To my wonderful, darling, mother dearest,
You are the best and you are my nearest.
But please listen a second to what I have to say,
Before you take me out shopping today.

Red, Orange and Purple spotty socks,
Are just about as cool as bright yellow frocks.
And beware of evil stripy tops,
They make you look, on the run from the cops.

When food shopping, please beware of the meat!
Do you really think slaughter is the best thing to eat?
And stay from the sugar, the chocolate and chips,
What goes in my mouth goes straight to my hips.

Chatting with every single person you see,
It's fun for you but it's boring for me.
And no popping into work, just to say "Hi"
It'll be 30 minutes, before you say "Bye!"

Be careful around the cool kids from school,
Shopping with mother just isn't cool.
If they saw me and you, they'll just taunt and tease,
In fact I would rather been seen with dead fleas.

Thinking about it, all in all,
Couldn't you just stay away from the mall?