Inspired by my weird mind...a boyI love...and a mass of chaotic stresses...

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Renegade Gods

The door opened. There it was again, the sudden nervous hush of half a thousand people, anxiously waiting to see their loved ones. Satzine gripped the hem of her dress tightly as she craned her neck to see. Dannel, the sunset guard, came through, and shook his helmeted head at them. A collective sigh of disappointment echoed in the great hall, and the conversations took up where they had left off. But not Satzine. She sat in half-terror, half-excitement, her willowy frame stiff in her seat, her hands curled around each other as she waited. Two years she hadn’t seen him. Those who knew them were glancing at her furtively. Indeed every time the guards checked in, some glanced first to her, smiling slightly to see her quickly freeze and swallow. It was amusing to them, but a never-ending time of fear for her. She didn’t know why she was so nervous. It was only Haverick. Only the warrior she had loved for years. She didn’t have any reason to fear his coming, yet she was a nervous wreck.

“Are you alright, Satzine? You look like you’ve been cornered by the Renegades themselves!” Her friend, Mellari, nudged her softly. “Relax…two years are finally gone.”

The door opened.

All conversation ceased immediately as everyone turned to the door once more. Except Satzine. That feeling was prickling her neck, and she didn’t have to turn. She could feel it. A scream broke out, someone’s scream of joy, and everyone surged to their feet, pandemonium erupting all over, filling the room with noise, chatter, cries and shouts of happiness. They had returned. The twenty warriors who had left two years ago to train themselves to battle the Renegade Gods, were back. Satzine got up, and ran the other way, to one of the pillars. She couldn’t breathe. She doubled over, gasping and trying to clear her head. This was ridiculous. Utter madness! It was just Haverick! People surged and crowded around her, pushing to get through to see their relatives, lovers and children. Finally she gripped the pillar with both arms, and forced herself to turn, and follow the flow of bodies. Bright silks flurried and waved, hats bobbed in the air, everything distracting her so she couldn’t see the warriors, just a flash of armor here and there, a sudden glimpse of flesh or an eye. Then people began to realize she was there, and without warning, they began to part the way for her. She stood still as the people thinned, hushing themselves as the line opened clearer and clearer, and suddenly…

There he was.

His back was to her as he greeted the guard who had let them in. Even from behind, he looked different. His hair was long and tied back now, and darker than she remembered. The regulation uniform they had left wearing had been dark blue and neat. What he was wearing now was war-torn, and black, his boots scuffed. She just stared at the back of his head, and it wasn’t until he noticed that suddenly it was much quieter, that he turned. All eyes were on them as he caught sight of her, his laughter dying on his lips, his expression suddenly darkening as he took a step towards her. She slowly approached him, wanting to convey her maturity- how much she had grown, how much two years had affected her. But once his head slightly tilted, and she saw the way his hands slightly spread towards her, she broke into a run, nearly knocking him over in her eagerness to touch him once again.

“Haverick!” she cried into his neck, and he held her tighter than she had ever been held, both his arms wrapped around her in a desperate attempt to make up for a very long two years.

“By the gods Satzine, I have missed you in my arms.” People grinned and pretended to look away, affected by the reunion. She nestled into his embrace and refused to relinquish her death grip- not that he tried. They held each other for a very long time, enough time that her arms began to ache from reaching up to him, and finally she let him go, her hands lingering on his arms, but even her hands he held onto, as if he couldn’t bear to be separated from her even that much. Then suddenly he did let go, only to take her face and kiss her suddenly, urgently, to the surprise of the crowd. Haverick had never been known to display that much affection in public, if ever. To do so in front of the entire town was surprising to say the least. When he finally let her go, she was hardly in the frame of mind to think intelligently, but she did step back to look at him better. His eyes were tired but filled with joy, and they seemed much more mature than they had before. He had obviously not shaved in a day or so, but he didn’t look very different from the last time she saw him, only fitter. Indeed, very much fitter! He looked her up and down, and then tugged on the back of her hair lightly, as he used to do.

“You got bigger kid!” he joked. Overcome, she smiled with teary eyes.

“Do you mean to say I am fatter?” One hand went around her waist as he pulled her close to his side, and stared into her eyes as if he would never stop.

“I’ve fought gods for the past two years, but I’d never brave your wrath if I did say that.” That brought on laughter, and finally the warriors were allowed to sit with their loved ones and eat. The entire town had prepared the best meal anyone of them had had for years, and the warriors were eager to eat it. Living on rations and specialized foods to ward off the gods, had left them with an appetite unlike any other. For the next few weeks anyway, they’d have to be careful not to undo their years of training and gorge themselves into obesity. Satzine awkwardly led Haverick to a table, and plates were given to them. In the time it took her to put her napkin on her lap, and arrange her cup, he had finished half of his meal. He paused at her horrified look, and chuckled.

“Sweetie…if you only knew how good this tasted.” Suddenly he noticed his cup was empty, and Satzine got up.

“Well, let me get you something to wash it down with then, piggy.” His laughter followed her to the counter. Old Carinne, the cook, handed her a jug of water, then nodded behind her.

“You better get on back there. Not even two minutes back, and Xaxi is making her moves on him.” Satzine spun around immediately. The whore!! The sultry, dark-skinned woman from nowhere was leaning beside him on the table, her plate in one hand, her hand on her curvaceous hip. Haverick always thought Satzine was mad, complaining about the “friendly girl”, but this was too much. Barely back, his lips still tasting of his loves, and she was trying to maneuver in! This would not do. Before, Satzine would have pouted, and waited for her to grow tired of his clueless politeness. But not now. Oh definitely not. Xaxi had barely slid her plate next to his, when a hand snapped it aside, sending it sliding down the table a foot and a half. Some people paused in their discussions, and looked over at them curiously. Even after this, Xaxi made the effort to gracefully come to a seat next to Haverick, but was suddenly shoved aside down the table as Satzine took back her place.

“Excuse me?” she demanded of the scowling Satzine. Haverick gave them a surprised look.

“Satzine, what are you-,”

“Love,” she interrupted, still glaring at Xaxi. “Do you really want to sit through this? Carinne has more food for you. Go get that, and I will finish up here.” He gave her an amused look, and took his plate away, to the fury of Xaxi. The blonde woman turned her hateful glare on the girl, eyes slit menacingly.

“You little slut! If your parents weren’t dead, I would-“

“How dare you!” Satzine hissed loudly enough for the entire table to hear. “In front of everyone, he has kissed me, proclaimed his love for me, and yet you think you can slide right in, and steal my Haverick? What kind of harlot do you take yourself for, and what kind of man do you think would want you?” Xaxi’s mouth fell open as every person within hearing distance began to chuckle at the brazenness of their little Satzine. That kiss seemed to have extra potency this time around!

“You! You-,”

“Done claiming your territory, sweetheart?” Haverick asked genially, his plate resting casually in the crook of his arm as he waited to get back to his seat.

“Almost. Back off, Xaxi. This is the one and only time I will tell you that, got it?” Xaxi looked up at Haverick, who simply tilted his head. Without a word, she got and left, leaving her plate sitting forlornly by itself.

“More for me,” was all Haverick had to say, leaning over Satzine and taking the opportunity to kiss her cheek as he snagged the lone plate. “I have missed you…”

“I know the feeling,” she whispered back, and kissed him again. It would have been another wonderfully inspiring kiss, had it not been for the sudden alarm that rang out along the hallways. Haverick pulled away, slapping the disc on his chest that powered up his armor.

“HAVERICK!” she called, but he gave her a fleeting apologetic look before following the commander to the outside.

“Figures those gods would start trouble on this night!” snapped a tired woman, watching her son run off. “The only night we celebrate anything!” Suddenly Satzine jerked upright.

“The children!” It was Xaxi’s duty tonight to guard the young ones, but if she was here, then who had she gotten to replace her? Unless she hadn’t. Oh gods! She tore from the table, barely able to flash the almost invisible Haverick a last glance before she headed down the opposite hallways to the outside, the night hitting her like a cold slap on the face. It shouldn’t be this cold, not at this time of year. They were out and about, the Renegade gods. But why tonight? Why out front, where the warriors were all heading to? They had done nothing to offend anyone tonight!

“Satzine?” A blond boy, merely six, opened the far away door to the nursery, blearily searching for her. Xaxi didn’t like him, mainly because there was speculation that the foundling might actually be hers that she had dumped somewhere. But Satzine took a shining to him, and so he was her favorite of the entire group of children. He had no parents, but he treated her like a mother, and she had no problem with that.

“Jaxon! Close the door, I’ll be there in a second!” she shouted. The warning lights in the yard as she crossed, turned red. Never a good sign. She stopped, hoping against hope-staring hard at the lights-willing them to go back to green. Tense seconds went by. Go back! Go back to green! Nearly giving her the worst heart attack ever, alarms went off, and the temperature dropped dramatically. She broke into a run, sweating in terror, hope completely gone. They were here! Only the warriors were fully equipped to fend the renegade gods off completely, but every citizen had at least one defense, and as one of the Nurturers, she had at least three. Jaxon looked worriedly at her, holding the door open for her.

“Close it Jaxon!” she shouted, running hard. “Close it!” He hesitated, she could see his fear, and his unwillingness to shut her out with all the gods, but she’d rather protect the building, than have to try and protect a room of children against very close gods. Each building was secure unless you let them in. “Please Jaxon close it!!” He shook his head, holding onto the knob for dear life.

“No! They will hurt you!” She was halfway there. Who had built the nursery so far from the main room? She’d remember to complain, now that she had a reason! Hissing began to flow around her as she neared the compound, and something cold licked at her legs, surprising a shriek out of her.

“By Vista back to where you came!” she shouted as she stumbled. There was a snapping sound, and a red glow from her left, then the hisses got louder. Usually invoking the name of one of the lawfully aligned gods made them retreat for fear one would come, but that rarely happened. This time they must not fear the name too much. Wonderful.

“Defense!” she shouted, calling for help. “Protect the youth!” Jaxon was crying now, and when she looked up, she saw why. Faint shapes were forming from the darkness, purple in the red glow of the warning lights. “DEFENSE!” she shouted again, hoping her voice would carry over the alarms and the shouting people always did in a situation like this. The rocks were painful under her hands, and she slowly got up, dancing away as the shapes began trying to touch her. “In the name of Vista! Gailgat! Uthros and Wehali! In the name of KURAQAI!”

Twisted screams rang out around the clearing, and in their pain, they gave off their brief outlines, enough for her to see a clear path to run to the nursery. Jaxon was still trembling by the door, his eyes locked on the shrieking, twisted forms of the renegades. Getting to her feet, one leg still numb from their icy touch, she ran as best she could to his side, just in time for Haverick to come out the door she had come from. His eyes flickered over the shapes, and the leg she favored, and waved an arm at her.

“Satzine! Get in there and close the door!”

“No, really?” she yelled back, and pushed Jaxon inside. Her lover drew his weapon, the double-bladed sword as the shapes stopped flickering, and went back into invisibility in their recovery. He glanced over at her, his face suddenly unrecognizably hard.

“Shut the door.” Now she knew how Jaxon had felt. How could she shut him out of the safety of the building, with all those killers? What if he needed help? For a second she hesitated, but when he noticed it, he gave her another look, a softer one, and smiled slightly in a way that made her heart beat twice as hard. “Sweetheart…shut the door.” Unwillingly, she pushed her weight on it, and let it click shut. Inside, the warning light blinked to green. All was safe inside. But outside? Jaxon hugged her leg, his child-like way of comfort, and looked up at her, and started crying.

“What’s the matter Jaxon?” She fell to her knees beside him, and he buried his face in her long brown hair sobbing.

“I didn’t do what you said! You said shut the door, and I didn’t do it!” Poor little boy. She soothed him and stroked his head, trying to not wake the other children who were, surprisingly enough, still asleep. How they could sleep through everything was a mystery to her.

“It’s okay Jaxon, I know you were scared, and you didn’t want to leave me out there alone. Next time, do what I say, okay? I won’t get hurt, I promise!” He rubbed his face deeper into her hair, and she made a small face, thinking of the mucus she might find there later. Oh well. All for love. “Little man…when did Xaxi leave you alone? Do you know? Were you awake?” He pulled away, rubbing his nose with the back of his hand.

“It was a long time ago. I thought she went to get food from the party, but she never came back. That’s why I started to go looking for you.” She pointed at the clock.

“Was it six?” At his blank look, she sighed. They’d need to start working on the time thing. “Was the short stubby line on the six? Or was it on a bigger number?” He scrunched up his face.

“She was gone a long time, and when I looked up, it was on the six.” Satzine clenched her jaw. She had left almost immediately after Satzine herself! What a-a-! She clenched her fists. “You were here all by yourself? Were all the children asleep?”

“After you left, Xaxi said we had to go to bed.” Incredible. Simply incredible! There were no depths for this woman!

“Jaxon, when it is Lia’s turn to watch over you, you tell her everything, okay? I want them to hear you tell them, okay?”

“Okay Satzine.” He hugged her again, then looked up quickly. “Who was that outside?”

“That was Haverick, don’t you remember him? You were only four when he left, though, still in the Toddler-room. You may not be able to go back that far…”

“I don’t remember. He looks really strong.” At that, she smiled in the darkness so he couldn’t see.

“Yes….he is…” Suddenly the entire building shook as if it got hit with a bomb. Children suddenly screamed as they were forced out of their innocent sleep by fear.

“Children! It is okay! I am here! Satzine!” Jaxon was hugging her leg so tightly, it almost made her trip as she rushed to the center of the room where all the small ones were converging.

“Satzine!”

“What’s happening?”

“I’m scared!”

“Momma! Help!”

“Children!” she raised her voice sharply, and they stopped yelling, even though tears still ran down their cheeks. “Be still. Away from the walls. The Renegade gods are trying to start trouble, but we have warriors outside fighting them as we speak. So come to me, sit, and we will wait for them to go away.” She knelt down, immediately covered by six or seven warm bodies trying to get as close as possible. Jaxon stayed attached to her leg, his eyes shut tight. Another slam to the building, and a few shrieked, and crawled closer.

“Satzine!” Haverick! Quickly she hopped over bodies and got to the door. “Haverick! I’m here!”

“I need you outside!”

“I can’t leave! The children are by themselves!” He cursed violently, and another resounding hit to the building made it groan and shake.

“Satzine!” a little girl cried, holding her knees.

“Where the bloody hell is Xaxi!” he yelled.

“One guess!” she snapped, still angry. “These kids have been alone for hours!”

“I need your zaihou!” She looked down at the holy pendant, one each Nurturer wore, from the lawfully aligned gods themselves, once they had helped them in the great wars between the two factions of gods. It gave each wearer the ability to call on the lawfully aligned. Everyone only had one, but if you combined the powers of the zaihou, it doubled in power. Quickly she ripped it off, and flung the door open, tossing it to his back.

“Here!” Smoothly, he snatched it out of the air, and winked.

“Get inside!”

“What thanks!” she snorted, but shut the door quickly lest they try to come inside. There had been hundreds! Of the quick scan she did, she had seen swarms of them, all over the place! At least they were the lesser Renegades, not the elder ones. The Elders had real hatred, not just mischievousness as these seemed to have tonight. The Elders had the true bodies, and would speak as intelligent beings to you right before they tried to eat your heart. They believed hearts had souls, the only true immortality- and longed to be like their former selves, the lawfully aligned. The lawfully aligned did not need souls to be immortal, since they followed the rules of the universe, but the renegades had rebelled, and twist the laws of nature to themselves, but in doing so, they forfeited their right to immortal living. Now they sought it back, through the clusters of humanity that made their existence on this rock of earth. Once the lawfully aligned had seen that the beings obeyed the laws of nature themselves, they had given their aid. Only rarely, since then, had the lawfully aligned intervened directly. Once, Satzine had called on Gailgat, the god of strength, and it had been something she never forgot. In fact…

“Children! Listen! I will tell you what happened when I summoned Gailgat, god of strength!” This got their attention, as she knew it would. Not fully, but their tears were less intense. “Not many of you will remember the day the avalanche destroyed the Gathering Hall-,”

“We don’t have a gathering hall,” complained someone.

“Because it got avalanched, stupid!”

“Hey now!” she snapped. “Name calling is-,”

SLAM! This time dirt actually fell from the ceiling, from who knows where. The children burst into tears again.

“Alright! The avalanche started when the workers accidentally set off the mining bombs too close to the base of the mountain. The only reason I called on Gailgat, was because the mouth of the mine had trapped many of your mommy’s and daddy’s down there, and they wanted to get out, and come back home.”

“What did he look like, Satzine?” whispered Aleisha, a tiny wisp of a girl no older than Jaxon. She lifted her eyes to the ceiling, where the green lights glowed and filled her with a sense of safety.

“He was huge, Aleisha…bigger than this house. But remember, they can take any shape they choose. He chose to be a giant dragon, with a long body he used to slide inside the mine, and create a hole they could come through. Each person who was wounded, he healed as they crawled through him. He went as thin as air, and breathed onto them gently, glowing like the stars in the sky…And his eyes….held all the kindness of the world…” Each one was silent, imagining this, and it wasn’t until a mighty shake of the building, this time accompanied with the groaning of metal being pushed to its limits, did she notice that the light was now red. Carefully, so as not to draw attention to it even though her heart was beating frantically in her chest, she instructed everyone to lie down and close their eyes.

“Try to sleep my children.” She said softly, flicking her eyes everywhere to guard for the tell-tale shapes of the Renegades. Red didn’t mean they were inside, it just meant they had the opening to be inside. Something must have broken to let them in. Even worse, she realized with a terrible sinking feeling, as her hand drifted to the now-missing weight around her neck….

She didn’t have her zaihou. She got up slowly, and reached for the door with one hand, when a shimmering light betrayed the worst. One was inside. At least one. Instinctively she backed up, nearly stepping on someone’s hand. The girl lifted her head in surprise.

“Satzine?”

“Close your eyes,” she snapped in a tone of voice that left no room for argument. The girl obeyed, kudos for her. “Nobody open your eyes!”

“Satzine!” Jaxon said in a trembling voice. “I’m scared!” The shape took a step towards her.

“In the name of every lawfully aligned god, don’t you dare take another step.” She hissed, even though without her zaihou she had no power to summon anything. It must have known, because it hissed in amusement, the tone clear behind its breathy voice. Jaxon at least, heard this, and he began to cry harder, the other children crying too at the sound.

“I’m scared Satzine!”

) Don’t be... (

The light went green. A long silvery tail suddenly whipped through the space with the evil hissing, and the blue light-show, and for an instant, the entire body was illuminated with light- a skeletal, frightening thing with long, freakishly deformed bones that jutted everywhere. Talons the length of her arm flailed pitifully before a hawkish scream drew nails down her spine. The children screamed too, and she fell to her knees to comfort them, just as Haverick burst inside, the double-blade glowing like a bright underwater lamp. She turned to him with wide eyes, and he spared a glance to her, relieved to se she was safe, as the lawful god passed him to leave. It had four feet, like a dog, but a tail of a snake, and the muzzle, when it turned to give her a farewell stare, was like a tiger. All over, its fur glistened with dew, and she barely had the presence of mind to shake the children.

“In the name of the goddess of speed, Wihali…” They stared with wide eyes, and the goddess bowed her head once to Haverick before she exited.

“Thank you, Wihali,” he murmured. “I do owe you.” Had he summoned her? She paused and looked back at them all. Outside, the screams of the Renegades were deafening as the warriors overcame them, and even though her voice was breathy and light, they could all hear her perfectly.

) The youth…so deserving of life…Love…so essential to life. You owe me nothing, warrior. This night has benefited us greatly. However…there will be so many more like this. Watch for me tomorrow. Things must be done. (

And she stepped outside, into nothingness. Haverick went to Satzine, kneeling and placing her xaihou around her neck carefully. Once that was done, he crushed her in a hug, and a kiss that, despite being terrified, made the children wrinkle their noses in disgust.

“I am so sorry. It was my fault, taking the zaihou. We needed one more to contain them.”

“It is not your fault,” she whispered. “I was needed here. Xaxi should have been here in my place.”

“True enough. I’ll speak to the commanders. That’s inexcusable!” His eyes darkened, then he saw the eyes of the children, and cleared his throat, realizing how frightening this must have all been. “Crazy night, children?” They simply stared. Aleisha’s eyes lit up.

“Lia!” Everyone began chiming in as the Nurturer carefully stepped into the nursery, her eyes wide at the damage.

“By the gods, Haverick! It looks as if the nursery was a can in kick-the-can!”

“Yes, they tried to get in very badly. I just don’t know why. They were trying to get in the Main hall for a moment, then suddenly they shifted back here. Finally, when I saw the warning lights hit the building, I summoned Wihali, just in time apparently. They were going after the children.” Lia held the children tightly, then looked up.

“Where is Xaxi?” Satzine remained pointedly silent, and glanced down at Jaxon, reattached to her leg. He took one look, then piped up in a loud voice.

“She left us! She left right after she told us all to go to bed, and then she went to the party!” Lia’s eyes darkened. One thing Satzine knew….you never messed with another woman’s children. Three of the endangered children were Lia’s own, and by the look in her eyes, she was going to bring this up very loudly at the next town meeting. Excellent. She couldn’t help but smile.

“This area is safe.” Haverick said tiredly. “We never expected them to attack so soon after we came back, but at least we are all trained to react.”

“You need to sleep,” Satzine murmured, and got to her feet. “Lia, I am going to take this man and put him in bed. I will be back.”

“Don’t bother,” Lia said tightly. “You have done your duty for tonight. Any god tries to get past me tonight, and he will regret the day he was born.” Satzine kissed Jaxon goodnight.

“Sleep little man,” she said with a smile, and stepped outside.

And gasped.

It was as Lia said-the outside of the building was completely destroyed- no wonder they had gotten inside. It would need to be rebuilt entirely. Suddenly seeing how fragile it had been inside, she had to steady herself for a moment.

“They can’t stay in there,” she murmured. “It’s not safe.”

“I’ll have Dannel move them. For now…I need to sleep. Using seventeen zaihou's can really drain you…” He hadn’t been to his house in two years, neither had she, really. She had simply had the cleaning crew keep it clean and fresh, so when she unlocked it for him, it looked like he had just left it.

“Wow,” he said softly, touching his tabletop. “You kept it up to date.”

“The cleaning crew did…” she said shyly, turning on a lamp. “I tried, at first, but…I just couldn’t keep…” he cupped her face with his hand, and smiled down into her face.

“I have missed you so much.” He said simply. She laid her forehead on his shoulder, and sighed.

“I couldn’t come in here everyday, not if you weren’t in it…Like I lived here without your permission.”

“What if you did live here with my permission?” Her eyes flew open. They had never said anything about that before. He felt her start to pull away, and he wrapped his arms around her. “I’m sorry. We are tired, I know this really isn’t the time. It has been the longest time without you. Much more than two years.” She stood up and kissed him, her arms around his neck as he held her tightly against him. She had missed this-him, more than anything. Why not live there? Why not….get married? When she let him go, he held her face for a long time, then willfully pulled away and stepped back.

“It’s the hardest thing to let you go,” he laughed simply, and started removing the bulky armor and sword. “The Lawful usually, if ever, meet at dawn with the commander. If you want to see Wihali again, I’m sure no one will mind.”

“Do you warriors always summon them that way?”

“We had to, usually, when the Renegade Elders showed themselves. They are the hardest, Satzine…they take the forms of everyone, anyone they want…friends…children…people you love even…and can hold it, unlike the lesser renegades” he trailed off and sighed the sword to the ground, his movements with his breath. “Once…I had to kill a Renegade elder who looked just like you.” She wanted to go to him, but knew if she did, then she wouldn’t let go, so she remained by the door, arms folded as he finally stripped himself of all the protective gear. He yawned. “Needless to say, it was hard.”

“I’m sorry moose-head,” she whispered, his old nickname. He smiled briefly.

“Go to bed sweetheart. I am back, and I’m not going anywhere soon.”

“Gods willing,” she said sarcastically.

“No.” he said firmly, turning to her with cold eyes. “I’m not going again.” Then he softened. “Goodnight love.” The words came so easily off his lips. But they choked her. So she nodded to him, and turned, pausing and fighting herself at the door, then finally opened it, and headed back to her own house. It seemed empty and silent, but the lights were all green, and that’s all she cared about…..for tonight. Tomorrow…would be something else entirely…