.)

When did that conversation start up?

ALISON

I’m thinking of getting my hair straightened and maybe dying it. What color do you think would suit me?

SAMANTHA

I think you’d look good in a brownish red color or maybe even plum.

MELANIE

No, not plum. A lighter color would compliment your tan. Maybe hazelnut?

TROY (V.O.)

Although, it must be noted that trying to achieve a balance within the relationship can prove to be quite the challenge. It is necessary to form a healthy relationship but it can still be a difficult thing to muster. One must start small on grounds that they feel comfortable building upon and then expand from there.

ALISON

Oh Mel! I wanted to ask, before I forgot, when Doug had started smoking?

Melanie is horrified by the question. Even Tori is shaken up by it.

Samantha and Vicki cringe due to the tense situation that has now become apparent.

Troy crops an eye brow and glances at Melanie.

MELANIE

Doug doesn’t smoke.

Troy glances at Alison.

ALISON

Are you sure? I saw him the other day and he had a lit cigarette in his hands.

The Conscience, who sits on Troy’s shoulder, pulls out a big book titled “The Inner Thinkings Of Men”. It and Troy glance back at Melanie.

MELANIE

He... He promised me he wouldn’t smoke. He knows that I don’t like it.

The Conscience flips ahead through a few pages.

ALISON

He was with his friends smoking. I know what I saw.

The Conscience stops and flips back a few pages. It then traces a finger down the book.

CONSCIENCE

(Soto)

Fetish... Ferrets... Ah, friends.

TROY

How long were you watching him for?

ALISON

Huh?

Everyone looks at him.

TROY

How long?

ALISON

A few minutes. I wanted to make sure it was him.

TROY

Did you see him take a drag of that cigarette?

ALISON

Uh...

She hesitates.

ALISON

No, I don’t think so.

The girls are confused. Troy remains passive.

The Conscience flips through another set of pages.

CONSCIENCE

(Soto)

Acne... Aches... Acting. Got it.

TROY

So you didn’t at any point see him put that cigarette to his lips. Did he keep his hand which held it near his head or closer to his knee?

ALISON

It was on the table next to the ashtray.

TROY

Then that means knee. And you never once saw him smoke it?

ALISON

Yes. I already said that.

TROY

Then why accuse him of smoking?

The girls remain silent. Although distressed, Melanie senses some relief.

SAMANTHA

You have to admit Troy that somebody who holds a lit cigarette and not smoke it is a bit weird. Why would anyone do that?

TROY

Ah, but you see you’re only focusing on the outer appearance. It is true that on the outside it may seem he is smoking, after all that was the intention. But, if my guess is right, he hasn’t turned into a smoker.

VICKI

What makes you say that?

The Conscience pushes the book in front of Troy and taps a page. Troy nods his head.

The Conscience then closes the book and puts it behind it, making it disappear.

TROY

Now this is just a theory but is highly plausible from what I’ve gathered. This guy is only doing it for show. He’s never smoked a cigarette and doesn’t intend to.

ALISON

What makes you think that?

TROY

Are all his friends smokers?

MELANIE

Yes they are.

TROY

Then there you have it. He feels that because they smoke it challenges his masculinity and so tries to compensate it by pretending to smoke. For others it may seem silly or strange but for him it satisfies a need to be equal.

TORI

Definitely strange. And if he makes up excuses?

TROY

Wouldn’t you to avoid an embarrassment?

MELANIE

So he’s not smoking.

TROY

No. I wouldn’t think so. You may want to talk to him about it though. Approach him with the subject gently. Make him feel comfortable so that he doesn’t fear answering you. And definitely do it in private.

MELANIE

I will. Thanks. At least hearing all this has given me some relief.

TROY

Glad to have helped.

ALISON

So how did you figure all that out?

TROY

It is assumption mostly, but I am a guy and sometimes we all act alike in certain ways.

ALISON

In that case... can you explain what why a guy says “I love you” and then stop calling you?

VICKI

Yeah! Or why a guy doesn’t like to be Romantic!

SAMANTHA

Or why they boast about their sexual exploits!

The three lean into Troy, waiting for an answer.

Troy is anxious as he wonders what he’s gonna do next.

TROY (V.O.)

So this is it... my niche to grant my the stability into this circle - revealing the darkest secrets of Man-kind. If only they knew. But seriously. They are only a few theoretical answers just to satisfy their curiosity. I mean, what’s the worst that can happen?

FADE TO:

EXT. STREET PARADE - DAY:

SUPER TITLE: 10 YEARS LATER...

Only women line the sidewalks, cheering as men in nothing but loin cloths and chains drag their feet dismally through the street.

They are pulling a large golden chariot with the EMPRESS (the girl with the skirt).

The chariot is pulled through the street. Behind it is another float. It is a statue of Troy covering his mouth as if he gave too much detail.

A sign beside it says: “Traitor to all Men...”

FADE OUT.

THE END.