It would have been so much easier if he had only died, because then he would not have to deal with the hardship of knowing he had survived and his buddy hadn't. Both had known that when they signed up that they possibly may not come back, but neither really thought about that end of it. Now he was sitting in a veterans hospital with only one arm, but no friend.

"Lieutenant, you have some mail." a nurse said with fake cheer, as she handed him a couple envelopes.

"Thanks." he replied stiffly as he took them from her. He looked at them, one was from his girlfriend in the little town of Kansas, Oklhoma, the other from Jud, his buddy. This was the letter he should have been suspecting. The letter had been written two days before they had left for Nam.

Flashback

"Hey, Mick, I was thinkin'. Ya know how's there the chance we may not make it?" Jud Peletrow said as they were working on the fence that marked the mid point between Mick's property and Old Man Robins'.

"Yeah, I guess. Why what's on yer mind?" Mick asked, tipping his old brown cowboy hat up and bringing an arm across his forehead in order to wipe the sweat away.

"I was thinkin' maybe, we cain write final letters to each other. Ya know, kinda write our will in 'em. I don't know. It was jest an idy. Probably stupid I'm shore." Jud said not looking up from the barb wire he was putting in. That was Jud, not very confident of himself, unless he was in a fight. Before he and Mick had become best buds he had kept to himself, it didn't help that he was a slow learner. He would always get picked on for that, he also was scrawny and didn't look like much, but he could hold his end in a fight.

"Ya kiddin' me, it's not stupid. It's a good idy. We'll tell someone to mail it out if we die. Fer example let's say I go belly up, I'll have Jenny or Pa send it to ya. That's a good one, man." Mick said, giving Jud a friendly pat on the back.

Present

Now he was looking at the letter. Jud still hadn't quite got the concepts of spelling down, but after reading so much of his stuff he had an idea of how to make heads or tails out of it. The letter said..

Dear Mick,

In two daze we ship out. I no you probubly alredy rote yours but here is mine. Anythin I hav is yours. Being that I got no parents or nothin. Thanks for bein my bud when no one wood. Since you are reedin this that means I went first so don't worry, I'm in a better place now. Dang, promised my self I woodn't cry, but gess I am. I hate this, we're goin' off to Nam and we don't no if we'll make it. Gosh, I hope you doo Mick. You have promise. See ya when ya die, hope it's not too soon after me.

Jud

Just reading the letter made Mick all choked up. He laid it down on the table beside him, got out of his chair and lied down on the bed he was near. He didn't bother opening Jenny's letter, it just didn't feel right. He'd open it later.