Cross My Heart And Hope You Die

A Danny Dodger

Original

"Pump, Pump, Pump, Get it, Get it. That's the way girl, that's the way you go girl", I could hear them all the way in detention hall. Those god-forsaken cheerleaders, and there fucking chanting. Some one put a got damn bullet in my skull, I’ll pay you. Who in the hells idea was it to put stupid blondes in short skirts and give them a megaphone, I want to ring their neck. For fucks sake, let this be over soon.

Maybe I should tell you why I’m here in detention, again. See what had happened was I was minding my own business when my foot ‘accidentally’ stretched out and tripped the math teacher. It's not my fault he fell flat on his ass and got laughed at. Okay so ‘maybe’ I did it on purpose big deal, he'll live. His ass might be bruised from the fall but come on a month in D hall, I mean really. Stupid pricks, and their stupid D hall.

I opened my eyes staring at the feet of Mr. Hall, the D hall teacher. "Miss. Langley, would you mind explaining why your on my floor in fetal position", the big brut toward over me as I sat up. "I um, yeah long story short, I fell". He closed his eyes and sighed, "Another week of detention Miss. Langley". My lower lip trembled, "Oh god no, please anything but that, I can't go another week with their constant chanting, there driving me mad", I stood to my feet and now towered over him, he's short and fat, ha I laugh in his defeat. He looked up, "Are you hearing voices Miss. Langley". I coward down curling my body into a C, "No Mr. Hall". I got real close and whispered, "The cheerleaders". I burst into laughter and plopped down in my desk. He throw his hands in the air, "My god Miss. Langley, will you ever go five seconds with out a smart remark". I paused for exactly five seconds, "Just did, happy". He shook his head, "I give up really I do". My lips curled into a grin, "The first smart thing I’ve ever herd you say". He turned his back to me and went back to his desk, plopping down, "You may go". I stood up pulling my weightless bookbag with me, "Catch ya later dude". I clicked my tongue and walked out the door.

I think I was a little harsh on the poor guy…Naw he can cry me a river for all I fucking care. I’m sort of a heartless bitch, I care for me myself and I. If I had to choose between another, or me living I'd choose me with out any second thought.

I sat down in the wreak and let my head rest against the wheel, "I need therapy". Your probably wondering what the wreak is, well it’s my car, my wreak of a car. Proud to say I bought it all on my own with my own money that I stole from a gas station, hey it hard work. With the screaming and the pointing a gun, yup hard work. I started the engine and drove home, my home that my mum left for me when she died last year. Don't look so sad, her fault she went and dated that stupid mafia dude and got her self killed. As far as my dad, um I think his in Cali with his mistress, he doesn’t know mum’s dead yet. I figured I'd just leave him to his life so I could live mine. Yeah know.

Now I bet you want to know the point of me telling you my story, well this is the night that my whole life got turned upside down. Sounds cliché doesn’t it, just listen and you’ll get why it’s far from. You know what I changed my mind it is cliché, I'm going to stop babbling now and finish the story, well start it.

"Stupid fucking piece of shit', I was yelling at the Xbox again. I picked it up and jerked it toward me, pulling the cord out the wall and the T.V. "I'll teach you to make me lose", I tossed it out the window and listened for the crash. No crash, "What the hell". I stuck my head out the second story window, there was my Xbox sitting perfectly on the ground, cords wrapped up perfectly and everything.

Now here is wear the stupid girl in the movie goes out with a baseball bat and 'tries' to figure out what the hell is going on, not me. I shut the window and locked it. I ran down the stairs and locked all the doors then ran back up stairs to fetch my gun. Yes I had a gun, how else would I rob gas stations. I cheek the closets, under the bed, in the bathrooms, and in the cabinets, what it could happen. Finally sure it was all clear I let my guard down and dropped the gun to my side, "This is just weird".

3:00 a.m rolled around and my eyelids were falling. I was yawning and my head couldn’t stay up. I don’t remember falling asleep but I figure I did when I woke up to a loud crash in the kitchen. My whole body went on alert; my hand reached for the gun that was no longer there, "Fuck". I grabbed the nearest sharp object, a fire poker. "Okay you little fucker you messed with my head, I'm fucking scared shitless. Can you put my gun up and leave me alone". Laugh, something like bells chiming sounded in my ears. I whipped my body around and jabbed the poker out, nothing but air. I stopped, calmed my breathing and listened. I could hear it the slight pump of footsteps, but what was weird is they were above me, My head shot up and I looked straight into a abyss of blue eyes, they were glowing. I could see the eyes widen, this thing was shocked that I spotted it.

Let me let you in on a little secret, I'm what most people would call an assassin. I made this little deal with the devil kind of pact with a guy when I was younger. I was stupid and ignorant to the life I would lead latter on. I'll tell you the rest latter on.

Anyway, I now identified the creature as a vampire and dropped the poker. This next move is what I like to call Blonde Bitch. It has an 85 success rating. I dropped to the ground and balled my eyes out, "Oh god I’m going to die, Oh god save me please". I reached under the couch and grasped my spare stake. This stupid vampire bought it and went on the 'Oh you poor mortal child come with me' routine. I knew the routine well, vampire gets stupid girl to go off in the night with him, then sucks her dry after having his way with her. He asked me to look in his eyes, a common vampire trick. Lucky for me the latest technology produced a contact lens that can flog there mental attacks score one for the human race, Hell yes.

I looked up into the blue of his eyes, these contacts made me aware of what he was trying to make me do. 'Stand little one stand', I stood slowly hiding the stake behind me. 'Embrace the darkness, embrace me'. Seems weird for a vampire to what a hug but really it's not, see vampires have no body heat, and to touch a human is like having an orgasmic experience. I moved closer and readied my stake. I couldn't hold my smile any more; I always smile when I’m about to kill someone or something. His face turned to pure horror as I winked at him, "It was nice to meet you, buh bye now". I plunged the stake into his chest then blew him a kiss. With the air from my lips he blew away turning to ash and fluttering down on my once clean carpet. "Damn if you were still alive I’d make you clean this up".

Then my worst fear turned to reality, an ancient right there in my living room, how'd I know, well for once, the ash was reassembling back into a body, second I was now being held up by my throat. "How the hell did you do that", he was pissed. He continued with out me answering, "Do you know how bad that fucking hurts, and how the hell did you get past my mind". I opened my mouth buy I was out of air, "Can't… Breath". He dropped me and I clutched my throat in my hand. That was going to leave a mark, on my pride. "Do you know you’re the first person to live more then five seconds after doing that", he spoke softly, stupid vampire still thought I’d fall for his tricks. "Save the shit Dracula I'm not falling for it, I kill your kind for fun, yeah that’s right I don’t even get paid". I huffed and plopped down on the couch, now that I knew he was an ancient I had to think of a new plan. He sat down in the wing back chair across from me, propping his head on two fingers as his arm rested on the arm of the chair. I mimicked him, making fun of him and his transparent behavior. He let out a laugh, "you're a little spitfire aren’t you". I mocked him laughing, "Ha ha ha you're a little spitfire, shut the fuck up".

Moody things vampires are, one second they're laughing the next their teeth are on your neck. He flew across the table pinning me down; I couldn't help the laugh that escaped my lips, making him stop. "What the hell is your problem I'm going to kill you and you laugh".

My new plan was in action, bet you can’t guess what it’s called. It’s really funny here it is, 'laughing in the face of death'. Oh that's original isn't it? "Please don’t make me laugh, again. I could really care less what happens to me. Truthfully you’d be doing me a favor, so do it bite me". I stretched my neck out and set my jaw firm, "BITE ME FOR FUCKS SAKE PLEASE". His head dropped and settled between my breasts. He just lay there, doing nothing. I relaxed my neck cause it started to hurt, and poked him, "Excuse me".

Then I felt a slight pressure on my leg, "holy fuck get off me". Even through his jeans and mine I could feel him getting hard of my touch, my warmth. I gave a huge sideward push making him fall off the couch. Too bad for me he dragged me with him. I was now straddling him. He laughed, "I like this much better good idea". I pounded on his chest, "let me go you stupid fuck". He sat up keeping me in his lap, "I think I'm taking a liking to you". He pulled me up as he stood, "I'll see you tomorrow princess, by the way what's your name". With out thinking I said, "Adrienne"