A/N This is no longer a spoiler so here it is again. Yeah I don't know what is up with me this week but I can't seem to write a word for Freaks, and I keep working on other stuff... I think this is the third story I post this week...

Also I don't like the name Freaks to you, so if anyone thinks of a better name let me know! Please review.

Is it hard to believe I remember things from when I was a toddler? Not what people have told me but actual memories? See everything about your mother has been burned into my brain and heart.

“Hi” She was a small girl bright red hair short like boys, beautiful green eyes, you had the shape of her eyes. I knew it was a girl because of her dress and her soft voice. But back then I was only four and could careless about her beautiful eyes and her soft voice I came to notice those when it was too late to let her know about it, when I had already destroyed her.

I stared back at her scrunching my nose “What are you? A girl or a boy?” and then I pushed her. Uncle Jake laughed behind me and we became friends that day. Not me and Jessica but me and Jake.

I really enjoy attention, I feed of it, and I crave it. Sometimes I do things that I don’t quite get at all for attention, always for attention. At 4 years of age I discovered that when you find someone weaker than you, someone who will give you the right reaction you will get the right attention. Jake laughed as Jessica in her red checkered dress hit he ground and tears swelled in her eyes, I laughed too.

Jake and I became best friends; we became what only now I accept to call as bullies. We decided who was cool and who was not, we didn’t like freaks around us and we decide if you were a freak or not. See as much as I like attention I also fear it, I can’t be different because I’m afraid I will lose my close minded friends who don’t like change, or take different to well. So I do what is expected I dress with the cool cloths just like everyone else, I listen to the popular music, though its torture to hear. I fallow and let every one believe they are fallowing me I keep my status the attention and I’m “happy” with out anyone really seeing me.

The best way to stay on top of the pack is to keep others down, once again this is where the weak come into play, and I really hate myself sometimes. I’m glad, well the only upside to our situation is that you will never grow up to be like me, glad I can’t really say I’m glad I don’t think I will ever be glad.

-

I always felt a slight ache in my chest when ever I pushed Jessica in the school halls. When someone new came to school I’d allow them to become friends with your mom, then I’d drive them away, they would either become my friends or would be too afraid of me to be hers.

I was a light bulb feeding of attention, feeding off her pain and eventually I burned out. I found my self in the dark and lost with a feeling of emptiness that only she could feel.

I remember her before I completely destroyed her, before her hair became the multicolor mess it is now, I remember her before she looked at me with fear and hate, before she loved me. Her nice red hair a little like a carrot, big bright green eyes and white porcelain skin marked by a few blond freckles I still remember her like that sometimes, but the truth is I love her no matter what she looks like.

I teased her about the carrot hair till one day she came to school with black hair her green eyes shone like stars, her pale skin seemed to glow under their light. And what did I do? I walked right into her making her books drop, then me and Jake played soccer with her history book. When the teachers came by to stop us Jake whispered in her ear “You look dead with black hair, carrot cake”

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Susie always sat with us in the “popular” table, it was expected that we both would start dating eventually, not only from our classmates but from our parents too. She was the head cheerleader and I was captain of the football team, we would be prom king and queen, we would go to college she would get an A.A degree and I would study to be a lawyer, like my father decided the day I was born, then we would marry, we would buy a nice house close to town and we would have two perfect little kids.

Susie put up with a lot of my shit and gave me what I wanted with out much effort from my part. Why hold out? Our destinies had been decided long time ago. Sad part is that it wasn’t only me who received her affections. But everything was always forgiven; I would dump her date who ever held my attention for that week and then return to her with out us even batting an eye about it.

Time went by and nothing changed much. Jessica found a friend in six grade, your aunt Amanda, and Susie started a rumor about them being lesbians. We continued our high school carriers with out much to tell, we continued with pranks. Creating elbow Thursday, every third Thursday of the month it was the whole schools goal to elbow Jessica or Amanda as much as possible.

Jake enjoyed tripping them and throwing stuff at them. I always refrained myself from physically hurting them, but that didn’t keep me from laughing at them. Every year we would plan one big prank, on senior year we went a little overboard, but I really don’t want to talk about that now. It’s not like your going anywhere.

I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said that, I’m just trying not to let my tears escape.