|The Art of Imploding
Author: Icarus-Rising PM
"When I look at you it hurts to breathe. It hurts right here..." Alexander pointed to his chest. "...and this will make it stop." m/m, f/mRated: Fiction M - English - Chapters: 13 - Words: 38,085 - Reviews: 198 - Favs: 213 - Follows: 228 - Updated: 06-16-10 - Published: 08-16-06 - id: 2231348
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
I couldn't help myself from watching him out of the corner of my eye. He sat on the other side of the room with several people around him silently begging for attention. My girlfriend was whispering words into my ear that I didn't bother to comprehend. I tilted my head slightly so she had more access to my neck and so he was in my line of vision.
He was lounging on the couch with his legs spread with casual suggestion, his eyes never meeting the gaze those he was speaking to. His face displayed an array of emotions that spanned from bored to amused but his eyes remained distant. My own eyes and mind observed him in a way I had not done to anyone in a long time. I excused the strange sensation in my stomach to be one of curiosity.
The girl at my side then started to kiss my neck just as a second boy came over to my spectacle. I turned to her and mumbled my annoyance but she ignored me and continued her administrations. She placed her thin hands on both sides of my face to turn me to face her. Long nails pressed dangerously into the soft flesh there as she crushed her lips into mine.
I made a convincing effort before pushing her away again.
I looked back to the boy only to find that he was gone.
The parties were growing in size every weekend. More people were hearing about them and more serious drug dealers started to leak in. This made me tense due to the fact that Kirsten was dangerous when inebriated.
I had developed the talent of being able to scope him out with in a half hour of my arrival. He, being the social chameleon, was never in the same place or with the same people.
This particular night, he was upstairs with all the druggies. They always collected in a quiet room and sat together in circles, with a different substance in each group. Some would rotate around the room while others stayed with their poison of choice.
Kirsten and I walked into the dark, quiet room. He was in the corner, smoking something with a few other people that I recognized from school. Tonight he was in drag: his face accented with white powder and black eyeliner. A small leather skirt adorned his long legs and his chest covered in a tight black top. My hand twitched slightly at my side as I pictured sketching his figure onto a blank page.
I felt Kirsten's arm wrap around my waist. She led me across the room, as if I was being kept on a leash. Looking around the room casually, I approved the lava lamps that were placed through out it. It took me a moment to realize that alongside the stash of chemicals, there was a lamp positioned in the center of each group, casting its color on the faces surrounding it.
My girlfriend sat down suddenly, pulling me down to the floor with her. I sat in a lazy lotus position and looked around the group she chose. My attention was immediately drawn to the face of my obsession, making my insides vanish at the realization. His back was against the farthest wall and his legs were crossed over the ankles, covering what was barely hidden by the skirt. He was staring with an empty expression at the orange lamp between us, the lava slowly rising and falling.
The world became a blur as soon as the first joint passed through my lips. Kirsten played with my hair as people came and went out of the circle. Voices and faces moved in and out of focus save for one.
I watched with fascination at the way he moved and spoke while my mind was strategizing how I would place him on canvas or paper.
As I started coming down from my high and the movement around me started to slide back into focus, I noticed Kirsten was off with another circle. There was only a few other people remaining around the orange lamp including my unknowing model.
A girl was curled up at his side, his arm around her shoulder. She was whispering in his ear much like Kirsten did to me the first night I noticed him. His relaxed face changed to one of annoyance as she started to undo his belt. I tried to ignore them by looking away but parts of the verbal exchange were loud enough for me to hear.
I don't do girls...
That one stuck in my mind even if it didn't truly register then. The girl eventually gave up on him and left the room, leaving only him and myself at the orange lamp. I turned back to him cautiously to find his eyes raking over my body. My face heated up quickly so I turned away, hearing the lighter click as he took another hit. I couldn't locate Kirsten in the room which didn't bother me at all.
"You've been watching me." He stated smoothly with his bored voice. It made me look back at him slowly, trying to keep my face void from any emotion. He was smiling at me, his face not suggestive or accusing as he did so.
Just as I opened my mouth to respond the sound of sirens could be heard coming up the driveway. The boy in front of me was on his feet before I even realized our situation. He bent down and put his hands under my arms and helped me onto my feet. The groups around us started to follow suit, some faster then others. My model grabbed me by the wrist and led me out into the hall. The crowd pushed against us as he led me against the current of people.
Once the people were done passing us he let me go and continued down the hall. I followed with out question once the sounds of loud, deep voices were heard far behind us. He slid out an open window and jumped down onto lawn, landing in the backyard. He waited for me to do the same before casually walking away from the scene.
Once we got a few blocks away he pointed back towards the house,
"Yet another example of why you never follow the crowd." He walked backwards so he could face me as we walked down the sidewalk. "You were about to say something, before we were so rudely interrupted..." I smiled at his words and nodded.
"I think I was about to confess to your accusation." He nodded and smiled knowingly. His pace slowed to a stop.
"You interest in me is not out of lust, is it?" He stated bluntly with a truly curious look that met his eyes. Giving him a sideways look, I met up along side of him and we began to walk together.
"Do you have somewhere to go?" I asked. He turned and looked right at me.
"Not yet." I mindlessly invited him to my dorm in which he responded with laughter. "So you're a student then?" I nodded. "I thought they didn't allow nightly visitors in their dorms." He added with a smirk.
"They don't. I'm more worried about my girlfriend dropping in tomorrow morning."
"Oh right, that leach that was with you earlier." He asked as he shoved his hands in his tight pockets.
"I don't think she will be back until tomorrow night anyways." I murmured as I looked towards the pavement. He looked at me strangely then and I silently begged for him to not ask why. A long silence followed the statement leaving me to break it. I said:
"I like your shoes."
He looked down at his bare feet and laughed. "Thanks, so can I follow you?"