Author: The Melissa Occult PM
Search for all of the answers.Rated: Fiction M - English - Romance/Spiritual - Chapters: 10 - Words: 5,128 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 08-15-06 - Published: 05-13-06 - id: 2173257
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
A/N: Sorry if this seems a bit repetitive, it is actually a rewrite of a seperate story. (Just so I didn't break the rules or w/e the older story is no longer on here.)
"My world fell apart." She told me as a matter-of-fact.
"I'm looking for the meaning in mine." I told her in reply.
"Have you found it?" She asked me, sincerely too.
"I don't know, I couldn't really tell you yet. I think it has something to do with love. Love of some sort or another, good love or bad love, seems to be the cause of everything."
"Is the meaning of life to love?"
I didn't answer her and we sat there in silence. Snow fell out of the night sky and pooled into little tufts, creating an endless snowy sea down the streetway. The waves of snow crashing on the ground whispered as they pushed forward to pull the heat back out into the darkness. Perfect crystalline structures, rigid and sharp, all interlock into a blanket worthy to screw in. We did no such thing.
"Have you ever been to the ocean?" I asked her.
"No, but I've always wanted to." she told me as we watched the snow melt on her brown shoes.
A million miles away, on the other side of the world, the sun was streaming out over the ocean. The earth's rotation had brought it above all the glitter and gold of coral reefs. I wondered... does the world move so fast that we don't feel it, or does it move too slowly? Perhaps we're like gyroscopes: if you put a person on a constant plain, would his brains and insides keep spinning until everything was squeezed out? I also wondered which the world would prefer if it were given the choice: Eternal night or eternal day? I asked her about this and she smiled a little.
"I think that it would choose to stay forever in the night." she said to me, with light brown hair moving gently in the frigid night air. She wore a red woolen scarf, but no hat, and her cheeks were rosy from the cold. If roses grew in January I would have liked to have given her one.
"The earth would choose to be forever in the dark, so that everything living would die. Like a festering wound that is finally sterilized." She asked me what I thought about it.
"It would choose darkness, as a final act to unite people in perfect pairs of two. There's nothing better in the eternal cold than an eternal hug to keep you warm."
"I'm cold." she whispered as she looked at me. Her breath made tiny snowflakes in the night air. I wondered if she smoked, but it didn't really matter much now, we both did. I almost smiled as I watched water freeze in the space between us. I reached out across the distance that so often separates people from each other and I hugged her.
"I'm cold too."
She hugged me back and we sat together like that for the longest time.
"I thought you only liked women..." I whispered to her.
She didn't answer me at first, but then she replied: "I liked women because they always seemed so gentle... My father kind of ruined men for me... I like you though; you seem nicer than anyone I've ever met..."
"Even if I am a boring person?"
She smiled, "I'd rather love a kind a boring person, than a violent one... It's not that I'm a lesbian in the strictest sense of the word, I just become enamored to people's personalities, and not their bodies..."
"Do you think it's better that way?" I hoped the snow never stopped falling, that the sun never came back up, that the world would be lost to darkness forever. Perhaps I was falling in love on my journey to discover what love is. Is there really any other way to do it?
"I don't know if it's better or not... no one ever returned my love..."
"That's sad..." I was running out of things to say, my mind was empty of everything except the warmth that she was and the frost webbing up the side of the telephone booth.
"Oh..." Was all she said, she was running out of words too.
And suddenly words didn't matter anymore. She drifted off to sleep in my arms. I dozed with the sweet smell of her hair and floral shampoo... her scarf was scratchy, but it comforted me more than anything. I never knew I had so much in me that I didn't understand... I never knew that love could mean so much, and be such a simple thing.
Through a broken window in a broken apartment, which was probably owned by broken people, soft jazz tunes fell down with the snowflakes. It was like all the roses in heaven and all the cherry blossoms in Japan swirled around our solitary tranquility.
Quietly we dreamt of far off places and the seas of the moon, our souls lost to the depths of an endless ocean of stars and snowflakes.