Never Had A Chance

Chapter 15

Tuesday morning I stopped in at work then we headed for Parson. Connie was the next item on my list. Micah had assured me that I didn’t have to worry about Ryan, he had been quite understanding when Mike had explained things, but we both knew that Connie was a different matter altogether.

We stopped at Mike’s parents and retrieved my car, which Donnie had so sweetly taken care of in our absence. We had dinner plans with them. I was nervous already. Mike went to check on the livestock and I drove over to Connie’s. When I arrived she was out back in the garden pulling weeds.

“Hello!” I called. She looked up and then immediately back down. I took a few more steps in her direction. “You don’t have to talk to me.” My voice was shaking. “But I really hope you’ll listen to what I need to say.”

She made no response.

“I love Micah.”

Still no response.

“I was wrong not to tell you what was going on, but I promise you that I never befriended you or anyone else to get to him. I liked doing things with you, having a girlfriend. I’m not going to throw a pity party. I know I’ve been stuck on myself and I hope it’s not too late.”

Connie sat in the dirt. “I shouldn’t have gone off on you like I did, before I knew what was going on.”

“We got married.”

She nodded. “Ryan told me.”

I sat down beside her. Words kept tumbling out. “I'm so confused. I keep screwing up and hurting people I care about. I never thought anything like this would happen. One minute I'm having fun and the next we're married and I didn't know what to do. It's a lame excuse. I don’t know why I couldn’t just be honest. I guess I thought that I wasn't good enough for him. That once people found out and that they'd wake me up from my dream and he'd be gone. I didn't trust him, didn't trust anyone. It's so stupid." I buried my head in my hands. "I don’t know what’s going on anymore.”

She laughed ruefully. “You sound like how I feel. My insides are all twisted up in a jumble. One minute I’m fine and happy and the next I’m out for blood.”

“Maybe your pregnant.” I joked. “That’s what everyone keeps thinking is wrong with me. I’m not, but that doesn’t stop…”

“Oh my God, Maureen.” Her eyes flew open wide and I could see her shaking. “My God! Maybe I am?”

-0-

We survived dinner with his parents and although they were quite surprised by our announcement I think they were also a little pleased. Lucy cried and ran from the room. When she returned she had a quilt with her that she handed to me. Apparently Mike’s great grandmother had pieced one for each of her grandchildren before she passed away. She had asked that they be given to the bride on their wedding day. It was my turn.

-0-

“Micah?” I stepped into the barn. He wasn’t expecting me. It was Saturday morning, I had returned to my apartment for the week and we planned for him to come down Saturday morning after he milked. But I couldn’t wait that long. I left early, but I must have missed the milking. Things were already in the cleanup stage. The barn was quiet. Shadows and squares of gold lay across the floor as the early morning sunlight lifted the blanket of darkness that the retreating night had left behind. I saw him at the far end of the building and watched as he approached.

“Maureen?”

“What? No Maury? No kiss hello?” It sounded strange to her my full name from him.

“Well yeah!” He held my shoulders and pressed his soft lips to mine. I held him tight.

“Maury?” He questioned. “Is everything alright? What are you doing here at this time of day? Don’t hold me too tight there’s no telling what I have on my clothes.”

“Micah.” I stopped him. “I don’t care.” I could tell that he was curious but confused, too. “I got a phone call last night.”

“From Matthew?” His eyes widened and he reached out to comfort me.

“No.” I said as I lay my head against his shoulder. “It was Kate.”

“Kate? She went to school with you?”

“Uh huh.” I nodded. That five minute and thirty-seven second conversation had made a lot of things much clearer to me. I touched his cheek and felt stubble rough against my fingers. I wanted to see his face, to look in his eyes. “She asked me how I was doing and I told her the truth.”

He smiled. I love how when he smiled his whole face lights up. “You told her what they did to you?”

I shook my head. “That doesn’t matter anymore.” I felt so good! Liberated! “It hurts sometimes, but it doesn’t have to control me or… I mean, Mike. I told her that I was fighting a lot of hurt and depression for a while, but that I am happy. I’m doing better than I ever have before.” I couldn’t read his face but I stared earnestly at him. “I told her how wonderful you are and how I love being with you and how I love being your wife.”

He gathered me into his arms. “When are you going to live with me like a wife?”

“Two weeks.” I told him. “I put in my notice at work.” He kissed me. “Actually,” I kept talking. “There’s a group home about thirty-five minutes from here, they want to know if I’ll transfer there 3 days a week.

“That’s good.” He was nibbling on my ear.

“The rest of the time I’ll help you.”

He smiled at that. “You’re gonna help me farm?”

“Yup.” I looped my arms around his neck and smiled up at him. “I’m gonna be a dang ole cowgirl. Dang ole drive a tractor and dang ole make love to you in the hay!”

He buried his laugh in my hair. “Thank you.” He pushed the hair back and kissed me before he whispered again. "Thank you."

I wrinkled my nose. “You do stink.”

He scooped me up. “Let’s go inside.” We had so much to talk about, so much to discuss and so much love to make.

-0-

I can’t believe that it's only been just over a year since I went to that first softball game. The rumors about Micah and I have slowed down. Let people think what they will, I really don’t mind. I’ve learned that it doesn’t matter.

The sun is warm this evening. Mike is gorgeous out there on the field. I watched him as he threw the ball to first. It’s one fluid motion. He must have felt my eyes on him because he turned to smile at me. He’s been worried about me lately, but I’ve honestly never been better.

My book was shipped to the publisher last week. Yes. I wrote my novel. I know it sounds incredibly corny, but it’s about a girl who was alone and scared. Too scared to do anything about it, until this guy comes along and changes everything. Micah loves it.

I caught myself touching my stomach. I’ve been doing that a lot lately. He’s going to be a good daddy.

I think I’ll tell him tonight.

The End.

Author’s Notes:

Well that was the last chapter.

What did you think? Did things end the way you expected? (kind of corny huh?)

I had trouble with the tenses in this chapter. I hope that it read smoothly.

I thank all of you for reading and reviewing.

Another plug for my other story The Fortune Teller's Child. I'm up to chapter 15 on it with less than 10 chapters to go! Check it out!

Kree