Kanna-sama: I was opening my Snapple bottle and saw the top where it said ‘reject if button is up’ and I got a very short, but funny idea.

X

Rating: K

Genre: Humor

Summary: Complete. A lemon Snapple has a crush on a kiwi-strawberry one, but he’s surprisingly rejected! Another pointless humor drabble from yours truly.

Notes/Warnings: Pointlessness; drabble

X

Reject if button is up

A lemon Snapple sighed. His name was Dave. He had had a crush on one of the kiwi-strawberry Snapple’s for a very long time. Her name was Darla and he had to admit, for a kiwi-strawberry Snapple, she was pretty. Her bottle was so intact, while some of his wrapper had been ripped off. He was just never treated nicely! As they were being shipped to Albertson’s, he approached her.

“Hi,” he greeted.

“Hi.”

“I’m Dave,” he said lamely. She eyed him and the kiwi-strawberry juice shifted in her bottle for a moment, before she gave him a kind look.

“I’m Darla.”

“I, um, know this is sudden, but I really like you and, well, I’d like it if we could go out. Maybe go to a party with some Mountain Dew or Pepsi?”

“Well...” She eyed him again, then gave a disgusted look. “Ugh! How revolting! Of course I wouldn’t go out with you.” He stared at her, shocked. “Your button is up! And it says right there, reject if button is up.Sicko!” She hopped away from him angrily and he gaped after her.

After they were shipped to Albertson’s and put on the shelves, a woman bought him. After she bought him, she went outside and moved to open him, then gave a disgusted look similar to Darla’s. “Ugh! The button isn’t down! Oh, well.” She tossed him away.

“Noooo! WHY, BUTTON, WHY DID YOU HAVE TO BE UP?” He cried mournfully. “Noooooooo! Darla! Lady, come back! I’m not a bad Snapple, I’m not!” Eventually, his cap came off and his Snapple was drained and then he died. Well, that is the fate of a Snapple whose button is up.

X

Kanna-sama: Yes, I agree it was pointless, but I just came to that idea randomly. Sorry if it didn’t exactly hit your funny bone. Like I warned, it was pointless. To those who are waiting for me to post something new – and better than this – then you’re in luck. I’m working on a story right now and should have it up soon. Anyway, please review on your way out, even if it is a flame. Ciao!