CHAPTER 1

“Hello Karen.” The Priest greeting as he was escorting to a cell which contained a thirty year old woman.

“Hi there Priesty.” Karen waved her hand in return to the Priest.

The Priest gave a small smile to the woman who was lying on the thin mattress in the small cell. The guard unlocked the door and ushered the Priest in with a nod and locked the door again and walked down the hall to give the two some privacy. The Priest took the only chair in the cell and sat down, looking at the woman.

“Is it that time already?” Karen asked, slowly sitting up, brushing her long unruly brown hair out of her face and staring up at the Priest with dull green eyes.

“Yes. And today is your last time to, Karen.” The Priest replied with a solemn look on his face.

“Don’t be sad Father Matthew. I’ve accepted the fact long ago.” Karen said, patting the Priest’s hand which sat limply on his lap.

“Will you tell me now of your regrets and confessions, my dear?” Father Matthew asked.

“To tell regrets you must have them. For me, Father, what I have done has already been done and I can’t change that, so why linger on it.” Karen said matter-of-factly.

“You mean to tell me, you have no regrets?

“That’s right. Regrets make you weak and being weak in this world is not an option to me.”

“Then what about confessions? You must have some confessions.”

“No, Father. I am fully aware of what I did and how bad it is. I am ready to face whatever hell awaits me in the afterlife.” Karen gave a small laugh. “Which, I am going to Hell for.”

“You don’t want to be forgiven by the Lord?” Father Matthew asked shocked.

“You are wasting your time with me, Father. I do not go by the Bible; I have my own way of thinking.” Karen replied, looking at the cracked ceiling, as if bored.

“And what is your way of thinking, Karen?”

“I do not want a book to tell me how to think. And since you asked, on this subject, my thoughts are simple. Just by confessing doesn’t make you forgiven by God. It just makes you feel better. If you were good in life, you go to Heaven. If you fucked it up and sinned then you go to Hell, no matter how many times you confess. Simple as that.”

“But not all people think that way.”

“And that is why I don’t go to church or read the Bible. We don’t have the same views.”

“Don’t you have anything you want to talk about?” Father Matthew asked, raising his eyebrows.

Karen looked intently at the old Priest. He was forty-three, lives his whole life Catholic and by the Bible. Never ventured out and done anything bad. She knew this from their previous visits together. His pale blue eyes locked onto hers and they stared at each other for a few moments before Karen finally looked away with a small smile on her face.

“I’ll tell you my story, if you want that.” She said the smile still in place. A playful smile that she hasn’t given to anyone for several years. “And if you have the time.”

“I’ll make time. I want to understand why you did what you did.” Father Matthew said after a pause.

“And how. But first you must abandon all your beliefs at the door. They do not intertwine with my story, and if you start making them I will stop and you won’t understand. You got that, Father?” Karen said the last word with sarcasm. Her eyes returning to the Priests eyes, searching them for the answer before he finally nodded.

“I will not interrupt with my own beliefs. You have my word. I want to hear your story, the whole story. As long as it is true.”

“I wouldn’t dream of lying about such a tale. Now sit back and relax. This might take a few hours.” Karen took a deep breath and continued. “I knew back when I was young that I had a morbid fascination with dead. It was so relaxing. So soothing.”