The love that he felt for her was all consuming, the most potent emotion that anyone would come across. Yet, he hadn’t even seen it coming. It wasn’t like a lightning bolt from heaven that hit him suddenly… no. It crept up, silently. Like a lamb. But that didn’t make the impact any less.

Their love took a hold of him, restricted his lungs and throat. She was everywhere. He was drowning in her, and he liked it. It was like a drug to him. Every glimpse of her was another hit.

But they were never meant to fall in love. It didn’t make logical sense. They just didn’t fit. Like pieces from the opposite side of the jigsaw, like two parallel lines. Never meeting.

So wrong.

But so right.

An ordinary day, when they hit each other. She was going to work; he was going to band practice. She was in a suit. He was in ripped jeans and a Slayer shirt. Both going in their opposite ways, when he looked down. If only for a spilt second. Green met brown and the lines collided.

She was his best friend, he was hers. Never one name heard without the other from that moment on.

JesseSamuels.

KarmaDavis.

And the world made sense.

The world tilted on its axis as his tongue met the salt of skin. Eyes rolled back as her unique taste of earth and warm water filled his senses. The inferno in his heart was re-ignited in that moment, almost 3 years on from when the first spark it the fuse.

But it wasn’t love.

It was lust, passion, and the inferno taking its destructive course. Burning their every fibre into ash. He never knew despair until he kissed her, and she never knew suicide until she kissed him back, but damnation was divine. They loved the feeling of falling. And together they fell.

.xxx.

“We can’t carry on you know…” He voice full of determination, he thought he almost most heard sadness in there too. But he knew it was just his hopeful imagination at work again. Playing cruel tricks on him.

He stared down at her beautiful green eyes and brushed a loose strand of her long chocolate hair away from her face.

“I won’t change what you want. We’ve been down this road before.” He meant it. He knew this wasn’t the end of the, Nothing could end what they had. Whatever it was.

“I know.” Her voice sounded hollow, and it scared him to hear it like that. Like she had trained it to be that. He swallowed the painful lump in his throat and spoke again.

“So come inside…” Just once, once, his steady voice cracked. His stoic front had faded and the thought of that killed him.

She shook her head and his heart broke.

“Goodbye.” The one word he never thought she’d ever say came flying from her perfect lips and his whole world fell down around him. But it wasn’t love.

.xxx.

2 more years, and the lines became parallel again. The jigsaw made sense, the pieces back in their rightful places. She was working, out in the world of business while he was in basements with his band.

Until he saw her from across a crowded dance floor. The fire inside re-lit and he kissed her again. Wanting to savour every moment he could grab onto to. Her kiss was as salty as his dim memories always whispered, still tasted like earth and warm water. But there were three years of difference in that patch of kiss, a tiny scar that had been unseen by him. And the lines crashed and burned together. But it still wasn’t love.

.xxx.

She lay next to him asleep as he watched, eyes full of wonder. She was truly perfect to him. And he had done nothing to deserve her, but she was here. In his arms, in his bed. Not because he made her, it was because she wanted to be there. And that was probably the best feeling in the world.

Butterfly kisses placed onto her shoulder, breath against her skin and hands on her hair. This was a moment in heaven. A moment that people wait a lifetime for, but never have. And in that second he thanked a god that he didn’t even believe in. feeling the need to thank something for her.

But it wasn’t love.

It was too wrong.

.xxx.

Standing over her gravestone, tracing the engraved letters. Letters that were carved into his heart and soul by now. Knowing them off by heart.

KarmaTyler Davis.
1976 – 2006
Beloved sister, daughter and friend.
Forever missed.

Nothing on that stone said a word about how she died. About the way metal looked covered in blood, about the way the glass looked at it sliced open her skin. About the way the wall fell down around her. The word that were wrote down made it sound so simple. So easy.

But it was anything but.

A tear rolled painfully slowly down his cheek, falling it the damp earth around him. So much pain was caught up in the years they had together. Pain strong enough to kill. But he didn’t regret it. Not even once. He wouldn’t trade them for the world.

“It was love.” He whispered, hoping against wasted hope that somehow his words reached her. “It was love.”