On Your Sleeve

The cup runneth over in front of me.
Poured out heart too quickly.
He, and the overfilled glass surround me fast.
I’m afraid, so afraid to look at him directly.
His face pulled closer, now,
I cry. (and I cry, and I cry…)
I feel sickly.
Is it asking too much to want you to call me, lover can we go out in a blaze of burning glory?

Tongue in my eyes, he throws his head back, laughs,
“You’re in control, believe.”
He soaks up my pain with an arm, looks at me,
mutely can’t ask him to not wear my heart on his sleeve.
His legs wrapped around me,
I cry. (and I cry, and I cry…)
I can’t leave.
Is it asking too much to want you to call me, lover can we go out?

I wish it wasn’t three AM,
I wish you weren’t asleep.
I wish I wasn’t next to you
wishing that you’d keep
me wanting all that you won’t give me.
Love.
And love, forgive me,
but I’ve fallen in too deep.

And tighter, the squeeze of acknowledgement.
A long pause of self doubt.
Bloodied shirt of my own honesty gags me.
Can I retrieve those words, put them back into my mouth?
”Relax, relax.” He soothes.
I cry. (and I cry, and I cry...)
It’s called growth.
Is it asking too much to want you to call me lover?

So, do what I want. He doesn’t mind much.
He’ll provide a service.
Hot breath in my ear, I’m wondering the cost.
His whisper voice insists to me that I deserve this.
I can’t move, he holds me.
I cry. (and I cry, and I cry…)
I’m worthless.
Is it asking too much to want you to call?

I wish it wasn’t three AM,
I wish you weren’t asleep.
I wish I wasn’t next to you
wishing that you’d keep
me wanting all that you won’t give me.
Love.
And love, forgive me,
but I’ve fallen in too deep.

I didn’t wait long enough to think this through.
Your reaction speaks true.
I am feeling you using this against me.
Taking advantage of my emotions, heart pale blue.
Why don’t I want to leave?
I cry. (and I cry, and I cry…)
I love you.
Is it asking too much to want you?

Words spoken too fast, the cup runs over.
No blood on the table,
but I’m still bleeding my heart into your sleeve.
Holding me back, holding me with you like a staple.
I’d stop crying on you…
I try. (and I try, but I’m…)
Unable.
Is it asking too much?

I wish that I could turn around.
I wish that I could still believe.
I wish I wasn’t asking much.
I wish for some reprieve
from all this aching while you’re with me,
love,
and love forgive me,
that’s my heart upon your sleeve.