|Confessions of a Teenage Ninja
Author: Mistress of Whitechapel PM
Following the journies of a teen ninja, strictly humorousRated: Fiction K+ - English - Humor - Words: 535 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 09-13-06 - id: 2246381
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Note: Okay, this is a little thing I did a while back, I may continue with it later, but my friends thought I should post it here. It's kind of cute, really.
So, you want to know MY story? Really? Me? How nice!
Well, as you must know by the title here, I'm a teenage ninja. I hate this stupid place, these stupid uniforms, and these stupid people!
It all started when I was taking a stroll through this nice village in Japan. This ninja jerk saw me, captured me, then took me in to go for training of the 'ninja ways'. I laugh in his face.
I was thirteen then, I'm sixteen now. I can do so many things. I can sneak around corners, blend in with the night, walk so soundlessly. I could steal and never be caught, even on camera.
Yes, there are still ninja clans out there, just not so many. We were nearly wiped out long ago for being no longer needed. But we still hang around, helping others. We're a lot like unseen heroes. Those that see us, don't believe it.
And I suppose that's good. Ninjas aren't supposed to exist, we're supposed to be there when needed but not be seen. My social life is the pits, everyone thinks I'm dead, my parents are who knows where!
In other words, being a ninja sucks.
But I guess it has it's ups, respect, being nice and healthy, you're active, I guess that's all. Because, like I said before, I've got no social life!
The other day my grandmaster came in to speak to me. He said I had an assignment, to sneak into this camp and kill this one guy. Preferably by slitting his throat. I accepted it; I usually do stuff like this every few days. Well, not really, that was the first time I've ever done that. I'd like to say I did it very well, and the grandmaster called me a prodigy when it came to the 'ninja ways'. But to be very honest, I failed miserably. Actually, that's an understatement. I failed utterly, completely, and totally miserably.
So, anyway, I went to that camp. I sneaked through the trees, weaving and ducking. It was quite a nice show if I do say so my self. But that's where my grand show of stealth and wisdom ended. Nobody told me they had dogs there! That's what I have to say in my defense.
So, just as I was poised outside the tent of the guy who got the death sentence, this big, ugly, brute of a dog starts barking and growling. I was scared, I admit it. He was mean, and I swear he had rabies.
So, I hightailed it out of there. The end.
Actually, no. I screamed. Yes. Laugh all you want, but I screamed. And I screamed, really screamed.
So the guy I was told to kill came out of his tent. Along with an army of other guys. THEN I hightailed it outta there. Along with an arrow that got lodged in my arm.